agnostic seeking advice

[anon1111]

i like this girl, but she won't date me because i'm not a 'strong christian'.

^ you've probably heard that before..

anyway. i went to a christian school where we had chapel and stuff, my family is small and not very religious. my parents divorced when i was young and religion was never a big thing in my life, they didn't attend church either.

sometimes i get kind of depressed, i feel lost and restless, like there is a void in my life which isn't pleasurable, and maybe God could fill this void?

from a logical point of view, i feel like i am agnostic. i've read religion philosophy before but i still feel inclined to believe that we just don't know.

i've also met some religious people before that have been overly nice that its made me sick. this is probably just a few people though and like in any group of people you'll find some you don't get a long with..?

when it comes down to it, i don't know if i can believe. i'd like to say i'm open minded and that anything is possible, but i'm not sure... adopting a christian stance does seem more close minded to me than agnosticism.

i'd like to say that love is all it takes to conquer any obstacle too. i've asked a friend about this and they said that i shouldn't change who i am for anybody, which also makes a lot of sense to me.

however, being a perfectly well rounded human being we should be in touch with our mind, body, and spirit right? well, that also makes a lot of sense to me. my spirit seems to be lacking. as i said before, i feel depressed / lost / restless sometimes. these feelings come and go. when i'm with this girl, i'm happy too.

i don't even know if she'd date me or not if i became a christian, but i probably wouldn't care if i lost that sense of void.

it seems like a weak excuse to change who i am for a girl, but if it makes me happy... i think i should. i'm not sure i'd like a religious life though either, so obviously that wouldn't make me happy if i didn't. maybe its not meant to be. should i try to attend church anyway just to see what its like?

what is 'being a strong christian' fundamentally about anyway? is it going to church, reading the bible, attending christian social functions (like she and many of her friends do)?

opinions / thoughts greatly appreciated.

 

[Danus]

Hi there annon. Welcome to this forum.

I don't normally answer post within the context of post, but in your case I think it would be the best way. You'll see what I mean below.

Let me start by saying I like what you've written here. You sound a lot like me when I was younger. I totally get what you have honestly laid out and so let's see if I can shed some light on this for you.

Little background on me before I start. I'm 45, or 46...I don't keep up and it does not matter I've been a Christian for about 20 years.

i like this girl, but she won't date me because i'm not a 'strong christian'.

^ you've probably heard that before..

anyway. i went to a christian school where we had chapel and stuff, my family is small and not very religious. my parents divorced when i was young and religion was never a big thing in my life, they didn't attend church either.

sometimes i get kind of depressed, i feel lost and restless, like there is a void in my life which isn't pleasurable, and maybe God could fill this void?

The void you feel is spot on. I am glad to hear you say this. Some say that we all have a God shaped void in our lives that we try to fill with all sorts of things. drugs, money, power, control, or pleasures.

It's a void that only God can fill. I've found this to be very true.

Now, I'm going to say something bold, but the fact that you are aware of this void, is the voice of God calling to you. We hear the voice of God in many ways just like this. He's waiting for your response.

from a logical point of view, i feel like i am agnostic. i've read religion philosophy before but i still feel inclined to believe that we just don't know.

You are an agnostic. The bible tells us that we start out this way so to speak. We are born of original sin, and as we get older that tends to magnify. This is to say that as a baby we posses a sort of innocence, but we are still sinful by nature. Along the way we are wooed by the spirit of God such as you are now by the understanding of the void in your life.

So it's not so much a logical state as it is natural state. The nature of man is sinful. All have sin, and all fall short of the glory of God; that is to say the perfect goodness or wholly good of God. No man measures up.

i've also met some religious people before that have been overly nice that its made me sick. this is probably just a few people though and like in any group of people you'll find some you don't get a long with..?

...yes me to. I hope I'm not one of those. I don't care for the term "religious". I have a relationship with Christ. I am a Christian, but I'm not religious.

In Jesus's day there where many religious people that made him sick. :verysick..... They where so religious that they did not recognize him, missed him.

when it comes down to it, i don't know if i can believe. i'd like to say i'm open minded and that anything is possible, but i'm not sure... adopting a christian stance does seem more close minded to me than agnosticism.

Belief and faith are not the same. God does not need you to simply believe. If you want to know God, you need to trust God. You need to let go of the side of the pool, so to speak. he will show you faith.

i'd like to say that love is all it takes to conquer any obstacle too. i've asked a friend about this and they said that i shouldn't change who i am for anybody, which also makes a lot of sense to me.

Well, your right. God is not really asking you to change, He made you for a unique purpose, but he needs to lead you before you can know your full potential.

We think we know love. We say "I love you" to that special someone, and once a year we buy cards with little hearts on them and give them out. we say things like; "I love ice cream!"....this is not love.

Love is what God is all about, and you will never truly know love until you know God.

here a just a taste of what Love is truly about. NOTE; I'm going to give you some verses from the bible, but this is from The Message translation. I would not recommend this as a study bible, but I think it will speak to you better for understanding.

1 Corinthians 13

Love Is the Greatest

1 If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 3 If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.
4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

8 Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! 9 Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! 10 But when the time of perfection comes, these partial things will become useless.

11 When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. 12 Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity.[c] All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

13 Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.

however, being a perfectly well rounded human being we should be in touch with our mind, body, and spirit right? well, that also makes a lot of sense to me. my spirit seems to be lacking. as i said before, i feel depressed / lost / restless sometimes. these feelings come and go. when i'm with this girl, i'm happy too.

Don't keep God waiting. How long will you not answer the knock at your door. Get the door.

i don't even know if she'd date me or not if i became a christian, but i probably wouldn't care if i lost that sense of void.

it seems like a weak excuse to change who i am for a girl, but if it makes me happy... i think i should. i'm not sure i'd like a religious life though either, so obviously that wouldn't make me happy if i didn't. maybe its not meant to be. should i try to attend church anyway just to see what its like?

what is 'being a strong christian' fundamentally about anyway? is it going to church, reading the bible, attending christian social functions (like she and many of her friends do)?

opinions / thoughts greatly appreciated.

Your right. A girl is a weak excuse to become a Christian and it's a mistake. Don't let this be about a girl. You obviously have too much integrity than that, and I applaud you for that honesty.

I know you've meet someone special to you, but this is more than that. This is about God trying to get you. He's more about you than you are about this girl.

What is a strong Christian? That's a good question. Some are stronger than others, but the strength of any Christian is something that grows over time within their relationship with God.

I used to ask "what can God do for me?" when I first became a christian. I'd pray for things like patients and God would answer me by placing me in situations that required patients. My point is, God builds us up in ways we don't always understand, but over time we become useful Christians and not just whinny baby Christians.

Now I ask what can I do for God? Some say I'm a strong Christian, but I still pray for strength.

There is so much I could say about being a Christian. there is not enough room here to say it all, but bottom line it's about a relationship with Christ where Christ leads your life by his will and not your's.

God says this, Jeremiah 29:11
New International Version (NIV)
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

If you want to be a Christian you're going to have to trust this. I can't tell you what will happen in your life, but I can promise you it will be better than anything you could ever do for yourself if you will give your life to Jesus Christ today. You won't hear trumpets from haven, a glorious light will not shine down on you...but you will begin the fine walk on your journey through this life.

If there is anything I can do to help. Just let me know.

 

[karlcrow]

i like this girl, but she won't date me because i'm not a 'strong christian'.

^ you've probably heard that before..

anyway. i went to a christian school where we had chapel and stuff, my family is small and not very religious. my parents divorced when i was young and religion was never a big thing in my life, they didn't attend church either.

sometimes i get kind of depressed, i feel lost and restless, like there is a void in my life which isn't pleasurable, and maybe God could fill this void?

from a logical point of view, i feel like i am agnostic. i've read religion philosophy before but i still feel inclined to believe that we just don't know.

i've also met some religious people before that have been overly nice that its made me sick. this is probably just a few people though and like in any group of people you'll find some you don't get a long with..?

when it comes down to it, i don't know if i can believe. i'd like to say i'm open minded and that anything is possible, but i'm not sure... adopting a christian stance does seem more close minded to me than agnosticism.

i'd like to say that love is all it takes to conquer any obstacle too. i've asked a friend about this and they said that i shouldn't change who i am for anybody, which also makes a lot of sense to me.

however, being a perfectly well rounded human being we should be in touch with our mind, body, and spirit right? well, that also makes a lot of sense to me. my spirit seems to be lacking. as i said before, i feel depressed / lost / restless sometimes. these feelings come and go. when i'm with this girl, i'm happy too.

i don't even know if she'd date me or not if i became a christian, but i probably wouldn't care if i lost that sense of void.

it seems like a weak excuse to change who i am for a girl, but if it makes me happy... i think i should. i'm not sure i'd like a religious life though either, so obviously that wouldn't make me happy if i didn't. maybe its not meant to be. should i try to attend church anyway just to see what its like?

what is 'being a strong christian' fundamentally about anyway? is it going to church, reading the bible, attending christian social functions (like she and many of her friends do)?

opinions / thoughts greatly appreciated.

You can't get a relationship with Jesus just by going along with your female friends beliefs. If I were you go outside pick a flower then look at it closely, you can see how beautifully designed it is so it must have a maker, ie God look at what he has in store for mankinds future earth ie peacefull with decent people, no suffering,no illness. See if you want it by studying the bible and making changes for the better.

 

[farouk]

i like this girl, but she won't date me because i'm not a 'strong christian'.

^ you've probably heard that before..

anyway. i went to a christian school where we had chapel and stuff, my family is small and not very religious. my parents divorced when i was young and religion was never a big thing in my life, they didn't attend church either.

sometimes i get kind of depressed, i feel lost and restless, like there is a void in my life which isn't pleasurable, and maybe God could fill this void?

from a logical point of view, i feel like i am agnostic. i've read religion philosophy before but i still feel inclined to believe that we just don't know.

i've also met some religious people before that have been overly nice that its made me sick. this is probably just a few people though and like in any group of people you'll find some you don't get a long with..?

when it comes down to it, i don't know if i can believe. i'd like to say i'm open minded and that anything is possible, but i'm not sure... adopting a christian stance does seem more close minded to me than agnosticism.

i'd like to say that love is all it takes to conquer any obstacle too. i've asked a friend about this and they said that i shouldn't change who i am for anybody, which also makes a lot of sense to me.

however, being a perfectly well rounded human being we should be in touch with our mind, body, and spirit right? well, that also makes a lot of sense to me. my spirit seems to be lacking. as i said before, i feel depressed / lost / restless sometimes. these feelings come and go. when i'm with this girl, i'm happy too.

i don't even know if she'd date me or not if i became a christian, but i probably wouldn't care if i lost that sense of void.

it seems like a weak excuse to change who i am for a girl, but if it makes me happy... i think i should. i'm not sure i'd like a religious life though either, so obviously that wouldn't make me happy if i didn't. maybe its not meant to be. should i try to attend church anyway just to see what its like?

what is 'being a strong christian' fundamentally about anyway? is it going to church, reading the bible, attending christian social functions (like she and many of her friends do)?

opinions / thoughts greatly appreciated.

anon:

Hi, good to see you here. Basically I think the main question should be about your relationship with God, rather than about one with a young lady, with whom you're maybe not sure if you believe the same things anyway. Amos 3.3 says: "Can two walk together, except they be agreed?"

Firstly, a relationship in faith with God needs to be established on the basis of Gospel truths such as in John 3.16: "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

This would be such a great thing, that it's really worthwhile making sure of this first, by faith.

Thanks for your question.

 

[WIP]

sometimes i get kind of depressed, i feel lost and restless, like there is a void in my life which isn't pleasurable, and maybe God could fill this void? Absolutely!

from a logical point of view, i feel like i am agnostic. i've read religion philosophy before but i still feel inclined to believe that we just don't know. You can know. The hardest part is to give up your worldly things/feelings and put your trust, ALL your trust in Jesus Christ but when you do a whole new world opens up for you because He will change your life in ways you never dreamed possible.

i've also met some religious people before that have been overly nice that its made me sick. this is probably just a few people though and like in any group of people you'll find some you don't get a long with..?

when it comes down to it, i don't know if i can believe. i'd like to say i'm open minded and that anything is possible, but i'm not sure... adopting a christian stance does seem more close minded to me than agnosticism. Actually, and I mean no disrespect as I am a former non-believer, when you surrender and turn to Jesus your mind will open up in ways you can't imagine and you'll come to realize how closed your mind really is.

i'd like to say that love is all it takes to conquer any obstacle too. i've asked a friend about this and they said that i shouldn't change who i am for anybody, which also makes a lot of sense to me.

however, being a perfectly well rounded human being we should be in touch with our mind, body, and spirit right? well, that also makes a lot of sense to me. my spirit seems to be lacking. as i said before, i feel depressed / lost / restless sometimes. these feelings come and go. when i'm with this girl, i'm happy too. That restlessness you feel could be God knocking on your door. Don't be afraid to open it.

i don't even know if she'd date me or not if i became a christian, but i probably wouldn't care if i lost that sense of void. You'd be surprised of how much void God can fill. Focus on Jesus and the rest will fall into place as He executes His plan for you.

it seems like a weak excuse to change who i am for a girl, but if it makes me happy... i think i should. i'm not sure i'd like a religious life though either, so obviously that wouldn't make me happy if i didn't. maybe its not meant to be. should i try to attend church anyway just to see what its like? Attend a good Christian church not to gain this girl's heart but to learn how to give your heart over to God. The rest will come if it’s part of His plan for you.

what is 'being a strong christian' fundamentally about anyway? is it going to church, reading the bible, attending christian social functions (like she and many of her friends do)? It's a belief, faith, and way of life that transcends all those things you mention. Attending church services, fellow-shipping, reading/studying the Bible, participating in Christian social functions are all helpful for keeping us on the straight and narrow but in the end its about trust. Recognize that you are a sinner like everyone else, that sin leads to death, that Jesus died for our sins, and we are saved by faith. Put your faith and trust in Jesus Christ as your lord and savior. He is faithful to the end.