This thread is basically about getting to the end of a debate and saying, Yes/No, debates that are dead ends. It's good to debate, but we should know when to stop. If you feel you've come across debates like this, post them here.
I'm not sure a debate closes publicly as yes or no on a particular issue, or that a debate necessarily should. Often though, people walk away from a debate still clinging to their "aspersions" toward their own opposition, and that is where growth tends to stop.
A lot of it has to do with how a debate starts. It's either honest or deceptive.
Often someone will post a thread pretending to ask an honest question of their opposition, when actually their looking for an unsuspecting victim. Someone who might be trying to answer them honestly from the perspective they claim to seek. The desire of the OP in such a case is to hope the responder is unprepared for the verbal fight that lay ahead. These are what you might call dishonest ambushes. ;)
Another popular start of a thread is the false dichotomy argument. We see this all the time, where someone will make a statement or ask a question that does not have a full scope, only leaving limited options that of themselves are not true, or are missing. For example; "Can you be gay and be a Christian? " This seems like a good question, and in many ways it is, but it sets the answer up to be a false dichotomy , because the answer depends on a lot of factors that need to be explained or answered. There is not enough information in the question to warrant a yes or no answer, and someone could answer yes or no with plenty of reasonable defense.
The false dilemma, or dichotomy can be constructed honestly (as it often is) or dishonestly. It can be in the form of a statement or a question.
What I suggest people do when they know they are in debate territory, is decide what side they are on in terms of offense or defense. In verbal, physical present debates, where two people are debating and there is an audience, the task of debating is more challenging, because your trying to make your argument weigh more than your opponent. Your audience is the judge of this, and they are fickle. Who knows what sways them? It could be the better looking of the two, or it could be the logic, or passion of the argument. So you have to use all your means to get the point across and identify with the audience. This is true in court, in politics, in business meetings, and sadly also in religion. (Notice I said religion).
One thing for sure, everyone has an opinion, or thought about something. How many times have you heard someone say they don't care for someone else because that person is "Opinionated"
....next time you hear someone say that ask them; "Is that your opinion?"
....then you will also make their list.
Debate, however uncomfortable it is, is important. Know what it is you think you know and realize others either don't know what you know, or know something in opposition to what you know. You must know what they know the way they know it if you plan to succeed in a debate, and the only way to know that is to engage them. However, how you engage an argument, and the tools you use, are vital to the success of an argument. Many people may have a winning, or correct argument but loose a debate because they don't have the techniques to argue the opposition.
In Christianity;
Never "AGREE" to disagree. That's just a tie. That's just being defeated. That's just giving up. Let your final words be the final blow and walk away. Leave your opponent wounded in the ring or in his corner nursing his wounds; trying to figure out what happened, or realizing they where not prepared for what they got. This place; this forum, should be a training ground. The real ring is in the world. As for the people who don't agree with you? Matthew 10:14 (NIV) 14 If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, leave that home or town and shake the dust off your feet.
We can argue the Gospel, and we may all have a variety of opinions, but it does not mean much in terms of swaying anyone's position, because all we are doing in the end is finding out who agrees with us in the first place, and making ourselves known to others. That's very important, because right now their are people in the world who agree with you about God, they just don't know it. They need us to make ourselves known to them so that they may know us. Matthew 7:16 (NIV) 16 By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles?
True, people align themselves with others like them. No one tries to turn a thorn-bush into a fig tree, or water it in hopes it will turn into a fig tree, or plant it among other fig trees, but a fig tree in the midst of thorn-bushes needs other fig trees. It's worth watering.
Sometimes the staff looks for ways to help control debates here on the A&T. We should do this so that debates are fair, no hitting below the belt kind of stuff. However, it's not done to just kill off an opposing or unpopular view that might have some merit, or worth.
Jesus, it seems, never called anyone names or developed a false argument about anyone. He just said it like it was, and if you didn't like it, so be it, but he left His opponents puzzled. The devil himself gave up on Him, but instead used others to fight Him, and he still lost. Jesus spoke the truth, some recognized it and some did not. We should do the same. Speak the truth in Love and
Mercy. Do not ever stop and do not agree to disagree, but rather do not think your opponent has won anything if you have spoken the truth in Love and Mercy.
These are to me, the most chilling words of God found in the bible. Deuteronomy 32:35 (NIV) 35 It is mine to avenge; I will repay.
In due time their foot will slip;
their day of disaster is near
and their doom rushes upon them.â€.............
In due time.
) The whole list would be a long one for sure, but these are just some examples of things in scripture that I don't see as very black and white when you actually listen with respect and an open mind to arguments on both sides before forming an opinion. There is a difference between showing open minded respect (to a rational opinion) and being blindly tolerant of any idea anyone has just because that's the popular thing to do today. 
