hi there I've posted on here before and am fairly new but I wanted to post again.
I desperately want to be saved but I also reject Jesus and worry about the passage that says whoever rejects the Son does not see life but the wrath of God abides on him. I think my fears come from when I repented back in Feb I didn't know it was a salvation experience and I was in contact with the Holy Spirit all night. Jesus spoke to me and told me to read the Bible about the resurrection but I didn't come to faith because I thought I had to get it right. it was so heart breaking for me and some horrible demonic attacks happened after that that I tried to repent many times and come to faith but it didn't work. I'm terrified of coming to faith and not repenting or repenting and not coming to faith. I'm struggling with night paralysis from demons every night and sinful dreams. and I pray a lot and read the Bible but my church believes im saved when I'm not. I want to come to faith and believe im nearly ready but every time I do I get anxious the minute it enters my heart. I need wisdom from God to know why this is happening and.why I'm getting anxious but its possibly because of what happened in Feb and how I didn't know God was trying to save me and I thought then I was his daughter forever. I desperately need prayers but don't know if I'm allowed to ask for them here so ill ask the administrator. but apart from that I need to know why I'm so scared of being saved. I feel my heart is being prepared for it but I need to trust the Lord and in terrified he won't wait for me and.will cut me off at any moment . apologies for the typos im using my phone. all the best
I desperately want to be saved but I also reject Jesus and worry about the passage that says whoever rejects the Son does not see life but the wrath of God abides on him. I think my fears come from when I repented back in Feb I didn't know it was a salvation experience and I was in contact with the Holy Spirit all night. Jesus spoke to me and told me to read the Bible about the resurrection but I didn't come to faith because I thought I had to get it right. it was so heart breaking for me and some horrible demonic attacks happened after that that I tried to repent many times and come to faith but it didn't work. I'm terrified of coming to faith and not repenting or repenting and not coming to faith. I'm struggling with night paralysis from demons every night and sinful dreams. and I pray a lot and read the Bible but my church believes im saved when I'm not. I want to come to faith and believe im nearly ready but every time I do I get anxious the minute it enters my heart. I need wisdom from God to know why this is happening and.why I'm getting anxious but its possibly because of what happened in Feb and how I didn't know God was trying to save me and I thought then I was his daughter forever. I desperately need prayers but don't know if I'm allowed to ask for them here so ill ask the administrator. but apart from that I need to know why I'm so scared of being saved. I feel my heart is being prepared for it but I need to trust the Lord and in terrified he won't wait for me and.will cut me off at any moment . apologies for the typos im using my phone. all the best