Bipolar Disorder

[DarkWalker]

I am not a mental health professional, so I cannot diagnose or treat any physical or mental ailment. However, I've started this thread for people who are curious about (or who have) bipolar disorder. I admit that I am hypomanic at the moment, which means I have a tendency to share too much. I apologize if my interaction with the forum offends you.

I was diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder and non-combat PTSD while I was hospitalized in May for homicidal ideations. To be clear, I had no intention of harming anyone, but my brain kept "feeding me" a barrage of images, as if to say, "here's an idea." I also had anger and stress related to these ideations. After twelve days in a mental hospital observation unit, I was prescribed Lithium (for the mood fluctuations), Vistaril (for insomnia), and Prazosin (for nightmares related to PTSD).

Everyone's experience with bipolar disorder is unique, so I can only offer my experience, but I am happy to answer questions and clear away misconceptions about the illness I have. If you have bipolar disorder as well and feel comfortable offering up your experiences, please do so.

With that, if anyone's ever wondered anything about bipolar disorder, please feel free to ask me. I can be a very open book, and I do not mind telling the truth about who I was or am capable of being. The truth really does set you free.

 

[Claudya]

Something I wondered about being manic... do you actually feel happy while being in a manic state, or do you just feel agitated, restless and aggressive?
I used to think it's the opposite of depression - happiness, joy, love, and so on - but from my own experience with bipolar people it seems to me that isn't pleasurable at all. It's more like a mix of aggression and overconfidence and some paranoid thinking/ perception.

 

[DarkWalker]

Something I wondered about being manic... do you actually feel happy while being in a manic state, or do you just feel agitated, restless and aggressive?
I used to think it's the opposite of depression - happiness, joy, love, and so on - but from my own experience with bipolar people it seems to me that isn't pleasurable at all. It's more like a mix of aggression and overconfidence and some paranoid thinking/ perception.

It can be either. Hypomania ("mania light") or full-blown mania can involve a range of emotions, from euphoria to anger. When I am (hypo)manic, I am usually overly confident and therefore happy, but as soon as something does not go my way, I'm very irritable. Agitation feels like ants crawling in my veins, or like someone has wrapped all my muscles around my spine and is slowly twirling it, tightening the muscles until they feel like they are going to snap. It is also easier to be paranoid when I am (hypo)manic.

Edited to Add:

Hypomania for me presents with insomnia, irritability, and hypersexuality. I may become stationary if I become involved with pornography, but my mind will race from one sexual interest to the next. When hypersexuality is not present (which is not often, but it happens), it looks more like the scene from the film, "Silver Linings Playbook," where the main character is searching for his wedding video. There is a lot of language you may find objectionable, but if you are curious, search YouTube for "silver linings playbook wedding video scene." The scene is about four minutes long.

 

[Claudya]

Very interesting, thanks!

When I am (hypo)manic, I am usually overly confident and therefore happy,

Sounds like me drunk. ^_^

but as soon as something does not go my way, I'm very irritable.

Sounds like me sober. >_<

Joking aside, it doesn't sound fun at all, especially the agitation part.
When your manic, do you sometimes do things you regret later? Like spending too much money, doing risky stuff or doing things that hurt people you like?


A year ago I was a patient in a psychiatric day hospital (you show up in the morning, have therapies and such throughout the day and go home in the evening) and one fellow patient was a young girl with a Bipolar disorder with so called "ultra rapid cycling" pattern, which means her depressive or manic episodes didn't last weeks or months like in Bipolar I or II sufferers, but only days, sometimes only one day with no remission time inbetween. She didn't respond much to typical Bipolar medication, so psychiatrists were trying to teach her behavioural techinques for better self management, with some success, but she'll probably always be a frequent guest in mental wards.

Anyway. We could watch her go through depression and mania on a week-by week basis. While she was sad, slowed down and miserable, but still likeable and adjusted in her depressive episodes, she was insufferable when maniac. She was loud, suggestive, laughing hysterically all the time, even whe it was absolutely inapprobriate, bouncing around and unable to sit still and hold a conversation.
One would think she was having a lot of fun.
But in one of her more level headed moments she told me and other patients that even while maniac the rational part of her mind is still there and aware that she's misbehaving and getting on everyone's nerves and doing incredible damage to her relationships with all other people. But even though she doesn't want to do that she can't stop it. That's really creepy.

 

[DarkWalker]

Very interesting, thanks!

...

When your manic, do you sometimes do things you regret later? Like spending too much money, doing risky stuff or doing things that hurt people you like?

A year ago I was a patient in a psychiatric day hospital (you show up in the morning, have therapies and such throughout the day and go home in the evening) and one fellow patient was a young girl with a Bipolar disorder with so called "ultra rapid cycling" pattern, which means her depressive or manic episodes didn't last weeks or months like in Bipolar I or II sufferers, but only days, sometimes only one day with no remission time inbetween. She didn't respond much to typical Bipolar medication, so psychiatrists were trying to teach her behavioural techinques for better self management, with some success, but she'll probably always be a frequent guest in mental wards.

Anyway. We could watch her go through depression and mania on a week-by week basis. While she was sad, slowed down and miserable, but still likeable and adjusted in her depressive episodes, she was insufferable when maniac. She was loud, suggestive, laughing hysterically all the time, even whe it was absolutely inapprobriate, bouncing around and unable to sit still and hold a conversation.
One would think she was having a lot of fun.
But in one of her more level headed moments she told me and other patients that even while maniac the rational part of her mind is still there and aware that she's misbehaving and getting on everyone's nerves and doing incredible damage to her relationships with all other people. But even though she doesn't want to do that she can't stop it. That's really creepy.

I am prone to spending money impulsively, taking risks (such as wandering off into uncharted territory), and definitely hurting others. Sadly, I was a contributing factor to one young lady's suicide.

We had someone like that when I was in the hospital, though he was a schizophrenic. He said the same thing, that he is aware of what he is doing, but he cannot stop. I have often felt the same way, which has led to struggles with guilt and doubts of my own salvation. I have found that every bipolar person I talk to can relate to the idea of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

 

[Christ_empowered]

I apparently have Bipolar I w/psychotic features. Mostly psychotic depression, one very bad manic/mixed episode with intense psychosis. Not fun. I take Abilify, Lamictal, and Trileptal.

I'd recommend anticonvulsants over lithium, personally.

 

[DarkWalker]

I apparently have Bipolar I w/psychotic features. Mostly psychotic depression, one very bad manic/mixed episode with intense psychosis. Not fun. I take Abilify, Lamictal, and Trileptal.

I'd recommend anticonvulsants over lithium, personally.

Yes, now that I have experience with it, I'm not a fan of Lithium, either. I need to speak with my psychiatrist about alternatives, but I don't know when I'll be able to talk to her. I see her once every few months, and she rarely looks at me when we talk. She cuts me off, missing what I consider to be vital information, and then dismisses me after a few minutes. She's very frustrating.

 

[follower]

otc b vitamins helped many in a few weeks who had been hospitalized for as long as 20 years (a couple decades ago when they still had a 'facility' in vinita, oklahoma). it's just not in the phrmk/s agenda... ... ...

 

[tim-from-pa]

Yes, I tend to push the nutrition, too. A strong B-complex, C, E, heck many of those are strong anti-oxidants. But in the medical world, unless you are dying of scurvy, or pernicious anemia (and even then), they don't bother to check the nutrition. They test your blood (and other such tests) and anything out of balance is always some sort of nutritional issue, but treat it with drugs instead. Instead of watering a wilting plant with the water it desperately needs, they shellac it up so-to-speak to make it artificially stand.

And speaking of vitamins, I must ask the OP if your vitamin D levels have been checked? Just curious, ya know, with all this Draculaian advice to stay out of the sun these days, and what little D you have (cholesterol) they try to knock that down with drugs thus totally depleting the body of that valuable vitamin. Just because they will melt in the sun, they think you will, too.

 

[follower]

i think people are dying of scurvy every day, hundreds or thousands more every day than anyone knows about ---- they still don't bother to check the nutrition. they don't even think about it.

 

[DarkWalker]

Nutrition is an important part of managing bipolar disorder, but I don't think it's "big pharma's" fault that people aren't getting the nutrition they need. Nutritious food isn't difficult to obtain, but it is less convenient than unhealthy food. Why make a salad for myself when I can buy a pre-made hamburger? The pharmaceutical companies are in business to make money. If anyone assumes otherwise, they're kidding themselves. That having been said, pharmaceutical companies are usually started with the intention of making money by helping people. That is to say, they aren't evil barons trying to keep people sick. The idea that pharmaceutical companies don't want cures is a logical fallacy; no company I have ever researched specializes in a single treatment or cure for a single illness. They have a broad stroke when it comes to the industry, allowing them to maintain a more than booming business, even if we cure, say, AIDS. Remember: the folks who work for the pharmaceutical companies get sick just like the rest of us. Executives have conditions and illnesses, and many of them are invested in their business for that reason. Many would like a cure, just like the rest of us.

When it comes to any illness--but especially mental illnesses--we are our own best advocates. If you're not getting enough good food, it is your fault (at least in the United States; things are vastly different in, say, Somalia). In the United States, Canada, England, and elsewhere in the world, we have the capability to find and eat nutritious food, even if we have to grow it ourselves (which is, again, not hard). We simply choose not to.

 

[follower]

adelle davis, in the 50's
maureen salaman, from 1960 to 2008(along with 100,000 licensed ama doctors in the usa),
the diamonds,
max gerson,md,
and hundreds of published md's, and thousands of studies, prove beyond doubt things that almost nobody officially wants to admit.
but they themselves have actually admitted this also --- the so-called "pros", / government and otherwise.

even pastors have claimed that if the people are told the truth, it would bankrupt the usa. (because official organizations would lose so much income (even though it's tainted evil income) ) .

just do a quick search of fda with whatever other terms you want --- and see what has been known about the government system since before 1950. it's not a secret at all. they just don't care if everyone knows --- the power they have is too big for anyone to do anything wide-reaching about it --- just quiet , private helps is about all anyone can accomplish.

look at the news broadcast the last 10 years about marshall tx for example ---- channels 6 and 9 and others --- on youtube ---- the 'restaurant' style set up there , all the while people continue going to their regular doctors,
but within as little as a month or 2 their licensed ama doctor tells them after testing and observation that they don't need their synthetic manmade stuff anymore - for diabetes, for high blood pressure, for cancer, for migraines, and so on ---- it's been nationwide news the last 2 months on television (antenna, don't know about cable),
and on youtube,
how the mayor then others in town 'recovered' from diagnosed terminal and non-terminal conditions by basically going on a natural raw/whole food diet.

this was actually published as far back as 1920, and many many times between 1920 and 1980, by many different doctors and many different clinics, and by the famous nobel prize winners linus pauling and dr shutes (i think shutes was one).

now though, you do have to usually do the search and research yourself to find out. officially it's poopawed/ laughed at and dismissed without even looking at the reality.

 

[Christ_empowered]

I do Orthomolecular. Not a substitute for meds for me--I'm on 4 now, lol--but I stay out of trouble and out of the hospital. I also have: good skin, thicker hair, less anxiety and agitation, and no noticeable serious side effects (no tardive dyskinesia for me, Praise God!).

So, I like it. I recommend it to everybody. I high dose a lot of the vitamins because I smoke, so I take considerably more time release C (15 grams/day) than your typical OM protocol from the 50s or whatever. Seems to help.

Anyway, even with good diet and such, the OM people say everybody needs supplements. I'm not an expert, but..it makes sense. I seem to recall reading that a lot of US citizens don't meet the RDA for some essential nutrients from diet. Throw in drinking, smoking, stress, meds, aging and...wow. Makes a strong argument for supplements.

 

[tim-from-pa]

The pharmaceutical companies are in business to make money. If anyone assumes otherwise, they're kidding themselves.

I agree.

That having been said, pharmaceutical companies are usually started with the intention of making money by helping people. That is to say, they aren't evil barons trying to keep people sick.

I disagree. Consider Chemo, for example. Pushed big time, but the vast majority of the doctors out there would not take it themselves nor recommend it for family members.

Another example -- the cholesterol scam. I think the major and embarrassing Vytorin flop shows that high cholesterol and increased heart attacks are not related. But they push this myth anyway. Why? Goes back to your point #1. It's nothing to do with truth or health. Medical so-called science has become a monetary consensus science. Popular vote wins and is the truth.

They don't think there's actual cures for disease. They "only manage" them. Translation: Here's a pill you'll have to constantly buy and take for the rest of your life or you'll die. Yeah, right.

 

[DarkWalker]

In any case, the thread is about Bipolar Disorder, not "the ebils of big pharma," so while I'm open to having that debate/discussion, I'd prefer to not sidetrack this thread to do it.

 

[follower]

i think mercola and others, reliable and licensed and proven, have shown that niacin helps a lot (up to 80% according to some studies) of people. it's very safe, inexpensive, and very safe to take under a doctor's supervision (doctor needed mostly to observe, test, and adjust other things being taken that may have substantial side effects).

 

[DarkWalker]

i think mercola and others, reliable and licensed and proven, have shown that niacin helps a lot (up to 80% according to some studies) of people. it's very safe, inexpensive, and very safe to take under a doctor's supervision (doctor needed mostly to observe, test, and adjust other things being taken that may have substantial side effects).

I have found Niacin to be helpful, but not nearly as helpful as fish oil and my medication. My meds do what they're supposed to, but they also throw in nasty side effects as well. I'm going to be talking about some different options with my psych, as well as looking for a different psych.

 

[follower]

cool

footnote: a person with cancer who willingly went through kemo also insisted on taking 3 grams of "C" every day. the doktors said it was a waste of money,
but guess what ----
they didn't suffer any side effects from the drugs, AND the cancer went away..... (they didn't 'admit' it, but i am sure the "C" had more to do with their recovery than the drugs did ---- millions(give or take a few hundred thousand) of testimonies to that effect over the last 75 years, medical and anecdotal)

 

[DarkWalker]

I've heard claims from people that they cured their bipolar disorder with a variety of substances, or with prayer, or what have you. There's only been one I believed, because I had seen her behavior consistently enough. Others have often shown classic signs of mania when they're supposed to be "healed." I'm not saying it can't happen, but my point is: it's amazing what does and doesn't work for certain people.

 

[follower]

remember it's not politically correct to claim to be able to cure anything in the usa. doesn't matter if 100% are cured at a clinic, they are not allowed to make any claims.
so just trust Yhwh and ask Him for direction and keep seeking ---- His Promise is Faithful.
the simple, clean, natural methods are safe to look into and try while you're under a doctor's care. let him note the progress and you can both be amazed if anything actually works, and you don't have to worry about side effects.