I agree with a lot of what you've said, such as showing our love for Jesus by obedience. However I don't think it's that cut and dry for every Christian. At least it isn't for me. To be confident in my hope of salvation and to not worry about it. It's true that God is my greatest hope, and Jesus made it so that we can be close to Him. But well... Too much failure in life shows me that my efforts are often not enough. So the idea of obedience as a means to save ourselves. I have to put my hopes on God more then I do on my ability to stay right. I don't mean that as an excuse. No I mean that as an observation. Here I wrote this a while ago, and I think it places my fears and my hopes a bit more easily.
This was written while after I had gotten out of a depression that happened a few years ago. The issue then was that I worried about people getting sick of my mood, and I was unable to pull myself out if it. The idea of being thrown away still haunts me a bit. Both in this life, and if I'm not careful and in this life, well the fear is just that. Lost patience from God and tossed. Over time the fear has lessened. But it's still there.
Our savior tells us, dear brother, to fear not, for His strength is made perfect in weakness, and that He turns the evil to good, for those who love Him.
We are saved by hope, dear brother, our hope in Christ, that He takes us as we are, to mold us into His image, to hold us in His soul, to redeem us from loss to life, from death to God; for we are loved by God, more than we can now know, for the love of God is beyond imagination--it is His essence, His very nature--God is love; and when He made the world He saw that it was good, and to this day He waits
patiently for the redemption of all of us He foreknew.
Your mistakes cannot undo the power of the cross of Christ--literally the solution to mistakes, and the empowerment to obey: the cross of Christ is not a license to sin, but redemption from sin, in that by His cross we are freed from the penalty of sin, which is death, thus we are, by His grace, alive to give Him praise: like David says,
"If thou, Lord, shouldest mark iniquities, O Lord, who shall stand? But there is forgiveness with thee, that thou mayest be feared." --Psalms 130:2-3
Without the forgiveness of God--which is now to all men by Christ--there would be no one alive to fear Him, nor love Him: remember the flood? it was not without much preaching, and much patience, but when it came, it took them all away. We are approaching times like these, and so shall the end be, as the beginning was, and what has been shall be again...
Don't believe that your mistakes can keep you from God, otherwise, the cross of Christ is without effect, for it is the solution to our fallen state, and by it our hope remains; for it is not by our merit, but by God's grace, and this is through our faith, thus God has made the way, and we, merely need to walk in it.
We cannot earn the grace of God, dear brother, we can only take advantage of it, that is, we can only avail ourselves by His grace, and we can only do it by our faith.
Tho there is much to be said about this, I find that the easiest way for me to be confident in Christ, is by the following:
How we know that we are in Christ is this:
"We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death." --1 John 3:14
Seek to love the brethren, and you will grow in the confidence that is from God, the true faith, that renders doubt to dust, and yields obedience from love. And think of yourself as a child to God, His child, His beloved; then you will correctly perceive, how God sees--He looks at you like a baby trying to walk towards Him: your stumbles and fumbles and falls do not cause Him to despise you, but to help you, so long as you are walking towards Him, He will always be there waiting.
We are like caterpillars, dear brother, eating the tough green leaves while the other worms eat the brittle brown leaves--they live in tunnels, we live in trees, and at the end of our lives, our mystery they'll see--the sons of God, revealed to the world--we were the ones who believed.
Take solace in the sweet hope that makes you free, and is hated by those who can't see: God loves you perfectly--He proved it, He gave you His firstborn Son, --what more could He do to earn your trust.
Keep the faith, dear brother, especially when it looks like everyone else is dropping it.
It's personal--you can now come to God with confidence, through Christ, Who taught you how to love the brethren, and your enemies.
Godspeed, dear brother, and be at peace, knowing that God wanted you before you believed!
May the grace of God abound to you, and may the love of Christ console you; for you are precious to Him, in ways we cannot yet understand.
"What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?" --Psalms 8:4
"Lord, what is man, that thou takest knowledge of him! or the son of man, that thou makest account of him!" --Psalms 144:3
Godspeed, brother, Godspeed.