I feel nothing. I rememer kindness the first day. Now all that seems like a pretense.
If nothing significant happens tomorrow, I might just quit church for good. No point in returning.
I feel empty.
I hope this changes for you, man... you are really on point in your head game, you have a sound mind, you are wise to the movements of the enemy... it's no wonder you are being pressed against.
Don't make a permanent decision based on quick decisions, bro. Sure, leave your church if you must, but look into one that engages you, inspires you, moves you forward. I have been around the block, starting with the churches of Christ, moving on to a long stint with the Orthodox Church, where I went through what YOU are going through, and quit church. I slipped into atheism for a good 5 years (don't say it can't happen), before God drew me back, and I... well... Jethro mentioned it:
Find a Spirit-filled church.
I found a Spirit-filled church. I believe the Spirit of God is not limited, He moves where, when, and how He will, so when I say Spirit-filled church I am not speaking exclusively... I'm speaking of the nature of the church. People who have graduated from "head faith" into "heart faith" and from pew warming to discipleship. Not all of them, sure, but a majority of them. People who are open to the Holy Spirit and His power goes with them. My whole life changed. Been in churches a good 20 years, never knew a thing about being a Christian until I found this church.
I don't think you're in the exact some boat I was. I do think you're an honest to goodness Christian in faith and in works. I know you pray and fast. I know you study to show thyself approved. But I honestly think that you are being uprooted right now, and you need to be planted where He wills it. Not bashing your current church! May they see revival, may they see thousands of souls saved, may they bear much fruit. But that doesn't mean you have to be there. Sometimes we just have to move forward.
YosefHayim, I used to feel that way, too, and I actually did quit going to church. Biggest mistake of my life. We need the fellowship of our brothers and sisters to help us stay strong and focused. Like Jethro said, you need to find another church or confront the staleness of your own church. If they are lukewarm, they need their eyes and hearts opened or you need to leave them.
Do not let others actions/inactions decide the measure of your faith.
I pray to God that you find brothers and sisters who manifest the Spirit and provide you companionship in your walk with Christ.
Solid advice Rick.