Corrupt wishes... funny :)

[Spiffy]

Granted, but your monkey gets his tail cut off, too, this time by getting it caught in the door.



I wish I had a day off

 

[promisedove]

granted but during these 24 hours you are not conscious and are stuck in a nightmare that feels like forever but only last an hour and repeats itself 24 times.

I wish I was a musical genius.

 

[Spiffy]

Granted, but everything you do has to be in beat and in time with the music constantly going off in your head and you can only sing, never to talk normally again.



I wish it were 1999 again

 

[promisedove]

granted but after it has been 1999 for a year you will have to forfeit 20 years of your life or the years will go backwards.....1998, 1997,1996,1995...etc....until you don't exist anymore.

I wish I were a guy.

 

[Spiffy]

Granted, but you are hideous and any normalcy is out, you have to wear a mask everywhere you go because people can not stomach looking at you. You're also a wimp :gah

 

[Spiffy]

Oops....I forgot to ask for a wish





I wish I had a submarine

 

[promisedove]

granted but all of the oceans, rivers, and lakes in the world are dried up and besides the clothes on your back this submarine is all that you own.

I wish I had an hour with Jesus.

 

[Gabe]

Granted, but the Jesus in question is Jesus Argandona, a Mexican businessman who was arrested on smuggling charges.

I wish i were taller.

 

[Caroline H]

Granted, but now you are 2,000 ft tall and alone

I wish I could sing

 

[promisedove]

granted but you can only sing, "Lonely, I'm Mr. lonely, I have nobody, for my own I am so lonely, I´m mr. Lonely I have nobody, for my own I am so lonely".

I wish that I was Korean.

 

[Blazin Bones]

Granted, but you are a zoo attraction on another planet that has been observing earth for quite some time now.

I wish that I had a good slice of Pizza!

 

[promisedove]

granted but through a misterious chain of events involving lightening, a hammer, and a safety pin all food now tastes like poop and all poop tastes like a nice good slice of pizza.

I wish i could predict the future.

 

[Spiffy]

That's digusting



Granted, but now you know what calamities wait, you know exactly how the new world order will come about but there is nothing you can do about it, which drives you completely insane and you spend the rest of your days in a mental institution.


I wish I had some ice cream with a cherry on top

 

[Blazin Bones]

Granted, but you have been put into a special glass holding cell which only allows your hands to hold the Ice cream, but you can not move your hands so you are forced to watch it melt and have cold, wet, sticky hands.

I wish Barack Obama had not been elected President.

 

[promisedove]

granted but Hilary Clinton becomes president instead, need i say more?

I wish I had a Ph.d.

 

[Spiffy]

Granted, but it's in garbage science, you spend so much time with garbage you smell like it now.




I wish I had a horse

 

[Caroline H]

granted but Hilary Clinton becomes president instead, need i say more?

I wish I had a Ph.d.

:toofunny

Granted, but it only has 10 seconds left to live.

I wish I could fly.

 

[Blazin Bones]

To Spiffy: Granted but it's the thug version of Mr Ed. and yes he can use guns...

To Caromurp: Granted but it only fly's you into my arms (I know it's not really that corrupt, but hey...)

I wish I had a new suit

 

[Caroline H]

Granted, but it is a pink rubber suit.
....why did you grant Spiffy's wish again, I already did that

I wish I didn't have so many books to read.

 

[Spiffy]

Granted, but now you have no idea what anyone is talking about and you have to sit in the corner with a dunce hat on.




I wish I had a personal chef