Fellow believers where could I be going wrong as "strong" Female ?

[MerciG777]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie, I respect this description of my being because others can see what we cannot see often.

So I was with this amazing male friend, who seemed to be really into me, I didn't show to much keen back because I thought that put him off, I however was enthusiastic about his presence and would respond unfortunately I am anxious about other things and it shows at times and I get distracted but I am really into him.

He is man after God's heart which I find so attractive, spiritually, physically, mentally and soul wise.

But as of recent he went from being regularly close to not as excitable as when we first crossed paths, it still pretty fresh.

 

[Riven]

Maybe he has a girlfriend? Maybe you're not his type? Maybe he's gay? Maybe he prefers to be single?

Why don't you ask him?

 

[MerciG777]

Maybe he has a girlfriend? Maybe you're not his type? Maybe he's gay? Maybe he prefers to be single?

NOne are relevant

Why don't you ask him?

I should ask him but I don't how to ask man, I have been raised on the idea of movies

 

[Riven]

NOne are relevant

I should ask him but I don't how to ask man, I have been raised on the idea of movies

Just ask him if he wants to get a coffee or something.

 

[Daniel in the Lions’ Den]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie, I respect this description of my being because others can see what we cannot see often.

So I was with this amazing male friend, who seemed to be really into me, I didn't show to much keen back because I thought that put him off, I however was enthusiastic about his presence and would respond unfortunately I am anxious about other things and it shows at times and I get distracted but I am really into him.

He is man after God's heart which I find so attractive, spiritually, physically, mentally and soul wise.

But as of recent he went from being regularly close to not as excitable as when we first crossed paths, it still pretty fresh.

What I have discovered in myself is that I use the word “strong” to describe the fact that I have already dealt with some things which made me this way. I don’t know how this would sound to you—only you know yourself better than anyone, and God knows you best—but try to find a way to talk to him about issues which are important and possibly sensitive for you. If he is a godly man, he will give you sound advice, and he will appreciate these types of discussions. I hope this helps; based on the information you gave and my experiences, this is what I can tell you.

 

[MerciG777]

What I have discovered in myself is that I use the word “strong” to describe the fact that I have already dealt with some things which made me this way. I don’t know how this would sound to you—only you know yourself better than anyone, and God knows you best—but try to find a way to talk to him about issues which are important and possibly sensitive for you. If he is a godly man, he will give you sound advice, and he will appreciate these types of discussions. I hope this helps; based on the information you gave and my experiences, this is what I can tell you.

Thank you this is very helpful. I noticed there maybe a change in his behaviour.

I figured he liked me romantically but I genuinley don't know how to respond, I have done returned with kindness and enthuasim

 

[Hidden In Him]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie, I respect this description of my being because others can see what we cannot see often.

So I was with this amazing male friend, who seemed to be really into me, I didn't show to much keen back because I thought that put him off, I however was enthusiastic about his presence and would respond unfortunately I am anxious about other things and it shows at times and I get distracted but I am really into him.

He is man after God's heart which I find so attractive, spiritually, physically, mentally and soul wise.

But as of recent he went from being regularly close to not as excitable as when we first crossed paths, it still pretty fresh.

Do you share in his beliefs, Merci?

Welcome to CF.net.

 

[Daniel in the Lions’ Den]

Thank you this is very helpful. I noticed there maybe a change in his behaviour.

I figured he liked me romantically but I genuinley don't know how to respond, I have done returned with kindness and enthuasim

Just try to be open with him, especially about what matters to you.

 

[Hidden In Him]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie, I respect this description of my being because others can see what we cannot see often.

So I was with this amazing male friend, who seemed to be really into me, I didn't show to much keen back because I thought that put him off, I however was enthusiastic about his presence and would respond unfortunately I am anxious about other things and it shows at times and I get distracted but I am really into him.

He is man after God's heart which I find so attractive, spiritually, physically, mentally and soul wise.

But as of recent he went from being regularly close to not as excitable as when we first crossed paths, it still pretty fresh.

Since you're not on very much, let me follow up on this before I forget.

If he is truly a man after God's heart, he will want someone he can discuss spiritual things with, and someone he feels relates to what God has and is showing him. Take an interest in what he believes, and in his calling and ministry in life. Unless he has found someone else, that will most certainly get his attention. From there, you can let him know you are interested in him personally, and it will be much better received.

God bless, and wishing you the very best

In Christ Jesus,
Hidden In Him

 

[for_his_glory]

Hi MerciG777

Never be to enthusiastic that you might miss what wasn't really there to begin with. I would think if he was in to you that he would not be drifting away from you. Give it some time as it seems like the two of you have just met recently and really do not know a whole lot about each other other then he being a Christian. If it is meant to be the Holy Spirit will let the both of you know like it was when I first met my husband as I met him in church and we established a friendship first really getting to know as much as we could about each other. It could be that he only wants to be friends and nothing more. Let him take the lead on this and see where it goes.

 

[MerciG777]

Hi MerciG777

Never be to enthusiastic that you might miss what wasn't really there to begin with.

this sounds negative and presumptious. There was definitley a spark there. I would much rather be positive and enthuastic, I am not living in clouds or being delusional.

I would think if he was in to you that he would not be drifting away from you.

I cannot really determind or judge, I say drifting away but he has made the effort to contact when he has free time and will check on me genuinley how I am doing.

Give it some time as it seems like the two of you have just met recently and really do not know a whole lot about each other other then he being a Christian.

Yes exactly fortunatley he has been open & transparent, me too but we haven't had a chance to sit a talk deeply.

If it is meant to be the Holy Spirit will let the both of you know like it was when I first met my husband as I met him in church and we established a friendship first really getting to know as much as we could about each other.

yes we are doing the same atm. But I am curious as I never really thought about this except for bibilical teaching in bible study. Diffferent circumstances as you are both in church.

It could be that he only wants to be friends and nothing more. Let him take the lead on this and see where it goes.

Okay, let God or the man I am curious about.

 

[MerciG777]

Since you're not on very much, let me follow up on this before I forget.

If he is truly a man after God's heart, he will want someone he can discuss spiritual things with, and someone he feels relates to what God has and is showing him.

He has regularly sharing scriptures, encourging me with bibilical practise that applies to us personally.

But maybe he does not. I just need to Gods comfort, strength and ability.

Take an interest in what he believes, and in his calling and ministry in life.

I like this he has shared his interests with me. So I will def love to discuss, I just had a fear of how to go about it.

Unless he has found someone else,

that will most certainly get his attention. From there, you can let him know you are interested in him personally, and it will be much better received.

Are you men or a women how do I approach it as a feminine, meek, gentle women?

God bless, and wishing you the very best

In Christ Jesus,
Hidden In Him

 

[MerciG777]

Do you share in his beliefs, Merci?

Welcome to CF.net.

Yes, very much so. This is why I am so enthuastic about him, one of the first thinga I appreciated was he joy, in sharing and appreciating the gospel. The word of God. He practises and shares scriptures of encourages to me. God bless him.

Just try to be open with him, especially about what matters to you.

I would like that, I am just in a place of fear but I plan too.

 

[Zeth4500]

its very easy, isolate him and tell him that you like him a lot.
either he will say he likes you back, or he wont. many attractive guys dont naturally understand flirting
as for being a tough or strong woman, that is not something to strive for if you want a lasting relationship, it will be unfruitful for the sexual chemistry, relationship dynamics. he will feel insulted and belittled and you will feel defeated if you dont get your power. assuming this is how you naturally feel and its not just a emotional dissocation from, for instance past trauma (which could then be worked around) then you need to find an unleash for your masculine energy- which some women do have and its perfectly fine, as long as you dont try to make the relationship equal or end up trying to make him submit, this would be inversion of gender roles and deliberately satanic

if youre interested i could have some shots at figuring you out a bit more and give some more accurate advice

 

[Tenchi]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie, I respect this description of my being because others can see what we cannot see often.

So I was with this amazing male friend, who seemed to be really into me, I didn't show to much keen back because I thought that put him off, I however was enthusiastic about his presence and would respond unfortunately I am anxious about other things and it shows at times and I get distracted but I am really into him.

He is man after God's heart which I find so attractive, spiritually, physically, mentally and soul wise.

But as of recent he went from being regularly close to not as excitable as when we first crossed paths, it still pretty fresh.

You know, God says what's really important isn't that we are "strong," or "exciting," or a "leader," or "interesting," but that we are like Jesus.

Romans 8:29 (NASB)
29 For those whom God foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren;

2 Corinthians 4:6-11 (NASB)
6 For God, who said, "Light shall shine out of darkness," is the One who has shone in our hearts to give the Light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.
7 But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, so that the surpassing greatness of the power will be of God and not from ourselves;
8 we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing;
9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;
10 always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body.
11 For we who live are constantly being delivered over to death for Jesus' sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh.

As far as God's concerned, we are the best we can possibly when Jesus can be seen clearly in us. I suspect that any godly man encountering a woman in whom Jesus is apparent, would be very strongly attracted to her.

But, of course, it's impossible to pretend to be like Jesus. Doing so is always a disaster because there is nothing, really, of Jesus in a pretense of being like him. No, to be like Jesus we have to be always under the control of the Spirit of Christ, the Holy Spirit, and as we are, he transforms us, making us more and more like Jesus.

1 Peter 5:6 (NASB)
6 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time,

James 4:7,10 (NASB)
7 Submit therefore to God...

10 Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.

Romans 12:1 (NASB)
1 Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.

And when we are made to be like Christ by the Holy Spirit, we become very attractive to almost everyone around us (except those who hate Christ, of course). Anyway, maybe take your eyes of this guy and put them on Jesus, submit yourself daily to the Spirit's control, and as you do and are changed by the Spirit, I think you'll be surprised by how many truly godly guys suddenly find you very interesting.

 

[Hidden In Him]

Are you men or a women how do I approach it as a feminine, meek, gentle women?

Stop worrying about what you are "supposed" to do, and start being yourself.

1. If he likes you, he knows what you are already.
2. If you are going to be happy being married to him, he will have to accept you for who you are.

 

[Hidden In Him]

I would like that, I am just in a place of fear but I plan too.

Spend more time in prayer, worship and study of scripture. These things will bring the Spirit of God upon you, and God has not given us a spirit of fear, but one of Love, Power, and a Sound Mind. If he is a man of God, these things will also attract him as well.

 

[Daniel in the Lions’ Den]

Just try to be open with him, especially about what matters to you.

When I said, “especially what matters to you”, I meant what is important to both of you. Think of why you are important to him, and let him think why he is important to you. This will help both of you, and it will also be good for your friends that you are getting along as in the beginning.

 

[Hidden In Him]

I have told that I am "tough cookie" but as a same time also soft and sweetie

Be advised: Some men like a "tough cookie," because they like the challenge of turning them all soft and gooey and oh so delicious on the inside, provided they can get them into the oven for a little while, and surrounded by a little warmth.

Btw, if you haven't figured out what my gender is yet, my other advice is that you need to be a bit more observant, Lol. Just a heads up : )

 

[Zeth4500]

Be advised: Some men like a "tough cookie," because they like the challenge of turning them all soft and gooey and oh so delicious on the inside, provided they can get them into the oven for a little while, and surrounded by a little warmth.

Btw, if you haven't figured out what my gender is yet, my other advice is that you need to be a bit more observant, Lol. Just a heads up : )

ive charmed my way into many womens hearts and the strongest connections ive had was the ones that resisted me the most. they all deep down want the same thing, reliability, so they make you prove yourself more before they dare to open themselves up. persistence and desire.