Christ_empowered
Member
- Oct 23, 2010
- 14,233
- 10,718
yup. me, yet again. I have -1- neighbor who talks to me, now and then. it seems...some people want me to move. I suspect a lot of it because of what the combo of sin, satan, self, and the world had reduced me to, till I got genuinely saved 9 years ago and really, until Jesus moved -mightily- in my life fairly recently. OK...so...
I had to get a DIY security system...one of those newer, computerized ones they advertise on the TV. My parents caved and got it shortly after $60 in b-day money went missing. ugh. :-(
its a nice, modest place in a low crime area. the deal seems to be....
well, its not -just- that the shrinks, etc. regard me as a "trouble maker," but I think that's part of it. HIV+...test came back over 17 years ago, now. no treatment offered, no referral, nothing. and...yeah...God spared me, now I'm remarkably...healthy. -I recommend treatment, of course- for whatever reason(s), I was treated like I was in some 3rd world dystopia.
criminal stuff...just the 1 thing (serious misdemeanor...) on the record. successfully completed probation with no trouble, they let me off 2 years early. The state agency that does the "official" background checks has it, but reputable private firm doesn't. Thing about that is...the official agency is bad about updating records and such, so it could be cleared or sealed or...obviously, state law is confusing, so...-shrug- at any rate, not a felon, possibly just a sealed conviction. and...
I -just- overheard some lady saying "he needs to -move- " yet again. but...again: I talk to -1- person. Or I should say, the -1- person talks to me, lol. I dunno. I'm a "(high functioning) mental patient, from a good family..." on a good day. Obviously, what Jesus says trumps the world around me every.single.time (just getting that, so its more for me than for y'all, out there...), but...
I dunno. God's timing is perfect. OK. Maybe...moving extra-mightily now that I'm 37 is in part because...I'm 37, lol. too old for the gay community (small southern city, anyway...not as if there's a hopping gay community, lol), too old for drugs and crazy pills, and...
now? at 37, I apparently look 30-32. Not "the fountain of youth" (if only, lol), but it lines up with what I've read in other testimonies that involve physical healing and restoration. cancer (for instance) gone, looking a bit younger, got that glow (LOL). But...OK...
I see my counselor tomorrow. Its...frustrating, because I remember one time, a man was showing a place for sale right next to mine, and he was laughing at and about me, and...
I told my counselor about it, and he straight up said "that's 110% your illness!," and...??? see, I don't doubt that he's well intentioned, but...I was there it happened. but I'm labeled. and if I had said "but...," that's then proof of lack of insight and/or denial and/or....I dunno, bunches of jibber jabber. I just don't see why some people won't simmer down and leave me alone.
I try not to burden my (loving, hard working, kind) parents with all this. They were able and willing -- by His grace, amen -- to get me this place, and they were able to do it -without- a mortgage. Again: modest, not luxe, but nice! and now...
been here less than 4 years, property values up and up. not that its a gold mine (LOL...far from it!), but they've gotten their money's worth over and over again, above and beyond any other investments they've made have paid off. God is Good!
blah. sorry to ramble. I -am- grateful to The Lord and to my (again: loving, kind, long suffering) parents. Ingratitude is less and less of an issue, on the right side of The Cross. Its just...
what is this about, you know? I don't mess with people. People are openly talking about having me committed and junk like that and....whaaa? thankfully, -because- I don't have a felony (although people openly taunt me and say I do...which is strange, because I don't think I could live here, if I hadn't gotten a plea deal...) and because my parents are on the lower rungs of the upper class, and....on and on....
ugh. please...pray for my parents and me, and those who taunt me, speak all matter of evil against me falsely, mock and persecute and plot against me (and probably my family, too), on and on. I'm not so much an "angry mental patient" as I am a blessed and somewhat confused Christian, trying to get what this is all about, why some people seem so openly hostile...maybe somebody doesn't want me living here? mind games...kind of a common thread throughout my life, even before psych "treatment." -ugh-
thanks!
I had to get a DIY security system...one of those newer, computerized ones they advertise on the TV. My parents caved and got it shortly after $60 in b-day money went missing. ugh. :-(
its a nice, modest place in a low crime area. the deal seems to be....
well, its not -just- that the shrinks, etc. regard me as a "trouble maker," but I think that's part of it. HIV+...test came back over 17 years ago, now. no treatment offered, no referral, nothing. and...yeah...God spared me, now I'm remarkably...healthy. -I recommend treatment, of course- for whatever reason(s), I was treated like I was in some 3rd world dystopia.
criminal stuff...just the 1 thing (serious misdemeanor...) on the record. successfully completed probation with no trouble, they let me off 2 years early. The state agency that does the "official" background checks has it, but reputable private firm doesn't. Thing about that is...the official agency is bad about updating records and such, so it could be cleared or sealed or...obviously, state law is confusing, so...-shrug- at any rate, not a felon, possibly just a sealed conviction. and...
I -just- overheard some lady saying "he needs to -move- " yet again. but...again: I talk to -1- person. Or I should say, the -1- person talks to me, lol. I dunno. I'm a "(high functioning) mental patient, from a good family..." on a good day. Obviously, what Jesus says trumps the world around me every.single.time (just getting that, so its more for me than for y'all, out there...), but...
I dunno. God's timing is perfect. OK. Maybe...moving extra-mightily now that I'm 37 is in part because...I'm 37, lol. too old for the gay community (small southern city, anyway...not as if there's a hopping gay community, lol), too old for drugs and crazy pills, and...
now? at 37, I apparently look 30-32. Not "the fountain of youth" (if only, lol), but it lines up with what I've read in other testimonies that involve physical healing and restoration. cancer (for instance) gone, looking a bit younger, got that glow (LOL). But...OK...
I see my counselor tomorrow. Its...frustrating, because I remember one time, a man was showing a place for sale right next to mine, and he was laughing at and about me, and...
I told my counselor about it, and he straight up said "that's 110% your illness!," and...??? see, I don't doubt that he's well intentioned, but...I was there it happened. but I'm labeled. and if I had said "but...," that's then proof of lack of insight and/or denial and/or....I dunno, bunches of jibber jabber. I just don't see why some people won't simmer down and leave me alone.
I try not to burden my (loving, hard working, kind) parents with all this. They were able and willing -- by His grace, amen -- to get me this place, and they were able to do it -without- a mortgage. Again: modest, not luxe, but nice! and now...
been here less than 4 years, property values up and up. not that its a gold mine (LOL...far from it!), but they've gotten their money's worth over and over again, above and beyond any other investments they've made have paid off. God is Good!
blah. sorry to ramble. I -am- grateful to The Lord and to my (again: loving, kind, long suffering) parents. Ingratitude is less and less of an issue, on the right side of The Cross. Its just...
what is this about, you know? I don't mess with people. People are openly talking about having me committed and junk like that and....whaaa? thankfully, -because- I don't have a felony (although people openly taunt me and say I do...which is strange, because I don't think I could live here, if I hadn't gotten a plea deal...) and because my parents are on the lower rungs of the upper class, and....on and on....
ugh. please...pray for my parents and me, and those who taunt me, speak all matter of evil against me falsely, mock and persecute and plot against me (and probably my family, too), on and on. I'm not so much an "angry mental patient" as I am a blessed and somewhat confused Christian, trying to get what this is all about, why some people seem so openly hostile...maybe somebody doesn't want me living here? mind games...kind of a common thread throughout my life, even before psych "treatment." -ugh-
thanks!
