I don't hate God anymore

[Blake]

Maybe staying away from your "old" Christian mindset is what is needed. As others have already suggested, it's quite possible that your old mindset might have been misguided or fogged by religion.

I was an atheist for 5 years after my experience with Orthodoxy. Not speaking ill of it, I just truly wasn't cut out for it. I found my faith again at the end of that 5 year atheist experience in the place I used to make fun of and consider the most delusional, emotionally-driven (which I considered bad), unsound church in the world... a little ol' Pentecostal church that my family went to.

The things I used to strive and pray and try to earn through works and long prayers were given to me at once -- the true presence of the Lord, tears (which I believe are a redemptive manifestation of grace), spiritual resilience... before, I was like a tumbleweed, every wind coming and blowing would take me wherever it wanted to, but now I am more resolute in my faith than I ever have been.

I believe it was the humility of it all. I was proud to think that because of my affiliation with the Church, because of my lengthy prayers and my monastery visits that I was somehow better off, especially better off than those wacky Pentecostals my family went with, shouting in tongues and running down aisles... my pride led me to a fall, and my humbling raised me up. I learned 2 things: God is not bound by the box my personal preferences or even my most honest convictions try to place Him in. And He is one who greatly blesses the meek and humble with His presence.

Maybe it'll be something like that for you too Poet. Or maybe not. God knows.

 

[LovethroughDove]

I'm sorry, I just can't relate to you. I have never hated God. There was a time I didn't know him, but once I figured out exactly who he is......I want to love him every single day of my life!

 

[Malachi]

I don't hate the God of the bible anymore because I have forgiven him.

God fully understands both sides of your attitude. Saul hated God in Christ also. But God and Christ loved him with an everlasting love. Therefore he eventually became "Paul". God (who is Love or Agape) loves you and me regardless of our animosity towards Him. Because of the shed blood of Christ, He has reconciled us to Himself (cancelled the enmity on His side). Now you must cancel the enmity on your side. That requires repentance toward God and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ (Acts 20:21).

Also, "the God of the Bible" is the only one, true, eternal and living God (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit). There are no other gods. Just dumb idols.

 

[poetofparables]

Uh, a slight correction on that. God doesn't create the mist. We do.

I didnt say he did.

 

[poetofparables]

Likewise. There's no way I'll EVER return to that old mindset. I'll leave that absurdity to the millions of people who choose to believe it.

Ok.

 

[poetofparables]

God fully understands both sides of your attitude. Saul hated God in Christ also. But God and Christ loved him with an everlasting love. Therefore he eventually became "Paul". God (who is Love or Agape) loves you and me regardless of our animosity towards Him. Because of the shed blood of Christ, He has reconciled us to Himself (cancelled the enmity on His side). Now you must cancel the enmity on your side. That requires repentance toward God and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ (Acts 20:21).

Also, "the God of the Bible" is the only one, true, eternal and living God (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit). There are no other gods. Just dumb idols.

Yeah.

 

[poetofparables]

I was an atheist for 5 years after my experience with Orthodoxy. Not speaking ill of it, I just truly wasn't cut out for it. I found my faith again at the end of that 5 year atheist experience in the place I used to make fun of and consider the most delusional, emotionally-driven (which I considered bad), unsound church in the world... a little ol' Pentecostal church that my family went to.

The things I used to strive and pray and try to earn through works and long prayers were given to me at once -- the true presence of the Lord, tears (which I believe are a redemptive manifestation of grace), spiritual resilience... before, I was like a tumbleweed, every wind coming and blowing would take me wherever it wanted to, but now I am more resolute in my faith than I ever have been.

I believe it was the humility of it all. I was proud to think that because of my affiliation with the Church, because of my lengthy prayers and my monastery visits that I was somehow better off, especially better off than those wacky Pentecostals my family went with, shouting in tongues and running down aisles... my pride led me to a fall, and my humbling raised me up. I learned 2 things: God is not bound by the box my personal preferences or even my most honest convictions try to place Him in. And He is one who greatly blesses the meek and humble with His presence.

Maybe it'll be something like that for you too Poet. Or maybe not. God knows.

You have to have faith in something, or you'll despair.

 

[Je'di-Rachel]

I don't hate the God of the bible anymore because I have forgiven him.

:amen The One Creator, demisting the minds from the fog that the enemy draws in.
I am reminded of Job, so I will share!
Job 3 v 20-26
“Why is light given to him who is in misery,
and life to the bitter in soul,
who long for death, but it comes not,
and dig for it more than for hidden treasures,
who rejoice exceedingly
and are glad when they find the grave?
Why is light given to a man whose way is hidden,
whom God has hedged in?
For my sighing comes instead of my bread,
and my groanings are poured out like water.
For the thing that I fear comes upon me,
and what I dread befalls me.
I am not at ease, nor am I quiet;
I have no rest, but trouble comes.”

Eliphaz the Temanite speaks: (Job's friend )
(a section of his response) Job 5 v 17-25
“Behold, blessed is the one whom God reproves;
therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty.
For he wounds, but he binds up;
he shatters, but his hands heal.
He will deliver you from six troubles;
in seven no evil shall touch you.
In famine he will redeem you from death,
and in war from the power of the sword.
You shall be hidden from the lash of the tongue,
and shall not fear destruction when it comes.
At destruction and famine you shall laugh,
and shall not fear the beasts of the earth.
For you shall be in league with the stones of the field,
and the beasts of the field shall be at peace with you.
You shall know that your tent is at peace,
and you shall inspect your fold and miss nothing..."

Times where I have rejected the bible and Yahweh the most were the times that he was teaching me the lessons that were the hardest. Hashem never gives up on you c: what He has started in you will be finished. Growing is fun, forgiveness allows us to continue on towards the Light.

 

[poetofparables]

:amen The One Creator, demisting the minds from the fog that the enemy draws in.
I am reminded of Job, so I will share!
Job 3 v 20-26
“Why is light given to him who is in misery,
and life to the bitter in soul,
who long for death, but it comes not,
and dig for it more than for hidden treasures,
who rejoice exceedingly
and are glad when they find the grave?
Why is light given to a man whose way is hidden,
whom God has hedged in?
For my sighing comes instead of my bread,
and my groanings are poured out like water.
For the thing that I fear comes upon me,
and what I dread befalls me.
I am not at ease, nor am I quiet;
I have no rest, but trouble comes.”

Eliphaz the Temanite speaks: (Job's friend )
(a section of his response) Job 5 v 17-25
“Behold, blessed is the one whom God reproves;
therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty.
For he wounds, but he binds up;
he shatters, but his hands heal.
He will deliver you from six troubles;
in seven no evil shall touch you.
In famine he will redeem you from death,
and in war from the power of the sword.
You shall be hidden from the lash of the tongue,
and shall not fear destruction when it comes.
At destruction and famine you shall laugh,
and shall not fear the beasts of the earth.
For you shall be in league with the stones of the field,
and the beasts of the field shall be at peace with you.
You shall know that your tent is at peace,
and you shall inspect your fold and miss nothing..."

Times where I have rejected the bible and Yahweh the most were the times that he was teaching me the lessons that were the hardest. Hashem never gives up on you c: what He has started in you will be finished. Growing is fun, forgiveness allows us to continue on towards the Light.

Rachel if in the minds of christians everything I say and do has to lead back to God, then I never had any freewill to choose to not believe.

 

[Je'di-Rachel]

Rachel if in the minds of christians everything I say and do has to lead back to God, then I never had any freewill to choose to not believe.

I believe you do have freewill. Faith comes when you choose to give your will, freely, over to Messiah, and allow Him to guide you along The Way.
But if you choose not to believe do not be discouraged by Christian brothers and sisters leading you back to The Lord, it is The Shepard calling out through them. 'Cos God Loves you!
:woot