But I'll continue praying to Jesus, the Father, and the Holy Spirit. I'll continue invoking the precious blood and praying for the Angels to help, praying the Lord's prayer, and most of all praying for God's will to be done. At this time God wills there to be much darkness and suffering, so I'll pray for the grace to love that part of God's will as well.
What makes you think that He's not doing His will ln your life?! You prayed for it!
God doesn't promise a good life on earth. He promises suffering, just like Jesus suffered. You got exactly what asked for.
Looky here brother, tribulations and hard times on earth build character, endurance, patience and faith. James 1:2-4, Romans 5:3-4 so this is obviously, essentially a training exercise here on earth for us. To prepare us with the temperament that we will need when in heaven for our job serving Him.
Think of it as special forces training or AIT like in the military. Some don't finish, others are stoic, grit their teeth, one day at a time and overcome the frustrations, to go on to become decorated and get good positions in the outfit.
In Luke 16:19-31 is the story of Lazarus and the rich man. Lazarus was a broken down beggar and had a hard life, so he went to peace, rest, joy and comfort. The rich man had a cushy soft life, so went to torment...
If you speak truth about how bad it is for you...then you have a lot to look forward to!
Hardly anyone meets the Lord on the mountain of prosperity, it's usually down in the valley of the shadow of death, like where you are.
You're prime for visitation or blessings from God in your position...
if you were to stop murmuring. The Lord doesn't like murmuring. Recall the Israelites wandering in the desert for 40 years? Why did God do that to them? Murmuring. Complaining...I kid you not.
Remember, life is 10% what it throws at you...and 90% how you react to it.