Growingsoldier,
First, welcome to the forum! I know that you are hurting and I hope and pray that you will find real help here. But, part of the real help might be some advice to seek out some solid professional counseling.
I too was confused by your post and couldn't put my finger on some inconsistencies. Then I read your other thread here, the one where you shared that your husband decided that he didn't want more children, got a vasectomy, talked you into getting an abortion and has reversed his prior OK to adopt another child.
Frankly, if I had to put up with all that from my husband, I think I would be dreaming about some other guy as well. You asked if it was wrong to want to leave him...without getting into the rightness or wrongness of it, let's just say that it is thoroughly understandable. As is you seeking refuge in fantasy. Fantasy in this case is a lot like drugs or alcohol though...might make you feel better in the short term, but is only compounding your problem. And sister, you truly have a serious problem in your marriage.
However, with God, all things are possible, including the healing of your marriage. Forgiveness will play a big part in any kind of true rebuilding of your marriage. First, you need to ask forgiveness of God for the abortion. True, we women are to submit to our husbands, but not when they pressure us to do something that is outright sinful. And, you need healing so that you can come to terms with killing your unborn child, one that you now so desperately want. While there are some great people here, and we will certainly want to help you and uphold you in prayer...I think a godly professional therapist is in order. I would ask your pastor if he can recommend someone.
Your dissatisfaction in your marriage is very clear to me, having read your other post. And, it goes a long ways towards explaining your husband's anger issues. To have pressured his unwilling wife to kill his child is a sin too great to not have consequences. Consequences that are now affecting his ability to father your child and he seems to be acting out by becoming angry with you, especially when you ask him to help out with your child. I'm sure that his guilt of pressuring you into aborting a child that you wanted very much eats away at him.
I'm wondering if this is an "elephant in the room"? I ask because I find it rather amazing that you would separate the overwhelmingly huge issue of his refusing to allow more children and pressuring you into aborting your second child from this issue of your husband no longer being attractive to you. If the abortion and the issue of your desiring more children are things that the two of you cannot discuss or address, then it will be very difficult to move forward in your marriage.
You didn't say whether or not your husband is a Christian. If he is not, and if he refuses to go through some counseling with you regarding the abortion and your desire for more children, and if he desires a divorce, unfortunately, that might be your only recourse. If so, there is nothing unbiblical about letting him divorce you.
But, for your child's sake, I hope that the two of you can work through this and rebuild your marriage, forgive past sins and come to unity in the issue of more children.