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my situation

hadron

Member
So, right off the bat, I have a pregnant gf. I'm reading the criteria for the board and I'm not completely sure how well that fits, though we are also semi engaged.

Since I have converted I have been thinking about this situation in light of trying to live the right sort of life by these new sets of rules. My gf is a christian, though, somewhat of a lapsed one. I think she sincerely believes but has let it go for the last couple of years due to some circumstances. I feel good about marrying her, but I have to admit, this situation has presented itself as a struggle in my new faith.

Advice on facing temptation is appreciated. Also, I want to start our married life together on the strongest terms possible and if there are things that married people could advise that way I'd appreciate that too.
 
First and foremost, ask God to lend a hand. He will guide you in the direction that is best for you to take. Secondly, talk to your girl friend. Maybe ask her if she will participate with you in the growing of your faith. Read the bible together, talk about what a certain book in the bible means to you, and how you can apply that to your faith.

At the least, read about what marriage means to God. Maybe you could read that with your girlfriend as well. I know it can be difficult, especially when dating someone who may not have as much faith as yourself. Like I said, the best thing you can hope for, is that she agrees to grow in faith with you. That will be the binding of your marriage. God will insure your success as long as you are working through him.
 
Before you marry, you really need to discuss Christ with her and explain that you fully intend to be a Christian family, pursuing Christ everyday. You say that she's fallen behind in her faith the last few years...make sure you are on the same page with her before you get married. Christ is what makes a sturdy, healthy marriage, and it will be even sturdier if she has returned to Christ before you marry.

I suggest getting a Pastor you know and trust to take you through marital counciling. If you can't afford that, at least talk with her about things like religion before you say your vows, and make sure that you are honest about what kind of marriage you want.
 
Thanks for the advice. From the feedback I've gotten from her, she's been re-energized by my unexpected conversion and seems to be excited to pursue that with me. I think she felt before like she'd gotten herself in somewhat of an impossible or difficult position and that maybe God has made a way for her, which I think he has. I agree about the open communication and so far I think that's going well.

It's definitely something to read and pray about. We're doing some looking around at churches so I'm not sure at what point we'll be in a position to know who we want to seek that kind of counseling from, and we don't want to wait too long, so I'll give that some thought.
 
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