Parents won't allow you to date?

[Blazin Bones]

Has anyone ever been through a parent not allowing them to date a certain person or not date at all? What are some issues that come about from this stance?

 

[NestForASparrow]

Well my parents actually encourage me to date, but were reluctant to allow me to date or marry out of my race....problem for me is I did not meet many women within my race since leaving for college. After college, I did go home for a few months, but I did not feel at home.

I had to play hardball to get my mother off this stance. In the end, it may be easier to marry a woman of my race (similar values, culture, food, language etc), but that the woman God knows who is best for me to marry is not of my same race.

So the Bible does say to honor one's parents, but in the end, it all matters what our Father wants us to do.

 

[minetonight]

I've only dated one guy, and my parents respected him and liked him. I was fifteen when we started dating, and we broke up after 10 months when I was 16. They have never told me I can't date anyone, because they realize that is counter productive and they mostly trust my judgement.

 

[Nick]

they mostly trust my judgement.

That's good and bad. Hopefully they trust your judgement for good reason, ie hopefully you're a good person to trust. But I would ultimately trust God with something like this - both you and your parents.

So the Bible does say to honor one's parents, but in the end, it all matters what our Father wants us to do.

My sentiments exactly. Not always the easiest thing to do, but definately the best.

Matthew 7:13-14:
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

 

[LaMexicana]

I think one of my parent's mistakes was to make everything taboo...including dating or even talking about it. Instead of explaining things to us (or trusting us in general), they made us feel ashamed of pretty much everything we did. For being a very conservative, born again family we're pretty screwed up.

I'm not going to put all the blame on them but I think because they kept us so locked up without explanation, both my sister and I ended up pregnant out of wedlock (she ended up in divorce and my daughter doesn't have a dad at all) and my bro is currently living with his girlfriend which I think will end up in another out of wedlock pregnancy.

If you're not going to allow your kids to do stuff, give them a good explanation. We were never told why we couldn't date, why we shouldn't have sex, why we should respect ourselves...so on and so forth. We were just condemned any time a taboo subject was brought up or questioned.

Now that I have a daughter, she will know what is and isn't acceptable and why! None of this shame/taboo stuff.

 

[Pard]

Never dated anyone, so I have no clue how my parents would take it, though I suppose they would be fine with it, since I have gone to prom with a date before and gone to movies with girls and they didn't mind, but I'd never consider these things dates.

The reason I have never dated someone is because I feel dating is only a means to an end (i.e. marriage) and I have never found but two girls I would have considered the remotest chance of marring (not that I can know, but most girls in public high school are superficial and maybe one in 100 are Christian...).

I do not see dating as bad, so long as the kid knows the guidelines, and in my case I not only know the guidelines, I shoot well below them, just to be safe.