Pedophiles

[walter]

I see there is some talk of pedophiles here and I'd just like to point something out. I know this topic is distasteful, especially with parents, of which I am one, but please, hear me out.

Sin is sin but we all know some sin is too unimaginable and we have a very hard time dealing with it. I would ask you all to consider what you may be inadvertantly doing by speaking as if pedophiles are outside of God's plan for redemption.

How easy do you think it would be for someone (men AND women are afflicted with this sin despite what you've heard in the media) to come forward to seek help if all they ever hear is how horrible and vile they are? Do you not consider that perhaps they are more than aware of their state and have struggled with it for most of their lives? Do you not consider that by us creating such a hostile atmosphere toward them that they become angry, hopeless and give up trying to defeat it?

Have you ever thought about our role (society) in this sin? You can go for treatment for just about anything and people will tell you you are "courageous". About the only way for a pedophile to get treatment is to be arrested and found guilty of the crime. Why does he or she have to offend before he or she can get treatment?

Perhaps if we weren't so damning in the first place a person would feel safe coming forward and asking for help before they offend. We, though, feel like statements such as "He should have his **** cut off!" or "He should be shot on the spot!" are ok and not the least hard hearted.

What do you think Jesus would say? He DID say the only sin that won't be forgiven is balspheming the Holy Spirit.

 

[jasoncran]

you aren't the only who thought here on this forum, yes i'm glad doesn't judge the way we do, if he did i wouldnt be saved

jason

 

[walter]

I think the church has really dropped the ball on this one. I am glad to hear it has been discussed here before.

 

[jasoncran]

I think the church has really dropped the ball on this one. I am glad to hear it has been discussed here before.

what i meant was that i was thinking about that issue recently to my knowledge it's never been discussed and how does the church proceed

jason

 

[walter]

Ah! I see!

Well then, I hope we can discuss it here. Maybe though people should really think before they post here. This topic could get really nasty really fast and it will test some of us. I think it is worth discussing.

 

[Kelli]

I would like to tell you about my dad. He was a very funny man, he had funny sayings like...

When I would ask for a nickle, he would say, Kelli if it took a nickle to go around the world, I wouldn't have enough to get out of site.

Or when he had been sick and someone would ask, "how are you feeling" and He would say, well the first day I thought I was going to die, the second day I was wishing I would and the third day I was glad I didn't.

My dad was severely abused as a child. He had ADD and difficulties in school, his mother was a bully (who knows what kind of childhood she had) But my dad had another bully. It was himself. He hated himself every moment of every day. He wouldn't go to my programs at school because he said he was too ugly and I would be embarrassed of him.

My dad was a pedophile, and it damaged me beyond anything man could fix. Now that I am grown I can kind of work out what he was thinking, because he would say things that would imply that I enjoyed what he was doing, or like it was a date... Let me tell you here and now if anyone out there is a pedophile and you are fooling yourself into thinking your victim somehow likes what is happening... they don't! but I am sure that's how he rationalized it.

While healing I went through stages, the first one was when I felt sorry for him, because he would say he was sorry.

The second one was anger... how could anyone hurt an innocent child just to get his jollies!!!! (I still get mad when I think of that one) this is the stage where I wanted him to rot in hell.

The third stage was I couldn't care less what happened to him. He died and I could think about it all dispassionately. I didn't care if he was in heaven and I didn't care if he was in hell. I just didn't care.

And the final stage is now. I pray with all my heart my dad is in heaven. I can't wait until I can run up and give him a big old "HEALTHY" hug.

I can think of him as my dad now and not just a pedophile, but a funny, sad, depressed, good but sick man.

I think people get angry at anyone who hurts an innocent child. Children are so trusting and forgiving, they blame themselves. But thank God Jesus can see why they do what they do.

Love, Kelli

 

[GojuBrian]

Kelli,

God bless you and thank you for sharing.

 

[JoJo]

And the final stage is now. I pray with all my heart my dad is in heaven. I can't wait until I can run up and give him a big old "HEALTHY" hug.

I can think of him as my dad now and not just a pedophile, but a funny, sad, depressed, good but sick man.

Kelli, it sounds like you have experienced God's healing. What an awesome testimony. Praise the Lord!

 

[walter]

And the final stage is now. I pray with all my heart my dad is in heaven. I can't wait until I can run up and give him a big old "HEALTHY" hug.

I can think of him as my dad now and not just a pedophile, but a funny, sad, depressed, good but sick man.

Kelli, it sounds like you have experienced God's healing. What an awesome testimony. Praise the Lord!

Yes Kelli, Thank you. I feel for you as I was abused too, but I now can look back and try to understand my father. A lot of his removing himself from my life may have been to spare me as much as he could.
I don't mean to minimize what you or anyone else went through and is still going through but please, let's stick to the point of this thread. The pedophile him or herself.

Does God love them any less?
Does it sadden God that we can't reach out to these people?

 

[Lance_Iguana]

I think a big problem with modern society, not just the Church mind you all, is that most media can't seem to separate the Act of Child Molestation and Pedophilia.

Its Horrible when A child is molested and it dose happen from some pedophiles. Though, just like any other odd fetish group, not all pedophiles are child molesters, and not all Child molesters are pedophiles. Most child molestation cases are out of power and not attraction, since rape in general is a power oriented act.

It is horrible what happens to children that fall victim to a child molester, but its just as horrible for people who try there best to not fall into temptation be turned into monsters when they haven't even committed the crime.

 

[Nick]

The pedophile him or herself.

Does God love them any less?

No, I don't think so. They are still sinning as we do, and sin is sin.

Does it sadden God that we can't reach out to these people?

Yes, I would imagine so.

 

[Kelli]

Yes Kelli, Thank you. I feel for you as I was abused too, but I now can look back and try to understand my father. A lot of his removing himself from my life may have been to spare me as much as he could.
I don't mean to minimize what you or anyone else went through and is still going through but please, let's stick to the point of this thread. The pedophile him or herself.

Does God love them any less?
Does it sadden God that we can't reach out to these people?

Yes I did wander off a bit, but what I was trying to get at is, pedophiles are hurting people, but I was also trying to point out why people have such a hard time reaching out to them, because of the devastation they cause. I'm sorry I thought the question of weather or not it was an unforgivable sin, was a rhetorical one. Of coarse we all know that God loves us all, and sin is sin, one little tiny sin can keep you from heaven.

How easy do you think it would be for someone (men AND women are afflicted with this sin despite what you've heard in the media) to come forward to seek help if all they ever hear is how horrible and vile they are? Do you not consider that perhaps they are more than aware of their state and have struggled with it for most of their lives? Do you not consider that by us creating such a hostile atmosphere toward them that they become angry, hopeless and give up trying to defeat it?

When you say has the church has dropped the ball, I always think if God lays something on your heart like that, Then he wants YOU to do something about it. When I was on the staff at a church, many times people would talk to the pastor and elders, about a need they saw in the church. They would say, “What this church needs is ______.†Wondering why the Pastor didn’t do _______. Listen if you see a need in the church, that’s God’s way of telling you He wants you to do something about it. When he lays something on your heart, he doesn't necessarily lay it on other peoples hearts.

I personally don't feel the desire to minister or be in a ministry to help pedophiles, (not that I wouldn't if God brought someone my way). Nor do I think they are unlovable, (that's what I was trying to say in my post) They are not only pedophiles, but hurting people.

Love, Kelli

 

[jasoncran]

my sister was molested by an a pedophile ,she waited tool long to tell mom and dad , and no charges were brought up as there was not enough evidence to convict. Most of us in my family have forgiven that man as he was a alcoholic as well, my sister hasn't come to the point of forgiving him, pray that she does for her sake(spiritually)

jason

 

[walter]

Thank you all for your responses. I know this is a painful subject.
I will be out for a bit but I will return to post again.