Christ_empowered
Member
yes, yes; me, yet again. ugh.
on the plus side, I went out on a little trip with mama today. I don't...know, honestly, what to make of the situation. my parents are -good to me- and they certainly do not have to be. I praise The Lord for His Love and mercy!
I guess because I was with my mother, no one yelled at me or talked at a normal level, just...yeah. yeah. "that's how we really feel about him," etc. thing is...
I cannot move. I have moved, my psych records and other junk followed me. Now, I'm 37. move? where? I mean, then I'd be obviously unemployed, no family nearby, and...yeah. extra-bad news. at least here, my parents are kind to me and I think I'm safe and all, its just...
ugh. I lean towards antipsychiatry, right? I mean...let me qualify that. In Christ, I see that the mental health industry is often evil, at times straight up demonic...
but its just a huge, evil industry in the midst of a fallen, sin marred and scarred world. so, now...in Christ...I'm not really antipsychiatry so much as I am thoroughly disillusioned. none of it is real or valid or even helpful, at least...not for most "patients," anyway. escape? this side of Heaven? ugh. maybe one reason The Lord has moved so mightily in my life and my parents' lives is because...in my case...
I don't see a true, real 'escape...' there is no EXIT sign from the labels and such in my life that I can see, now...
but -with- His work in their lives and my life, I can at least bear up under it, and lean into Jesus, more and more (albeit imperfectly, obviously).
trying to pray more, praying for faith and hope and love...
because, now...sometimes, I get more down, or at least down in different ways, than in the past. nothing "crazy" or anything, just...
pariah life. ugh. my sins alone were enough to destroy a couple of people, so I get that, but...
God did spare me and those around me and I did come to truly know Jesus and I have been truly changed, forgiven, and...
what to do, now? where to go? I'll pray on it...I do, anyway...its just quite frustrating, the under the breath insults from workers at the local wal mart and the condescending comments from old ladies when I'm looking for my dandruff shampoo, and...
ugh. prayers, please. I know, yet again. thanks.
on the plus side, I went out on a little trip with mama today. I don't...know, honestly, what to make of the situation. my parents are -good to me- and they certainly do not have to be. I praise The Lord for His Love and mercy!
I guess because I was with my mother, no one yelled at me or talked at a normal level, just...yeah. yeah. "that's how we really feel about him," etc. thing is...
I cannot move. I have moved, my psych records and other junk followed me. Now, I'm 37. move? where? I mean, then I'd be obviously unemployed, no family nearby, and...yeah. extra-bad news. at least here, my parents are kind to me and I think I'm safe and all, its just...
ugh. I lean towards antipsychiatry, right? I mean...let me qualify that. In Christ, I see that the mental health industry is often evil, at times straight up demonic...
but its just a huge, evil industry in the midst of a fallen, sin marred and scarred world. so, now...in Christ...I'm not really antipsychiatry so much as I am thoroughly disillusioned. none of it is real or valid or even helpful, at least...not for most "patients," anyway. escape? this side of Heaven? ugh. maybe one reason The Lord has moved so mightily in my life and my parents' lives is because...in my case...
I don't see a true, real 'escape...' there is no EXIT sign from the labels and such in my life that I can see, now...
but -with- His work in their lives and my life, I can at least bear up under it, and lean into Jesus, more and more (albeit imperfectly, obviously).
trying to pray more, praying for faith and hope and love...
because, now...sometimes, I get more down, or at least down in different ways, than in the past. nothing "crazy" or anything, just...
pariah life. ugh. my sins alone were enough to destroy a couple of people, so I get that, but...
God did spare me and those around me and I did come to truly know Jesus and I have been truly changed, forgiven, and...
what to do, now? where to go? I'll pray on it...I do, anyway...its just quite frustrating, the under the breath insults from workers at the local wal mart and the condescending comments from old ladies when I'm looking for my dandruff shampoo, and...
ugh. prayers, please. I know, yet again. thanks.