Same-sex attraction - People who have had experience with it this is your thread (maybe)

[PrimFinallyFoundGod!]

You can DM me instead of replying to the thread if you don't like to reveal your past before God.

I'm young I'm only 20 and I'm having a situation that I'm finding really confusing and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll explain but I posted in here specifically as it isn't a debate section so I really don't want people debating my experience or trying to confuse me further.

I have to ask here because a quick google search will show you how biased everywhere else is.

I'm a lesbian and here is a link to my story if you are interested in the details: https://christianforums.net/threads...exuality-my-experience-being-a-lesbian.96109/

Basically. I'm starting to notice that I appear to be having some kind of OPPOSITE sex attraction. I have literally never had these before and I do still have same-sex attraction as well.

I THINK I prayed to God a few days ago to help me with my same-sex attraction but it was either A. a dream or B. I was so exhausted I don't remember much about it.

And past few days I have noticed this.

I don't really have a desire to be straight, I just don't want to feel like I do when I see beautiful women (mystified at their beauty basically and some mildly impure thoughts), so I am definitely not biased or trying to consciously create opposite-sex attraction. I just find it utterly controllable when I see a beautiful woman and I feel this weird thing/urge in my heart because they are so beautiful and I just want to calm that down better as to me, that is lust even though the thoughts aren't entirely sexual.

Am I bisexual just more gay inclined and I'm only just realizing? Is God REMOVING the gay????? Am I just having another mental breakdown where I lose sense of my identity that will go away very quickly??? I don't know what is going on with me and we are living in times where I LITERALLY do not have anywhere to turn to about this. But I do remember a few people from my homosexuality thread (linked above) who talked about how they USED to have same-sex inclination, so maybe there is someone here who has had this experience when becoming a Christian or just more committed to God??

Society today would say one of two things. I am bisexual and in denial (which is what they already say when I say I'm gay but with a guy. Despite me never having desires or even attraction to male or anything male)

Or that I am becoming brainwashed my Christianity and subconsciously trying to force myself straight, and that I am a sad victim to that circumstance and should just "stop it" and do what I want because "YOLO"

Please don't debate my feelings, experiences or relationship (we got engaged yesterday so) this section is not debate which is why I'm posting here.

What I'm HOPING is someone will have had this experience and won't BS me or make assumptions for me. I'm looking for someone who KNOWS.

If noone relates then I guess I'm having another breakdown where I forget who I am which tbh is very possible because I started dissociating really heavily after my proposal

I'm confused, very impartial, very honest and did I say confused?

It is funny I feel a bit like I'm having a gay revelation in reverse as I have the confusion and even shame/embarrassment... this goes against everything society says about LGBTQ

I think what confuses me even more is people who are religious don't even think this is possible (again biased google search) as they said God CAN remove gay but he doesn't do this because you are supposed to resist the urges.

Is the devil trying to confuse/sway me???

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be on this forum having the mental health issues I do because I'm just "making myself look nutty" which I lowkey am lol I think I'm having a dissociative breakdown but I do not know...

If I am I REALLY hope there is medication or some kind of fix for dissociation because I cannot go on like this. I can't.

Please be kind.

 

[Highway54]

You can DM me instead of replying to the thread if you don't like to reveal your past before God.

I'm young I'm only 20 and I'm having a situation that I'm finding really confusing and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll explain but I posted in here specifically as it isn't a debate section so I really don't want people debating my experience or trying to confuse me further.

I have to ask here because a quick google search will show you how biased everywhere else is.

I'm a lesbian and here is a link to my story if you are interested in the details: https://christianforums.net/threads...exuality-my-experience-being-a-lesbian.96109/

Basically. I'm starting to notice that I appear to be having some kind of OPPOSITE sex attraction. I have literally never had these before and I do still have same-sex attraction as well.

I THINK I prayed to God a few days ago to help me with my same-sex attraction but it was either A. a dream or B. I was so exhausted I don't remember much about it.

And past few days I have noticed this.

I don't really have a desire to be straight, I just don't want to feel like I do when I see beautiful women (mystified at their beauty basically and some mildly impure thoughts), so I am definitely not biased or trying to consciously create opposite-sex attraction. I just find it utterly controllable when I see a beautiful woman and I feel this weird thing/urge in my heart because they are so beautiful and I just want to calm that down better as to me, that is lust even though the thoughts aren't entirely sexual.

Am I bisexual just more gay inclined and I'm only just realizing? Is God REMOVING the gay????? Am I just having another mental breakdown where I lose sense of my identity that will go away very quickly??? I don't know what is going on with me and we are living in times where I LITERALLY do not have anywhere to turn to about this. But I do remember a few people from my homosexuality thread (linked above) who talked about how they USED to have same-sex inclination, so maybe there is someone here who has had this experience when becoming a Christian or just more committed to God??

Society today would say one of two things. I am bisexual and in denial (which is what they already say when I say I'm gay but with a guy. Despite me never having desires or even attraction to male or anything male)

Or that I am becoming brainwashed my Christianity and subconsciously trying to force myself straight, and that I am a sad victim to that circumstance and should just "stop it" and f*ck women and do what I want because "YOLO"

Please don't debate my feelings, experiences or relationship (we got engaged yesterday so) this section is not debate which is why I'm posting here.

What I'm HOPING is someone will have had this experience and won't BS me or make assumptions for me. I'm looking for someone who KNOWS.

If noone relates then I guess I'm having another breakdown where I forget who I am which tbh is very possible because I started dissociating really heavily after my proposal

I'm confused, very impartial, very honest and did I say confused?

It is funny I feel a bit like I'm having a gay revelation in reverse as I have the confusion and even shame/embarrassment... this goes against everything society says about LGBTQ

I think what confuses me even more is people who are religious don't even think this is possible (again biased google search) as they said God CAN remove gay but he doesn't do this because you are supposed to resist the urges.

Is the devil trying to confuse/sway me???

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be on this forum having the mental health issues I do because I'm just "making myself look nutty" which I lowkey am lol I think I'm having a dissociative breakdown but I do not know...

If I am I REALLY hope there is medication or some kind of fix for dissociation because I cannot go on like this. I can't.

Please be kind.

With our imperfection, many are drawn to individuals of both sexes, but God does not judge on that, He judges upon action. No one has to act inappropriately with others, that is a choice.

 

[JLB]

You can DM me instead of replying to the thread if you don't like to reveal your past before God.

I'm young I'm only 20 and I'm having a situation that I'm finding really confusing and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll explain but I posted in here specifically as it isn't a debate section so I really don't want people debating my experience or trying to confuse me further.

I have to ask here because a quick google search will show you how biased everywhere else is.

I'm a lesbian and here is a link to my story if you are interested in the details: https://christianforums.net/threads...exuality-my-experience-being-a-lesbian.96109/

Basically. I'm starting to notice that I appear to be having some kind of OPPOSITE sex attraction. I have literally never had these before and I do still have same-sex attraction as well.

I THINK I prayed to God a few days ago to help me with my same-sex attraction but it was either A. a dream or B. I was so exhausted I don't remember much about it.

And past few days I have noticed this.

I don't really have a desire to be straight, I just don't want to feel like I do when I see beautiful women (mystified at their beauty basically and some mildly impure thoughts), so I am definitely not biased or trying to consciously create opposite-sex attraction. I just find it utterly controllable when I see a beautiful woman and I feel this weird thing/urge in my heart because they are so beautiful and I just want to calm that down better as to me, that is lust even though the thoughts aren't entirely sexual.

Am I bisexual just more gay inclined and I'm only just realizing? Is God REMOVING the gay????? Am I just having another mental breakdown where I lose sense of my identity that will go away very quickly??? I don't know what is going on with me and we are living in times where I LITERALLY do not have anywhere to turn to about this. But I do remember a few people from my homosexuality thread (linked above) who talked about how they USED to have same-sex inclination, so maybe there is someone here who has had this experience when becoming a Christian or just more committed to God??

Society today would say one of two things. I am bisexual and in denial (which is what they already say when I say I'm gay but with a guy. Despite me never having desires or even attraction to male or anything male)

Or that I am becoming brainwashed my Christianity and subconsciously trying to force myself straight, and that I am a sad victim to that circumstance and should just "stop it" and do what I want because "YOLO"

Please don't debate my feelings, experiences or relationship (we got engaged yesterday so) this section is not debate which is why I'm posting here.

What I'm HOPING is someone will have had this experience and won't BS me or make assumptions for me. I'm looking for someone who KNOWS.

If noone relates then I guess I'm having another breakdown where I forget who I am which tbh is very possible because I started dissociating really heavily after my proposal

I'm confused, very impartial, very honest and did I say confused?

It is funny I feel a bit like I'm having a gay revelation in reverse as I have the confusion and even shame/embarrassment... this goes against everything society says about LGBTQ

I think what confuses me even more is people who are religious don't even think this is possible (again biased google search) as they said God CAN remove gay but he doesn't do this because you are supposed to resist the urges.

Is the devil trying to confuse/sway me???

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be on this forum having the mental health issues I do because I'm just "making myself look nutty" which I lowkey am lol I think I'm having a dissociative breakdown but I do not know...

If I am I REALLY hope there is medication or some kind of fix for dissociation because I cannot go on like this. I can't.

Please be kind.

One thing you can always count on is...

The Lord passionatly loves you.

He desires for you to draw near to Him and be close to Him, as a Bridegroom passionatly loves and desires His bride.

Please dont ever forget that.


For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Ephesians 5:31-32




JLB

 

[Free]

I do not know your struggle, but here are some Christians who do. I’m not sure if you have heard of Rosaria Butterfield, but maybe reading her story or one of her books may help (The Gospel Comes with a House Key is about something else):

https://rosariabutterfield.com/

She has a number of resources. You may also want to look at:

https://samallberry.com/

https://www.becketcook.com/

https://christopheryuan.com/

One area where all Christians continually fail is in keeping Jesus as the centre of of our lives. He should be the one we seek above all else, as all the love, acceptance, and joy we will ever need are found in him. But our flesh and Satan leave us chasing everything but Jesus. More than anything, the devil wants to lead you astray (Ephesians 6:10-18; 1 Peter 5:6-8), but God loves you more than you can know and wants you to grow spiritually.

 

[for_his_glory]

I could not possibly understand your struggle, but what I might be seeing which is just my opinion, is the struggle is between you, the world (Gay community) and trying to be closer to God wanting to please Him.

I have gay Nieces and cousins and they know that as me being a child of God I am very much against the physical actions they have chosen, yes chosen. The scriptures in Leviticus 20:10-21 and Romans 1:18-32 that I have already given you showing you this is an abomination to God I do want to say I do not hate gays, but love and pray for them/you.

Here is something that you might want to do in helping yourself. The questions are are asking, write them down and then try to seek your answers in the scriptures by googling your questions and finding out what the word of God says. I see you are very conflicted in your feelings right now and the joy you have in marrying a man you love dearly.

Is it God's Holy Spirit working in you to help change you to be obedient to His commandments as you want to please Him, possibly. You have taken that first step in becoming a Christian (child of God) and the second step is that you have abstained from having sex with other women, even though you find them beautiful and it seems you struggle in your thoughts about having sex with them. There is nothing wrong with seeing another woman or even a male being very attractive, but if you are lusting after them then that is where the sin of lust comes into play with your mind.

As you have already seen by bringing these struggles into a Christian forum you are going to receive oppositions, but yet this should be a safe place for you to talk about these things seeking the help you need. One thing I would also ask of you, and please do not get upset about this but to understand what I am about to say. You need to stop labeling yourself as a "gay" Christian as does God come first in your life ( I am a Christian) or does the gay lifestyle (even though you abstain), come first in your life (I am gay). Just want you to think about that. Should one call themself a druggy Christian, an alcoholic Christian or even a porno Christian, no, as you are either a Christian first and foremost, but you struggle with these types of things seeking help from God.

I know many can be brutes about this subject and come against you, but it's because they have no understanding of what another is dealing with or seeking help with as it takes time to get it all figured out. I pray you take this to Jesus and just sit with Him talking this all out with Him as Jesus will always give us the right answers if we are truly giving Him enough time allowing Him to speak to us.

 

[Riven]

You can DM me instead of replying to the thread if you don't like to reveal your past before God.

I'm young I'm only 20 and I'm having a situation that I'm finding really confusing and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll explain but I posted in here specifically as it isn't a debate section so I really don't want people debating my experience or trying to confuse me further.

I have to ask here because a quick google search will show you how biased everywhere else is.

I'm a lesbian and here is a link to my story if you are interested in the details: https://christianforums.net/threads...exuality-my-experience-being-a-lesbian.96109/

Basically. I'm starting to notice that I appear to be having some kind of OPPOSITE sex attraction. I have literally never had these before and I do still have same-sex attraction as well.

I THINK I prayed to God a few days ago to help me with my same-sex attraction but it was either A. a dream or B. I was so exhausted I don't remember much about it.

And past few days I have noticed this.

I don't really have a desire to be straight, I just don't want to feel like I do when I see beautiful women (mystified at their beauty basically and some mildly impure thoughts), so I am definitely not biased or trying to consciously create opposite-sex attraction. I just find it utterly controllable when I see a beautiful woman and I feel this weird thing/urge in my heart because they are so beautiful and I just want to calm that down better as to me, that is lust even though the thoughts aren't entirely sexual.

Am I bisexual just more gay inclined and I'm only just realizing? Is God REMOVING the gay????? Am I just having another mental breakdown where I lose sense of my identity that will go away very quickly??? I don't know what is going on with me and we are living in times where I LITERALLY do not have anywhere to turn to about this. But I do remember a few people from my homosexuality thread (linked above) who talked about how they USED to have same-sex inclination, so maybe there is someone here who has had this experience when becoming a Christian or just more committed to God??

Society today would say one of two things. I am bisexual and in denial (which is what they already say when I say I'm gay but with a guy. Despite me never having desires or even attraction to male or anything male)

Or that I am becoming brainwashed my Christianity and subconsciously trying to force myself straight, and that I am a sad victim to that circumstance and should just "stop it" and do what I want because "YOLO"

Please don't debate my feelings, experiences or relationship (we got engaged yesterday so) this section is not debate which is why I'm posting here.

What I'm HOPING is someone will have had this experience and won't BS me or make assumptions for me. I'm looking for someone who KNOWS.

If noone relates then I guess I'm having another breakdown where I forget who I am which tbh is very possible because I started dissociating really heavily after my proposal

I'm confused, very impartial, very honest and did I say confused?

It is funny I feel a bit like I'm having a gay revelation in reverse as I have the confusion and even shame/embarrassment... this goes against everything society says about LGBTQ

I think what confuses me even more is people who are religious don't even think this is possible (again biased google search) as they said God CAN remove gay but he doesn't do this because you are supposed to resist the urges.

Is the devil trying to confuse/sway me???

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be on this forum having the mental health issues I do because I'm just "making myself look nutty" which I lowkey am lol I think I'm having a dissociative breakdown but I do not know...

If I am I REALLY hope there is medication or some kind of fix for dissociation because I cannot go on like this. I can't.

Please be kind.

As I said, Prim, I think it is biological. I feel that same attraction when I see a beautiful woman. I don't believe God can change is in a biological sense. We are what we are for better or worse.

It's possible you could be attracted to both sexes with a preference for women. With bisexual people, it's rarely ever 50/50.

I don't know how I can help you with this because I can't change what you are. However, I don't believe that God is so callous as to condemn for something you have no control over.

As such, I question what this denial of one's own bilogical urges will do to a person's mental state in the long-term. It just doesn't seem healthy to me.

 

[D-D-W]

Prim - I congratulate you for your honesty and openness.

My take on SSA (same sex attraction) is that it is a byproduct of living in a fallen world. Romans 8 tells us that all creation groans as if in childbirth because it was subjected to "futility." It is why we have sickness, wars, racial strife, etc. We have all inherited an addiction to sinning from our ancestors. That manifests itself in different ways in different people.

The good news is Christ died to redeem us from the curse and effects of sin. Not just the eternal consequences (torment in hell) but temporal consequences as well. And thru the power of the Holy Spirit we can resist sinning in this life. (not that we will ever be perfect in that regard) But we can keep getting better and better.

I read in your OP that you were starting to feel straight hetero attractions. That is good and it is GOD. I also read you recently got engaged to be married. CONGRATS!!!!! Having regular satisfying hetero sex will help rewire your brain into a more hetero orientation. Will your SSA ever completely go away? I do not know. But what I do know is that if you look to HIM continually, your desires can be fulfilled in a godly way.

I wish you the best my sister!

 

[Sojourner 55]

You can DM me instead of replying to the thread if you don't like to reveal your past before God.

I'm young I'm only 20 and I'm having a situation that I'm finding really confusing and I'm not sure what to make of it. I'll explain but I posted in here specifically as it isn't a debate section so I really don't want people debating my experience or trying to confuse me further.

I have to ask here because a quick google search will show you how biased everywhere else is.

I'm a lesbian and here is a link to my story if you are interested in the details: https://christianforums.net/threads...exuality-my-experience-being-a-lesbian.96109/

Basically. I'm starting to notice that I appear to be having some kind of OPPOSITE sex attraction. I have literally never had these before and I do still have same-sex attraction as well.

I THINK I prayed to God a few days ago to help me with my same-sex attraction but it was either A. a dream or B. I was so exhausted I don't remember much about it.

And past few days I have noticed this.

I don't really have a desire to be straight, I just don't want to feel like I do when I see beautiful women (mystified at their beauty basically and some mildly impure thoughts), so I am definitely not biased or trying to consciously create opposite-sex attraction. I just find it utterly controllable when I see a beautiful woman and I feel this weird thing/urge in my heart because they are so beautiful and I just want to calm that down better as to me, that is lust even though the thoughts aren't entirely sexual.

Am I bisexual just more gay inclined and I'm only just realizing? Is God REMOVING the gay????? Am I just having another mental breakdown where I lose sense of my identity that will go away very quickly??? I don't know what is going on with me and we are living in times where I LITERALLY do not have anywhere to turn to about this. But I do remember a few people from my homosexuality thread (linked above) who talked about how they USED to have same-sex inclination, so maybe there is someone here who has had this experience when becoming a Christian or just more committed to God??

Society today would say one of two things. I am bisexual and in denial (which is what they already say when I say I'm gay but with a guy. Despite me never having desires or even attraction to male or anything male)

Or that I am becoming brainwashed my Christianity and subconsciously trying to force myself straight, and that I am a sad victim to that circumstance and should just "stop it" and do what I want because "YOLO"

Please don't debate my feelings, experiences or relationship (we got engaged yesterday so) this section is not debate which is why I'm posting here.

What I'm HOPING is someone will have had this experience and won't BS me or make assumptions for me. I'm looking for someone who KNOWS.

If noone relates then I guess I'm having another breakdown where I forget who I am which tbh is very possible because I started dissociating really heavily after my proposal

I'm confused, very impartial, very honest and did I say confused?

It is funny I feel a bit like I'm having a gay revelation in reverse as I have the confusion and even shame/embarrassment... this goes against everything society says about LGBTQ

I think what confuses me even more is people who are religious don't even think this is possible (again biased google search) as they said God CAN remove gay but he doesn't do this because you are supposed to resist the urges.

Is the devil trying to confuse/sway me???

Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be on this forum having the mental health issues I do because I'm just "making myself look nutty" which I lowkey am lol I think I'm having a dissociative breakdown but I do not know...

If I am I REALLY hope there is medication or some kind of fix for dissociation because I cannot go on like this. I can't.

Please be kind.

Anytime you have confusion or fear it's of Satan. He attacks us most in our minds. Eph 6:10-17 tells us how to protect our minds and bodies from his attacks. Do this everyday, pray and study the Word of God. He will lead you in the right direction. Your relationship with the Lord will really grow.