Should I forgive someone that does not know that I know he has had an affair with my wife?

[islandrazor]

]it might help to know what the bible word forgive really means

it does not mean saying "that's ok i forgive you" - because what was done is not ok

the Bible word forgive actually means "drop it"

when you drop it you are leaving it in God's hands - especially if you say "God i'm dropping this and leaving it in Your hands"

A lot of good advice here. And thanks truthfrees. I just checked out forgive and it's pretty cool.
The KJV translates Strong's G863 in the following manner: leave (52x), forgive (47x), suffer (14x), let (8x), forsake (6x), let alone (To suffer is to allow)

 

[blair032]

rextr05,

The point at which I struggle is when the sin of the OP is committed, in the light of 1 Cor 13:5 (NIV): 'It [Love] does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs'.

On the surface, 'it keeps no record of wrongs' sounds like I'm supposed to forget the memory of that adultery.

Greek exegete, A T Robertson, puts that idea to rest with his explanation of the Greek of 1 Cor 13:5, 'Taketh not account of evil [ou logizetai to kakon]. Old verb from [logos], to count up, to take account of as in a ledger or note-book, “the evil” [to kakon] done to love with a view to settling the account (A T Robertson, 1 Cor 13:5).

So the idea is of making up a list of wrongs of evil done to oneself with a view to taking out revenge on someone. That's what we must not do as Christians, even if one's spouse has committed adultery.

See also: What does it mean that love keeps no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5)?
Oz

Keeping a record of wrongs done to us only reminds us of the wrongs, which in turn keeps us focused on the negative situation, which in turn, stops us from forgiveness & moving on from the wrong/hurt. If whatever happened is so severe that one cannot move on with that person that wronged us, one should move on from that person so the constant reminder &/or fear is not ever present. Luckily for us, most wrongs are not of this variety. Counseling & other means of help should be investigated b4 any permanent decision is made re any serious wrong. We tend to think of any wrong as more serious than it really is bc ..... we uber-focus on ourselves.

Dismissing serious wrongs without dealing with them as they really are can lead to future problems. True forgiveness can only come thru seeing problems as real & how we are affected by them, & then focusing on forgiveness. If we dismiss something as nothing, or not see the seriousness for what it is, we can face future wrongs. Forgiveness CAN take a very long time in any case.