Thinking Distortions

[Comprehender]

The heart of sin is thinking that "misses the mark."
"As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he."

I believe that there is good and bad in each person & in each organization of people, including the LDS/Mormon church.
I appreciate many aspects of it, but I'm also realizing the need to deprogram myself from cognitive distortions I've been taught in being raised in the LDS church. Of course some of my programing has happened through my childhood - family, friends, media etc.

I've wondered if maybe some of these thinking distortions are taught in other churches, families or other belief systems. I'll just share my experiences & observances and would appreciate if anyone has any thoughts or experiences regarding these thinking distortions...

1. Filtering: filtering out positive aspects of a situation while magnifying negative...In church, I've gotten the message that I am not good enough, no matter how much I serve & give & that even if I do a lot & don't pay tithing to the church but instead to the poor, I am unworthy.
2. Polarized thinking: black- or white (when often it is a mix) - BI-POLAR thinking: "The church is either true or not." "You are either on the Lord's side or you aren't."
3. Overgeneralization - something happens once, but general conclusions are based on that one happening - (Prejudice - racial & of "non members")
4. Jumping to conclusions - concluding without knowing or considering all of the facts -(spiritual feeling interpreted to mean church is completely true, when it may be just a particular personally inspiring aspect... I was taught that if something did not fit neatly into dictated beliefs then, it should be discounted automatically..Also, many members assume that people who "apostacize" have done something wrong or are somehow misguided for leaving the church & such people are thus shunned & treated badly.
5. Catastrophizing - magnifying or minimizing, expecting disaster - "LAST DAYS!!!" Fear of God and Satan.
6. Personalization - taking things personally, comparing (See also "Always being right)
7. Control Fallacies - Viewing ourselves victim to external controls, or internalizing others pain (to feel control) - ie story of Joseph Smith & Mormons being victimized, when they also hurt others.

8. Blaming - holding others responsible for our pain, or blaming ourselves for others pain - (I've never read that Jesus ex-communicated nor disfellowshipped even "the least of these.")
9. Shoulds - making rules about everything - & inducing shame when rules aren't kept (Too many "shoulds" to name. One incorrect shaming is about sex, so many Mormons even struggle sexually after marriage)
10. Emotional Reasoning - thinking feelings are facts (when they aren't) - (I've been taught that Mormonism has a monopoly on the companionship of spirit.)
11. Fallacy of Change - Thinking we can change others & then we'll be happy (both aren't true) ... (There is the teaching that "non-members" are lacking and must change to our ways, as if our way is the only way and that if we convince someone to go our way, we will be happy.)
12. Global Labeling - Generalizing - I was taught that anything outside the beliefs of the church is wrong, but everything said by church leaders is God's word and should not be questioned.
13. Always being right - Continually on trial to prove our opinions & actions are correct - (This goes along with Personalization - where members perceive any praise or criticism of the church as praise or criticism of them.
14. Heaven's Reward Fallacy - Belief that if you suffer enough, the pay-off will be worth it after-life. More energy & money is given to try to help those who have died, than those who are alive.

 

[Kidron]

14. Heaven's Reward Fallacy - Belief that if you suffer enough, the pay-off will be worth it after-life.

In the body of Christ, there are a lot of believers who suffer from the first part of your #14.
Many many Christians have the nonscriptural belief that if they are sick or broke, it came from God, its his will for them... and its some sort of test of obedience or strengthening of character.
What has happened is that they read of the sufferings of Paul, who usually suffered >because of his preaching the Cross to JEWS<, and they somehow mentally twist Paul's persecution for the sake of the Cross into their personal life drama, which is to say that if they are poor or sick, then in their mind they are "like Paul" and "becoming more like Christ".
Its silly, really, but, some Christians just cling to this nonsense as if God wrote it on their bedroom wall.
They actually identify their sickness and poverty as the same as Paul being persecuted for preaching the cross to Jews.
Its ridiculous.
,
The good news is,, that not only does God save us, but he REestablishes us as his eternal "heirs", and in this high position in the family of God we are co-owners of all God has, including his Power, and the Glory of his Son... as this is our right of born again Sonship within the family of God as we operate and function in the Kingdom of his Son, on behalf of God's will.

We come to God as guilty sinners and he transforms us, by the blood of his sacrificed son, into Priests and Saints and Sons of God with his very authority available to us as its the very power of Christ who is in us and we "in Christ" that creates this positional transformation.
We do not get this later after we die......we have it right now.
We now have access to all that God has, all that God is, and all that God can do, as he is IN US and we are IN HIM and this profound repositioning has spiritually recreated us to do the very works of Christ on God's behalf here on earth.
This legal heavenly status, this blood bought covenant reworking of our completely restored relationship to God, allows us full time authority to do what God does and to have what God has, as it has become our legal right by blood bought covenant as we have become God's heir through Chirst.
Galatians 4:7.

There is no way to even mentally grasp the fullness of this total and completed restoration back into the authority of God as it is so lofty, so eternal, so complete, so God imputed, that just realizing who we have become "in Christ" once understood, should cause every Christian who gets this revelation, to jump, shout ,witness, serve..... and love God even more.




K

 

[Aardverk]

Hi Comprehender.

A good church is like a good parent and visa versa.

A good parent brings up their child with a balanced outlook on life and an enquiring mind - and so does a good church.

A bad parent will often bring up their child to be nervous of their abilities and qualities and to never feel good enough OR they may exaggerate and over-praise the child and thereby distort their self image. The child may be left with life-long neuroses that can only be tackled in long term psychotherapy (with a proper psychotherapist). The parent may well teach the child never to think for themselves, never to question what they are told and to do exactly as they are told. They may well introduce illogoical prejudice against others and even hatred of some other groups. They will usually distort and/or supress the development of the child to suit their own ends - which is just as bad as physical abuse.

That is exactly what bad churches do. I don't want to work my way through all of your list but I think this explains a lot of it. Think of a church as like a parent - in loco parentis - are they doing a good job or a bad job?

 

[Jethro Bodine]

Comprehender,

"Many will...bring the way of truth into disrepute." (2 Peter NIV1984)

I found out when I got born again that the things you listed are, generally speaking, the marks of the 'church of the world' (particularly the cults), meaning the large, traditional denominations of the church--the churches the world goes to when they want to 'go to church'.

When I got around groups of people outside of the 'church of the world' who shared the experience of being genuinely born again these things no longer characterized the group. Of course they were present to some degree, and at varying times, but I noticed they did not charaterize the group.

I'm with Jesus when it comes to the major church denominaltions of the world and how polluted by imposters and their doctrines they have become:

13 ...“Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. 14 Leave them; they are blind guides. If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit.” (Matthew 15:13-14 NIV1984)

IOW, a man who can see can not be mislead by a man who can not see. So, leave them, and don't worry about blind men leading equally blind people into error. One can wear themselves out trying to make sure others know these spiritless denominations of the church don't represent the truth and that we ourselves should not be lumped in with them (if that is really true), but the truth is it's a waste of time to tell that to people who can't see, and unnecessary to tell to people who can see.

 

[for_his_glory]

Are we listening to the Church or the Holy Spirit that governs Gods people. The mind tends to rationalize, define within its interpretations, and concludes its on theories. To know the mind of Christ is having that very Spirit of God indwelling in you for all acknowledgements of what the Spirit of God is working in you and through you.

John 14:26 But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

Colossians 3:1 If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God.
Colossians 3:2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.
Colossians 3:3 For ye are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God.
Colossians 3:4 When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory.
Colossians 3:5 Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry:
Colossians 3:6 For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience:
Colossians 3:7 In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them.
Colossians 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.
Colossians 3:9 Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds;
Colossians 3:10 And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him:
Colossians 3:11 Where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all.
Colossians 3:12 Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
Colossians 3:13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
Colossians 3:14 And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.
Colossians 3:15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.
Colossians 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
Colossians 3:17 And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.

 

[Comprehender]

In the body of Christ, there are a lot of believers who suffer from the first part of your #14.
Many many Christians have the nonscriptural belief that if they are sick or broke, it came from God, its his will for them... and its some sort of test of obedience or strengthening of character.
What has happened is that they read of the sufferings of Paul, who usually suffered >because of his preaching the Cross to JEWS<, and they somehow mentally twist Paul's persecution for the sake of the Cross into their personal life drama, which is to say that if they are poor or sick, then in their mind they are "like Paul" and "becoming more like Christ".
Its silly, really, but, some Christians just cling to this nonsense as if God wrote it on their bedroom wall.
They actually identify their sickness and poverty as the same as Paul being persecuted for preaching the cross to Jews.
Its ridiculous.
,
The good news is,, that not only does God save us, but he REestablishes us as his eternal "heirs", and in this high position in the family of God we are co-owners of all God has, including his Power, and the Glory of his Son... as this is our right of born again Sonship within the family of God as we operate and function in the Kingdom of his Son, on behalf of God's will.

We come to God as guilty sinners and he transforms us, by the blood of his sacrificed son, into Priests and Saints and Sons of God with his very authority available to us as its the very power of Christ who is in us and we "in Christ" that creates this positional transformation.
We do not get this later after we die......we have it right now.
We now have access to all that God has, all that God is, and all that God can do, as he is IN US and we are IN HIM and this profound repositioning has spiritually recreated us to do the very works of Christ on God's behalf here on earth.
This legal heavenly status, this blood bought covenant reworking of our completely restored relationship to God, allows us full time authority to do what God does and to have what God has, as it has become our legal right by blood bought covenant as we have become God's heir through Chirst.
Galatians 4:7.

There is no way to even mentally grasp the fullness of this total and completed restoration back into the authority of God as it is so lofty, so eternal, so complete, so God imputed, that just realizing who we have become "in Christ" once understood, should cause every Christian who gets this revelation, to jump, shout ,witness, serve..... and love God even more.




K

Thanks K - I like how you put that!
I see that too - that sometimes people (me too at times) seem to almost worship their suffering - either by identifying themselves as victims, or by ignoring their response-ability of making life better for themselves.

When I was younger, my older sister used to tease me of being naive & my mom would tease me of feeling sorry for myself. This made me want to be tougher - to suffer, so I'd know more & not be so wimpy. I did some stupid things - ran away from home & was hurt & several times I could've been killed. I still struggle with some of the consequences of my decisions.

I think suffering can deepen us - but there are 2 types of pain...
1. Clean pain (natural consequences of doing something harmful to us or others emotionally or physically)
2. Dirty pain (when we beat ourselves up about it long after the clean pain)

 

[Comprehender]

Hi Comprehender.

A good church is like a good parent and visa versa.

A good parent brings up their child with a balanced outlook on life and an enquiring mind - and so does a good church.

A bad parent will often bring up their child to be nervous of their abilities and qualities and to never feel good enough OR they may exaggerate and over-praise the child and thereby distort their self image. The child may be left with life-long neuroses that can only be tackled in long term psychotherapy (with a proper psychotherapist). The parent may well teach the child never to think for themselves, never to question what they are told and to do exactly as they are told. They may well introduce illogoical prejudice against others and even hatred of some other groups. They will usually distort and/or supress the development of the child to suit their own ends - which is just as bad as physical abuse.

That is exactly what bad churches do. I don't want to work my way through all of your list but I think this explains a lot of it. Think of a church as like a parent - in loco parentis - are they doing a good job or a bad job?

Great analogy! Thanks, Aardvark.
I think most people seek parental figures.
I'd say most look for it through romance - since that seems to be the topic of worship on most radio & tv stations & other media.

I guess we really need a sense of community & church can provide that.
But as you mentioned, we have to be careful about the influence we surround ourselves with.
We couldn't choose our parents, but we can choose our friends & church.

 

[Comprehender]

Comprehender,

"Many will...bring the way of truth into disrepute." (2 Peter NIV1984)

I found out when I got born again that the things you listed are, generally speaking, the marks of the 'church of the world' (particularly the cults), meaning the large, traditional denominations of the church--the churches the world goes to when they want to 'go to church'.

When I got around groups of people outside of the 'church of the world' who shared the experience of being genuinely born again these things no longer characterized the group. Of course they were present to some degree, and at varying times, but I noticed they did not charaterize the group.

I'm with Jesus when it comes to the major church denominaltions of the world and how polluted by imposters and their doctrines they have become:

13 ...“Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots. 14 Leave them; they are blind guides. If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into a pit.” (Matthew 15:13-14 NIV1984)

IOW, a man who can see can not be mislead by a man who can not see. So, leave them, and don't worry about blind men leading equally blind people into error. One can wear themselves out trying to make sure others know these spiritless denominations of the church don't represent the truth and that we ourselves should not be lumped in with them (if that is really true), but the truth is it's a waste of time to tell that to people who can't see, and unnecessary to tell to people who can see.

Thanks, Jethro.
I especially like the underlined part.
This is why I feel so passionate about education - learning & teaching!
It started out that I wanted to know & understand more thoroughly Mormon/LDS doctrine, the temple & the atonement. I studied & studied - & tried to make sense of it. A few years ago, I began to see deeper - & it just keeps getting deeper! I have a long ways to go & I've seen more ugliness that I hadn't seen before, but I've also seen more beauty.

The way I've seen more has often beeb by learning from others, so I think we shouldn't give up sharing our perspectives, even if they are always changing & developing, & even if others are less than receptive. But I do think we should do everything in love... (note to myself).

 

[Comprehender]

Are we listening to the Church or the Holy Spirit that governs Gods people. The mind tends to rationalize, define within its interpretations, and concludes its on theories. To know the mind of Christ is having that very Spirit of God indwelling in you for all acknowledgements of what the Spirit of God is working in you and through you.

John 14:26 But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you.

Colossians 3:1 If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God.
Colossians 3:2 Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.
Colossians 3:3 For ye are dead and your life is hid with Christ in God.
Colossians 3:4 When Christ, who is our life, shall appear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory.
Colossians 3:5 Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry:
Colossians 3:6 For which things' sake the wrath of God cometh on the children of disobedience:
Colossians 3:7 In the which ye also walked some time, when ye lived in them.
Colossians 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.
Colossians 3:9 Lie not one to another, seeing that ye have put off the old man with his deeds;
Colossians 3:10 And have put on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him:
Colossians 3:11 Where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all.
Colossians 3:12 Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering;
Colossians 3:13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
Colossians 3:14 And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.
Colossians 3:15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.
Colossians 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
Colossians 3:17 And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him.

Thank you for this, ForHisGlory.
Our minds can be our best friend or worst enemy.
I think it's essential to learn to harmonize both reason and spirit.
When I've only gone by spirit, I've been tempted to translate spirit how I wanted, not so much as God would likely want.
When I've gone only by reason... then faith & associated passion & love were missing.