Yes, it's a 12 step program.
If Jesus is "one with the father", why would there be a need for "obedience"? Why would there be a differing "will"?
I believe that the answer lies in a correct understanding of what Jesus was obedient to, seen in the light of a fundamental commitment that God made at the time of creation.
As I have already stated, I believe that Paul's fundamental point about Jesus' obedience was that He (Jesus) was obedient to the
covenantal obligations which His people,
Israel, failed to fulfill. Now to put this in the right context to address your question:
1. At the beginning of the Genesis account, God makes a commitment: the universe he is creating needs to
have human beings "in charge". Thus, God places Adam in this position.
2. Adam falls, and now the universe will not run properly, since its "guardian / steward" has fallen.
3. God calls
Abraham as the man who will fix the Adamic fall by using Abraham to father a people who will, in fact, take back the role of being "human stewards" of creation. Remember, God is
committed to having human beings at the helm of the universe (at least in some sense).
4. Abraham and his people - the nation of
Israel - have certain obligations to fulfill in respect to the covenant that God makes with him.
5. The nation of Israel
fails to keep these covenant obligations. Does this mean that God gives up on His plan to put humans back in charge of the universe. No, he finds a
single faithful Israelite who will indeed fulfill Israel's covenant obligations on her behalf. That Israelite is, of course, Jesus of Nazareth.
6. Jesus, then has to be obedient to these covenant obligations, which He is.
One needs to have this entire narrative in hand to make sense of why Jesus has to be a
human being, who is also an
Israelite. With this story in mind, the necessity for Jesus being obedient in this way should be clear.