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When to get married

Classik

Classik

Member
At what time should a man/woman get married?


Considering:

*AGE
*INCOME
etc

Thanks...
I just wanna know your views:lol
 
It's hard to give a definite age since there are so many variables involved. I would say when the two are emotionally mature and financially stable. For most people, that would be well into their mid to late twenties. Entering into a marriage when the two are neither emotionally mature and financially stable is asking for trouble. Not that it can't be done, but it would be very difficult for the majority of people.
 
I would say when you decide that you will spend the rest of your life with another person. Maturity will come and finances will never be there before hand.
 
elizabethbraddock said:
It's hard to give a definite age since there are so many variables involved. I would say when the two are emotionally mature and financially stable. For most people, that would be well into their mid to late twenties. Entering into a marriage when the two are neither emotionally mature and financially stable is asking for trouble. Not that it can't be done, but it would be very difficult for the majority of people.
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Well emphasised: emotional maturity and financial stability.
 
Fedusenko said:
I would say when you decide that you will spend the rest of your life with another person. Maturity will come and finances will never be there before hand.
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We presently treated a case where a boy and a girl (permit me to use that) got 'involved'. Both parents from both sides allowed this.

I want to believe financial stability is very important (and if not inevitable), and of course emotional maturity, too.

I heard of a woman whi got married at the age of 12....

Looks ridiculous. What does this girl know about marriage? Absolutely nothing.
 
Fedusenko said:
I would say when you decide that you will spend the rest of your life with another person. Maturity will come and finances will never be there before hand.
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True, finances will never be perfect. That's why I stressed financial stability. Money is a huge source of conflict, and those affairs need to be stable before jumping into marriage. It would be irresponsible otherwise, and a source of a bitter conflict.
 
Some good points have been made.

Also, often the time to get married is when NOT doing so would become rather problematic.
 
I've shared before that, most of my family members married quite young.

This includes my:
Parents, both 17 when married married for 55 years when dad passed
My in-laws, he 27 - she 21 married for 48 years (however Steve's dad was divorced... quite shocking, his mom marrying a man with a past)
My eldest sister and brother-in-law, she 18 - he 24 married for 37 years
My next sister and brother-in-law, both 17 married for 37 years as well (busy summer that year, both sisters getting married)
My brother and sister-in-law, he 19 - she 17 (or maybe just 18, I think her birthday is right before her anniversary) married for 35 years

And, lest one think "Well that was then, things are different now"...

My eldest sisters kids:
Niece and husband, she 18 - he 20 married for 15 years
Nephew and wife, he 19 - she 18 married for 13 years
(They have another daughter, but she has some severe mental issues... I truly don't count her as far as this subject is concerned)

My next sister's kids:
Niece and husband, she 26 - he 25 married for 9 years
Nephew and wife, he 28 - she 25 married for 5 years
Younger nephew and wife, he 18 - she 17 (first ones to get married in this family) married for 12 years

Brother's kids:
Niece and husband, she 18 - he 19 married for 9 years
Nephew and wife, he 20 - she 20 married for 7 years
Younger nephew and wife - he 21 - she 25 married for 5 years

Most would say everyone married "too young"... but there's not a divorce in the bunch, all now own their own homes and all have solid marriages and happy families. And, these marriages have weathered some rocky times... miscarriage, death of babies, unemployment, severe health issues...

I wish I could have married young... Not that I would trade in my beloved Steve or kids, but when I see my sisters now having "empty nests" and enjoying grand-kids when I'm dealing with being a "sandwich"... one who is still raising children but also needing to meet the ever increasing needs of aging parents. Fortunately my sisters help with my mom (brother lends emotional support but he lives out of state), but Steve's folks are right next door and meeting their needs falls solely on our shoulders.

I don't think it's a matter of stability or emotional maturity... these things will come. It's more a matter of how one looks at marriage and whether or not one is marrying for the right reasons.

I would say, if one is walking with the Lord, prayerfully bring all this to Him, has a solid understanding of what God's purpose for marriage is and is willing to make the sacrifices... early marriage is better than later marriage. I say this because I was 38 when I got married so I've observed the dynamics of the "married when young" and I know my own marriage... I think the "married when young" is the better way to go.

Another vital thing... because marriage is viewed as important in my family, my family supports young couples... several of these couples lived with their folks when first married or moved in when needing a place... the parents and grandparents helped the kids out... none of this attitude of "WELL IF YOU THINK YOU'RE OLD ENOUGH TO BE MARRIED YOU HAVE TO DO IT ALL ON YOUR OWN"

We don't take such a punitive attitude when someone decides to honor God in their relationship and marry... we support each other in our marriages and help each other out when necessary. I think the larger family support has gone a long ways towards making these marriage successful.
 
Our beloved Dora, this is awesome and shocking at the same time :lol


Any health effect????
How mature are those bodies??? What happens at old age???

At least a girl should be matured to have babies. (I don't mean the people you mentioned aren't...

I know of someone who did it at 12/13/14/15):shocked
 
God designed our bodies for sex and babies to be optimum in our late teens... There is no ill health effects for 17 - 18 year olds to have babies.

12 is very young. I don't even think in Biblical times, 12 was OK for marriage... Wasn't the age one was considered adult 13?
 
handy said:
God designed our bodies for sex and babies to be optimum in our late teens... There is no ill health effects for 17 - 18 year olds to have babies.

12 is very young. I don't even think in Biblical times, 12 was OK for marriage... Wasn't the age one was considered adult 13?
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handy:

So I guess you would think that 18 is quite an ideal time to get married, then?

God bless your family.
 
God's_gift said:
it's when you already stopped asking this kind of question hahhaha:toofunny
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Actually, this is probably the best answer there is. When these kinds of questions don't matter to both of you...you're ready to get married.

I got married when I was 19. My fondest memories are of those first few weeks of marriage when we had absolutely nothing (I wasn't even working, lol). We rented a house from my wife's brother for $100 or $150 a month (worth every dime, but I loved it). She packed fruit at a local farm for minimum wage, $3.35/hr, I think. I joined her there in time. Then I joined the Air Force because I felt I needed a career of some kind.

There's just something about marriage that God honors, even for unbelievers. If you want to do it he just seems to take care of people who do it even when every outward circumstance says not to. That doesn't mean it will be easy. It means God makes a way for the holy institution of marriage he created.

It'll be 30 years for me and my wife this Wednesday. It hasn't turned out real well, but I can honestly say I don't regret it. I have fond memories and somehow the grace of God gives peace and comfort in retrospect for the times where it's been tough...really tough.
 
before you get involved in a sexual relationship :wave

Or when your 17 and know EVERYTHING like i did....:sad
 
Jethro Bodine said:
Actually, this is probably the best answer there is. When these kinds of questions don't matter to both of you...you're ready to get married.

I got married when I was 19. My fondest memories are of those first few weeks of marriage when we had absolutely nothing (I wasn't even working, lol). We rented a house from my wife's brother for $100 or $150 a month (worth every dime, but I loved it). She packed fruit at a local farm for minimum wage, $3.35/hr, I think. I joined her there in time. Then I joined the Air Force because I felt I needed a career of some kind.

There's just something about marriage that God honors, even for unbelievers. If you want to do it he just seems to take care of people who do it even when every outward circumstance says not to. That doesn't mean it will be easy. It means God makes a way for the holy institution of marriage he created.

It'll be 30 years for me and my wife this Wednesday. It hasn't turned out real well, but I can honestly say I don't regret it. I have fond memories and somehow the grace of God gives peace and comfort in retrospect for the times where it's been tough...really tough.
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A great Wednessday!!!!:lol congrats
 
Jethro, Those broke years those years of real sharing.... when all you had was each other :thumbsup they are better looking back then when i was there.....
 
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