Why do women sometimes get distant?

[Dave Slayer]

Why do women sometimes get distant in relationships? Sometimes it seems like women get rather distant at times, why is this? And how can we men deal with it in a kind and loving manner?

 

[Blazin Bones]

Men can deal with this with patience. Ask any woman, some days they cannot tell you why but they just feel like being left alone. Men have these days too. The best way to respond is to give her the space she needs. I know it's hard, but it works, I promise.

 

[Tina]

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Men can deal with this with patience. Ask any woman, some days they cannot tell you why but they just feel like being left alone. Men have these days too. The best way to respond is to give her the space she needs. I know it's hard, but it works, I promise.

Oh I love you Blazin Bones .... you understand women very well !!!!!


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[Dave Slayer]

I am surprised no ladies themselves have replied to this post. :o

Perhaps I should ask my Mom. :yes

 

[Tina]

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I am surprised no ladies themselves have replied to this post. :o

Perhaps I should ask my Mom. :yes

You don't consider me as a lady ???


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[Dave Slayer]

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I am surprised no ladies themselves have replied to this post. :o

Perhaps I should ask my Mom. :yes

You don't consider me as a lady ???


.....

I do, but you didn't reply either. But I saw you did reply at the other forum. ;)

 

[GojuBrian]

Why do women sometimes get distant in relationships? Sometimes it seems like women get rather distant at times, why is this? And how can we men deal with it in a kind and loving manner?

I have no problem with women getting distant at times, sometimes I want to be left alone for a while. When they get distant, I give them their space and take my own at the same time. I don't want someone attached to my hip at all times.

 

[Blazin Bones]

Tina, all I understand is that I know almost nothing. Isn't that rule #1?

 

[Reido]

Why do women sometimes get distant in relationships? Sometimes it seems like women get rather distant at times, why is this? And how can we men deal with it in a kind and loving manner?

Well I don't think all women get distant, and I think some men get distant as well.
I think it largely depends on the person, really.
There could be a lot of reasons for it.
Maybe something upset her, maybe she just likes time to herself sometimes, maybe it's her period, etc.
As for dealing with it in a kind and loving manner, just be kind and loving but make sure that if she wants some space or something to not smother her in loving kindness and actually respect her and give her the space she wants/needs.

 

[lovely]

When I am distant, I am usually feeling emotional about something, and I want to keep it close and think about it, or pray about it. It doesn't mean there is a problem in the relationship, but I guess it could mean that.

 

[Blazin Bones]

I know for me, I am the kind of guy who wants to feel know that I am treating my wife in a manner that is right and that she knows that my love is still there and as strong as ever. It's tough to sometimes have to feel distant from Caroline. However, I know we made a PERMANENT commitment and that she loves me. So even if there are some distant feelings, I know that they will subside in time. For the husband, that has to be enough.

If the wife is upset about something, contray to popular humor, it is not the Husband Job to read his wife mind and his problem. Wives have to be open about what is upseting them and husband need to honest enough to be able to know if it is something they have done or need to lay before the Lord.

 

[lovely]

However, I know we made a PERMANENT commitment and that she loves me. So even if there are some distant feelings, I know that they will subside in time.

This is the absolute truth for those who take marriage seriously. We can know that there is a vow between us, even if we are feeling distant at times. I think you are also right in saying that if a wife is being distant because she is upset, that she should be able to bring it before her husband...he should be willing to listen, and she should be willing to receive his response. It's not always easy, but it's a process that grows us as couples, and just fosters more love and more trust.

 

[sheshisown]

:waving
But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. James 3:17-18 [emp. mine]

This williness to yeild is given by a meek heart, a person is easy to be approached when they are "wise". Someone who is easy to be approached has no edge or hardness in their hearing. They openly listen as if this is the FIRST hearing, without pre-judging, or allowing "self needs and desires" to exert themselves into their hearing. :yes

The character of heavenly wisdom has fruit too... James here is defining exactly what he meant by the meekness of wisdom in James 3:13.

Who is wise . . . Let him show by his good conduct: Wisdom is not mere head knowledge. Okay, okay, I know how I am supposed to treat my spouse but only action reveals readiness to yeild and the fruit which accompanies it. Real wisdom and understanding will show in our lives, by our good actions or our inaction regarding this matter of sweet carefulness between husband and wife. . .

His or her works are done in the meekness of wisdom: True wisdom is evident by its meek manner. Meek means selfless. Those who do their good works in a way designed to bring attention to themselves show they lack true wisdom. Jesus is meek and lowly. What woman or man is FULL of mercy and is also unwilling to wait~ to grant the other a space of time to seek the Lord, to understand what is happening within oneself?

This wonderful wisdom never puts anyone or anything BEFORE the Lord and His ways and will in any matter. Being partial places self first usually.

The character of this wisdom is wonderful. It is peace ~ full, gentle, It is full of love and a giving heart, consistent with the holiness of God.

What was the fruit? This fruit is like a seed that will bear fruit as it is sown. May we learn to sow righteousness in peace by this our Father' word. :heart

sheshisown~

 

[Mohrb]

[youtube:131dgsva]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lV5lnYlR58[/youtube:131dgsva]

 

[Tina]

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:toofunny ... funny video !

 

[Feldew]

*facepalm* Just like I said in the other forum, men do things like this too, it's just human nature. Honestly. Part of why people find the other gender so enigmatic is that they get this mindset that all sorts of human behaviors are exclusive to one gender then wonder why they do it, when really all humans do. And then the answer is simple. People need their space sometimes, to think, to brood, whatever.

 

[stovebolts]

Sometimes when a woman gets distant, she just wants you closer to her... and she doesn't want a fix and she may not even want to talk.., she just wants to be held, loved and comforted...

 

[LaMexicana]

I feel when I'm distant, it's because I have a lot of emotions going through me that I don't feel anyone would truly understand. At times I find it easier to talk through my own craziness with myself than with other people...there is less judgement involved. And maybe sometimes we don't want to hear the usual cliche sayings, like, everything will be ok...you'll figure it out...blah blah blah. It can get annoying and it's actually not really that helpful. Alone time can help you clear up your brain and heart a little faster than if you involved those around you.

 

[LaMexicana]

Sometimes when a woman gets distant, she just wants you closer to her... and she doesn't want a fix and she may not even want to talk.., she just wants to be held, loved and comforted...

And I agree with that. Sometimes actions and not too many words are much more helpful

 

[PouringRain]

Sometimes when a woman gets distant, she just wants you closer to her... and she doesn't want a fix and she may not even want to talk.., she just wants to be held, loved and comforted...

And then the answer is simple. People need their space sometimes, to think, to brood, whatever.

I think both of these are correct and depend on the person.... so it is best to talk to your partner (male or female) and find out what the problem is and what you can do about it. For some people they just want some space and may be feeling smothered, for others they may want you to push closer to them and show them you are there, and for others it may be nothing at all and the "distance" might be your own perception rather than an actuality.