Sheriff Andy Taylor of Mayberry Under Investigation

[elijah23]

Sheriff Andy Taylor of Mayberry, North Carolina, is being investigated for improper incarceration of a prisoner, for leaving Otis Campbell in the county jail unattended.

“Otis had the key, for crying out loud! He was never in any danger,†stated the sheriff in his own defense.

“Doesn’t matter,†rebuffed Clyde Hillings of the American Civil Liberties Union. “It is unacceptable to leave a prisoner unattended in a jail cell.â€

If found guilty, Taylor could be relieved of duty.

 

[elijah23]

Beatrice Taylor, the sheriff’s nephew, fainted upon hearing the news, but is resting comfortably in the Mayberry Hospital.

Floyd Lawson, a barber in Mayberry, and reputedly a close friend of the sheriff, suffered a nervous breakdown upon hearing the news and also was admitted to the hospital. “This is awful, just awful!†he repeatedly muttered.

 

[mcmurry]

I'm pretty sure that Beatrice(Bea)Taylor was Andy's aunt. Even if she wasn't, I'm really sure SHE was not his nephew.

 

[elijah23]

Good observation. These small town newspapers leave a lot to be desired.

More importantly, one must have great sympathy for the citizens of Mayberry as they suffer through this difficult experience.

 

[jasoncran]

mayberry township is being sued by the aclu for not hiring with fair practices.

 

[elijah23]

mayberry township is being sued by the aclu for not hiring with fair practices.

What is the evidence against Mayberry?

 

[jasoncran]

What is the evidence against Mayberry?

no token black officers that speak in jive or ebonics.

 

[elijah23]

no token black officers that speak in jive or ebonics.

There was just the one deputy, and he was the sheriff’s cousin.

 

[jasoncran]

There was just the one deputy, and he was the sheriff’s cousin.

lol. i dont recall that one. nepotism. the person who couldnt get a job is suing for discrimination and nepotism.

 

[elijah23]

lol. i dont recall that one. nepotism. the person who couldnt get a job is suing for discrimination and nepotism.

You would turn Opie and Aunt Bea out on the streets?

* wipes tear from his eye *

 

[jasoncran]

You would turn Opie and Aunt Bea out on the streets?

* wipes tear from his eye *

lol. nepotism run rapant were i work. its common in govt jobs.

 

[elijah23]

lol. nepotism run rapant were i work. its common in govt jobs.

Good, then you won’t turn Andy in.

 

[jasoncran]

Good, then you won’t turn Andy in.

sorry, i would. nepotism isnt illegal but not good idea as the idea of favoritism and subsuquent law suits. i am the lawyer for the plaintiff.

 

[elijah23]

sorry, i would. nepotism isnt illegal but not good idea as the idea of favoritism and subsuquent law suits. i am the lawyer for the plaintiff.

I am sorry, but the plaintiff has been imprisoned for selling moonshine. Keep in mind this is a dry county. The sheriff and his deputy raided the plaintiff's home yesterday and found a still, which has since been dismantled and removed from the plaintiff's property. The judge, another cousin of the sheriff's, will preside at the trial tomorrow.

 

[jasoncran]

I am sorry, but the plaintiff has been imprisoned for selling moonshine. Keep in mind this is a dry county. The sheriff and his deputy raided the plaintiff's home yesterday and found a still, which has since been dismantled and removed from the plaintiff's property. The judge, another cousin of the sheriff's, will preside at the trial tomorrow.

that doesnt mean he cant sue, and i'm on that case. unless you care to say that 5th amendment is null and avoid because its a hick town in north carolina, i will go to the higher courts as i feel a predujice from this judge and also the jury will be biased as per a voir dire call today.

therefore the trial will be in charlotte.

 

[elijah23]

that doesnt mean he cant sue, and i'm on that case. unless you care to say that 5th amendment is null and avoid because its a hick town in north carolina, i will go to the higher courts as i feel a predujice from this judge and also the jury will be biased as per a voir dire call today.

therefore the trial will be in charlotte.

We don’t talk French here in Mayberry, and being in jail here is sort of like being in the Ritz Hotel somewhere else. Why not have a piece of Aunt Bea’s homemade pie? Your client can’t get enough of it.

 

[jasoncran]

We don’t talk French here in Mayberry, and being in jail here is sort of like being in the Ritz Hotel somewhere else. Why not have a piece of Aunt Bea’s homemade pie? Your client can’t get enough of it.

no, thanks sir. i have advised my client not to talk to the defendent.

 

[elijah23]

no, thanks sir. i have advised my client not to talk to the defendent.

Your client IS the defendant. Have some of Aunt Bea’s fried chicken. You’ll love it.

 

[jasoncran]

Your client IS the defendant. Have some of Aunt Bea’s fried chicken. You’ll love it.

lol, wrong lawyer. i am not his defense lawyer.

 

[jasoncran]

lol, wrong lawyer. i am not his defense lawyer.

now that i mentioned to my client, his defense lawyer and i shall work together as a team when necessary. I would adivse aunt bea, and et all to get a lawyer. and i filed a writ with the state supreme court to ask that the judge be reclused from the nepotism case and also with the drunk and disorderly charges.