[__ Prayer __] accident on 20th st

[jasoncran]

today I saw a car upside down on intersection where many speeders who go to fast die. im also needing prayer as I have some cynical things with god. part of the reason I have ceased from posting here.

 

[Eugene]

Hey Brother Jason, I'm praying for you, and our enemy can throw a multitude of excuses to slow our testimony. I face that on a daily basis, and we have to reestablish the reason we keep on keeping on, and that always comes through the word; "God so loved . ." Many times only God knows the suffering you face as you take what He gives you for other's sake; that is indeed a part of taking up our cross and following Him. The reward will not be denied you in this world or the one to come. What you say today might just encourage that one called of God that none other could deliver with such conviction to help in their time of need. I appreciate you brother, and don't jump ship just yet; God has plans for our good in these things. Look up, our redemption dwaweth nigh.

 

[Deborah13]

Praying for you, Jason.

 

[jasoncran]

in time, I will post what it is and why. the issues are myriad and the healing is a long process. it wasn't in my plan of growth via inner healing classes to see that but it is there. things from my past are still with me.

 

[reba]

Jason my brother you are held in prayer.

 

[jasoncran]

don't forget the accident victim(s).

 

[AirDancer]

Those involved and/or affected by that accident are in my prayers. You remain in my prayers as well, my friend. The challenges we each face on a daily basis are sometimes far from being a jolly time. Just keep in mind that 'shadows' from our pasts are brought forward to the present by the devil to plague us, to make us feel worthless, to make us question our faith. Stay strong with our Lord!

 

[jasoncran]

Those involved and/or affected by that accident are in my prayers. You remain in my prayers as well, my friend. The challenges we each face on a daily basis are sometimes far from being a jolly time. Just keep in mind that 'shadows' from our pasts are brought forward to the present by the devil to plague us, to make us feel worthless, to make us question our faith. Stay strong with our Lord!

no this is a god thing the past must be free from hurt. sometimes we must heal, grieve, forgive and unlearn,

 

[jasoncran]

no this is a god thing the past must be free from hurt. sometimes we must heal, grieve, forgive and unlearn,

ok, I do have some co-dependency tendency. there is some healing I have received , Claudya will understand this. I tended to base my attitude of the day or work on my hobby. this was a learned habit(to include work which I still must let go) from my youth. no more if I have a bad day at medinas shall I pout or well do the other bad habit. to include working on a car and not able to fix it. that doenst mean I don't care or wont have a bad day but that God is my source. I want to add that I ask that God lead me to a man who is emotionally stable to assist in my healing. that and more in depth study on codependency. StoveBolts, the more I put into this class the more im healed. not going to claim that few months im set free from it all just I can see it.

 

[Claudya]

ok, I do have some co-dependency tendency. there is some healing I have received , Claudya will understand this. I tended to base my attitude of the day or work on my hobby. this was a learned habit(to include work which I still must let go) from my youth. no more if I have a bad day at medinas shall I pout or well do the other bad habit. to include working on a car and not able to fix it. that doenst mean I don't care or wont have a bad day but that God is my source. I want to add that I ask that God lead me to a man who is emotionally stable to assist in my healing. that and more in depth study on codependency. StoveBolts, the more I put into this class the more im healed. not going to claim that few months im set free from it all just I can see it.

It's awesome (and reason for hope) that you consider it a learned habit rather than your fate or your personality or anything outside of your control that you are just stuck with. A learned habit can be unlearned. Give yourself time, though. I've been trying to unlearn for many years and seeing progress only slowly.
I'll pray you'll find someone to be your mentor in regards to emotional stability. In the meantime there are various resources on the internet about how to stabilise your mood, deal with stress, anger, fear, rejection, and how to identify self-harming thoughts (and what to do to switch them off).

 

[jasoncran]

I prefer in person. the nature of this problem isn't like that. self loathing I have comes from rejection. now that I know I can negate that. just with that there is need to have the opposite demonstrated and learned.

 

[Claudya]

I prefer in person. the nature of this problem isn't like that. self loathing I have comes from rejection. now that I know I can negate that. just with that there is need to have the opposite demonstrated and learned.

What opposite? You need a role model to demonstrate how to deal with rejection in a reasonable/ normal/ healthy way?

 

[jasoncran]

not that fully, but also what is not codependent in nature. they do go hand in hand.my wife is codependent, and unaware of it. her dad is an an alcoholic. she was big into pot and also had some of that tendency. co dependents attract each other.

 

[Eugene]

I prefer in person. the nature of this problem isn't like that. self loathing I have comes from rejection. now that I know I can negate that. just with that there is need to have the opposite demonstrated and learned.

Dear brother, I can only guess at things we don't forget as God does considering our past. Isaiah 43:25 I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins. If God doesn't remember our sins for His sake, why have ourselves crying in our beer?

I have personally found the things in my life that hung on to bother me were things I had not forgiven, and that included not only things others had done to me, but that which I had done also.

 

[jasoncran]

it is but as at times god calls them to rememberance so that we can let go. when we do its edifying.

 

[jasoncran]

oh like the comment Claudya made in a thread. women exist only to break men's heart. when I read that. God said that Is the wall you have up with all women. he is most right. I was used by a girl and since then I said I wouldn't allow my heart to be robbed like that. I forgive her for what she did but I aslo went defensive. this isn't of god to do that.

 

[Claudya]

oh like the comment Claudya made in a thread. women exist only to break men's heart. when I read that. God said that Is the wall you have up with all women. he is most right. I was used by a girl and since then I said I wouldn't allow my heart to be robbed like that. I forgive her for what she did but I aslo went defensive. this isn't of god to do that.

I said "devour", not break.
And it was entirely a joke, in response to the joke Eugene made about women.
Sorry you had a bad experience with a woman, but many people, women and men, have heartbreaks. It's a risk we all have to take when we allow ourselves to fall in love especially when we're still young and unexperienced. If you refuse to accept that risk you can't love. You're right, that isn't of God. He can teach you to love more unconditionally, reducing the amount of disappointment you will have. Though Romantic love isn't unconditional.

 

[Eugene]

it is but as at times god calls them to rememberance so that we can let go. when we do its edifying.

You didn't reference me in this reply, but how can God bring a forgiven sin to remembrance that he has put as far as the east is from the west from Him to be remembered no more? To me, the moment we bring them to light is that we don't want to forget, or that we don't really believe we're clean from all sin. In other words; what more do I need to do LORD to be free from what you gave Jesus to die for that I might have life, and that more abundantly?

 

[jasoncran]

I said "devour", not break.
And it was entirely a joke, in response to the joke Eugene made about women.
Sorry you had a bad experience with a woman, but many people, women and men, have heartbreaks. It's a risk we all have to take when we allow ourselves to fall in love especially when we're still young and unexperienced. If you refuse to accept that risk you can't love. You're right, that isn't of God. He can teach you to love more unconditionally, reducing the amount of disappointment you will have. Though Romantic love isn't unconditional.

yet many do. get married and get divorced and it will affect how you deal with men. you will be more defensive as society and human nature predicates that we do. im not saying be stupid but the walls will be there. hurt does strange things.

Eugene. sin and repentance aslo means one has to go to the offended that you or if you are hurt and seek healing. sometimes we must forgive ourselves. I have been there. god calling past hurts to rememberance is needed. I once well was hurt by my first love. wont go into that pain but I had to grieve that loss for days. god lead me to let that go, it involved crying. we often also have learned behaviours from hurts that start with the hurt itself and must be dealt with. just because god forgives you doesn't mean you don't have to heal from the hurt. ie if hurt another and I ask forgivenvess from god I should (many don't) go to the one I hurt and reconcile. that is what I mean. god is calling up things that I did let go and saying that is driving this and you didn't know.

ie the first kiss at age 6 and my humiliation on the bus from the kids. that bothered me for years. I didn't date because I felt weird around girls and that was until my late teens. though I have let that pain go its effects were and are still there. I must then learn better ways to deal with that. it has affected my marriage on an unconscious level.

 

[jasoncran]

I will add theres far more then just forgiveness, theres also the fact for me. It was late in life to learn to drive and other things and well that made life hard for me in the army. some of the self rejection is from the fact that women wouldn't and still don't date those that cant drive, or hold a decent job. today that isn't as bad but it still goes on. I see it I hear from singles at times. that did and still does drive me to be more apt to want to learn those things which is great but the motive is wrong

maybe then I will be normal

I have had those thoughts when I bought my home. fixed a car for the first time or did more major work then I did before, being most recent the fact when I replaced the clutch on my Nissan.