Christ_empowered
Member
- Oct 23, 2010
- 14,233
- 10,718
ugh. "God's work in this world is -always- met with opposition." I read that in a big, big book on Protestant doctrine, once. I think its the only sentence I remember out of over 300 pages? And yet...
worth it.
my parents are doing well, thank God! Saw them for Sunday dinner earlier. mama's got joint pain flare ups, now and then. I gave her a big ole bottle of astaxanthin -- its a potent antioxidant I think has helped me (in my case, my energy levels are better...allergies are improved...and my facial skin deals with shaving and...life, better...) -- that's apparently been used in some small studies with success (!) in helping people w/ arthritis, etc., and...
still having flare ups. :-( but they're milder than they were, previously. I think her -big- thing right now is finding non-pharmaceutical means to hopefully, if at all possible, manage it and keep things from getting too, too bad. Please pray for her, and my dad, too.
Something...maybe something is happening? I live in a small, southern city. My parents live in a nearby small, southern town. I'll soon be 38. labeled with "severe mental illness," which...I kind of think, now, is sort of to be expected. Never really was going to amount to anything, never really a member of this or any community, "poor life choices" (read: in my case, the sins of youth, etc.), and...
yeah, about 13 years ago, both parents got big promotions, etc. God's work, most definitely. I mean...they had (and have) the credentials, etc., but...wow. cloak and dagger work place, that kinda thing. something of a miracle. so...now, they're mostly retired, not rich but solidly comfortable enough for me to have -this place- (indicates small, nice, modest place...) and...
"Schizophrenia." -shrug- I guess the "experts" have to say...something? Its...strange, because...
now, there's this green space, right out front of my place. -huge improvement- when I moved in, it was over-grown with weeds. since family own my place, they were able to get the HOA to have the maintenance people out there and at least whack down the weeds...
which they did, with much moaning and groaning in my direction, lol. ugh. -outcast- but, OK. I wouldn't want their jobs, so I get it, I guess?
a bunch of people were just out there...fun and all...except for the parts about them talking about me ("he thinks God healed him?!?!" "personality disorder!!" stuff like that...), and...yeah...
by His grace, I bore up under it OK. I offered a semi-smile (polite, not too friendly, not too aloof) to some dude who looked in my direction, got in the door, did my code for the alarm and...
--gratitude-- I live...here. not in poverty, not in a group home. not in jail, prison, state hospital, any hospital. Poverty? -not fun- I think it was extra-amazingly-not fun for me, because I was made an example of, by shrinks, etc. blah. I think...it happens, probably more in small town areas? I think the idea was that I'd end up being put away...somewhere. Prison is way, way, way more popular for putting away deviants and unwanted people, so...
long story, there was a case, I walked with a plea deal (barely avoided a felony! minor miracle!) and probation. I've been off of probation for over 5 years, now, and...
I don't understand why this is happening? lots of people with psych labels live in communities all over the US. most of us do not (often because we cannot, and not just because of psych issues...) sustain full time (or any) employment, and...
-gratitude- most people have to work. I was not (and am not) able to work, and God has seen fit to extend mega-mercy and love my way. I Praise The Lord for His grace and mercy!
blah. sorry to ramble, per usual. I was dosing off...maybe 11:30, last night...and somebody banged on the outside wall and started taunting, super loud. I have cameras, for the outside...dad's coming by at some point the near future, so I can cover the front and back. Glad the technology is there and I can use it! kinda sad its come to this...
I dunno. It isn't...that I was special or good or anything, just...wow. wow. I've been saved for nearly 10 years now. God has brought deliverance and lots of blessings to my life, Matthew 6:33 - style , especially over the past..3-4 years, I'd say. I am increasingly thankful. and...with that...
I ask for prayer -yet again- . Oh man, I know...I'm here constantly. Its hard to believe that I'm now...close to 40. I mean, its hard for me to believe, because I look in the mirror and I see...good skin, bright eyes. no wrinkles, just a couple grays here and there, and...
lots of junk gets thrown up in my face, and I think a lot of it has probably been never ending since I graduated HS at 16 and then was driven out of the dorms at 17 and...
I dunno. God is Good! My parents are amazing, too. Most parents would have had me put away, somewhere socially acceptable...group home, maybe one of the few long term spots available in the state hospital (?)...
my parents cashed in some investments and got this place. I see them, mostly at their house, on a regular basis. God is moving in our lives, and He's changed me, through and through...
my parents new set of house dogs -love me- . I mean...seems like a small thing, but its like...OK, "Schizophrenia," very supportive and wonderful parents, not creepy or off putting, healthy and apparently I have a "high IQ (estimate...I think based on material I've written?)," and...and...
He has seen fit to "...put off the old, put on the new..." in big, big, big...meaningful...ways. I am grateful. Understandably, the taunts and such...make it harder to grab ahold of the joy I should have, but...
even there, God is making things better, for me and my parents and our lives...
rambling, sorry. Dad called today, randomly. I was actually...pulling into their place, to see what was going on, when I saw the missed call. He'd called not even 5 minutes prior. and...
he said it was just to check in on me. -real concern- , despite...everything that came before. God is Love, after all.
blah. the taunts get kind of intense. its unnerving, because I -do- take my atypical (fun fact: please avoid antipsychotics if you can, but I will say that if one absolutely -needs- one, abilify is apparently good, not just for me, but for lots of people...) and I don't know these people, and...
rambling. outcasts, modern society...
did I mention that even though my last grocery trip was rough on the snark in, I was all sorts of able to handle it, in Christ? got the goods, paid, rolled out. and...
sorry to ramble. I really am. I think it makes me come off as more "distressed" than I truly am. Not so much distressed, as...who are these people? what's going on around me? that kind of stuff. got gas today, some dude was saying "...when he gets out of the mental hospital...," and...
I'm considered "high functioning" (blessing, trust me...) and I've never been to a state facility (another blessing...), never been committed, never been convicted of a felony or in prison, but...
I dunno. one bad thing about private hospitals: they always want more $$$. and...I ended up filing legal action, because of the heavy over-medication, heavy use of controlled substances, all that junk. so...-eek- I think I triggered some craziness...from my shrinks, lol. -eek-
ok. finished, for now. Thanks, as always.
worth it.
my parents are doing well, thank God! Saw them for Sunday dinner earlier. mama's got joint pain flare ups, now and then. I gave her a big ole bottle of astaxanthin -- its a potent antioxidant I think has helped me (in my case, my energy levels are better...allergies are improved...and my facial skin deals with shaving and...life, better...) -- that's apparently been used in some small studies with success (!) in helping people w/ arthritis, etc., and...
still having flare ups. :-( but they're milder than they were, previously. I think her -big- thing right now is finding non-pharmaceutical means to hopefully, if at all possible, manage it and keep things from getting too, too bad. Please pray for her, and my dad, too.
Something...maybe something is happening? I live in a small, southern city. My parents live in a nearby small, southern town. I'll soon be 38. labeled with "severe mental illness," which...I kind of think, now, is sort of to be expected. Never really was going to amount to anything, never really a member of this or any community, "poor life choices" (read: in my case, the sins of youth, etc.), and...
yeah, about 13 years ago, both parents got big promotions, etc. God's work, most definitely. I mean...they had (and have) the credentials, etc., but...wow. cloak and dagger work place, that kinda thing. something of a miracle. so...now, they're mostly retired, not rich but solidly comfortable enough for me to have -this place- (indicates small, nice, modest place...) and...
"Schizophrenia." -shrug- I guess the "experts" have to say...something? Its...strange, because...
now, there's this green space, right out front of my place. -huge improvement- when I moved in, it was over-grown with weeds. since family own my place, they were able to get the HOA to have the maintenance people out there and at least whack down the weeds...
which they did, with much moaning and groaning in my direction, lol. ugh. -outcast- but, OK. I wouldn't want their jobs, so I get it, I guess?
a bunch of people were just out there...fun and all...except for the parts about them talking about me ("he thinks God healed him?!?!" "personality disorder!!" stuff like that...), and...yeah...
by His grace, I bore up under it OK. I offered a semi-smile (polite, not too friendly, not too aloof) to some dude who looked in my direction, got in the door, did my code for the alarm and...
--gratitude-- I live...here. not in poverty, not in a group home. not in jail, prison, state hospital, any hospital. Poverty? -not fun- I think it was extra-amazingly-not fun for me, because I was made an example of, by shrinks, etc. blah. I think...it happens, probably more in small town areas? I think the idea was that I'd end up being put away...somewhere. Prison is way, way, way more popular for putting away deviants and unwanted people, so...
long story, there was a case, I walked with a plea deal (barely avoided a felony! minor miracle!) and probation. I've been off of probation for over 5 years, now, and...
I don't understand why this is happening? lots of people with psych labels live in communities all over the US. most of us do not (often because we cannot, and not just because of psych issues...) sustain full time (or any) employment, and...
-gratitude- most people have to work. I was not (and am not) able to work, and God has seen fit to extend mega-mercy and love my way. I Praise The Lord for His grace and mercy!
blah. sorry to ramble, per usual. I was dosing off...maybe 11:30, last night...and somebody banged on the outside wall and started taunting, super loud. I have cameras, for the outside...dad's coming by at some point the near future, so I can cover the front and back. Glad the technology is there and I can use it! kinda sad its come to this...
I dunno. It isn't...that I was special or good or anything, just...wow. wow. I've been saved for nearly 10 years now. God has brought deliverance and lots of blessings to my life, Matthew 6:33 - style , especially over the past..3-4 years, I'd say. I am increasingly thankful. and...with that...
I ask for prayer -yet again- . Oh man, I know...I'm here constantly. Its hard to believe that I'm now...close to 40. I mean, its hard for me to believe, because I look in the mirror and I see...good skin, bright eyes. no wrinkles, just a couple grays here and there, and...
lots of junk gets thrown up in my face, and I think a lot of it has probably been never ending since I graduated HS at 16 and then was driven out of the dorms at 17 and...
I dunno. God is Good! My parents are amazing, too. Most parents would have had me put away, somewhere socially acceptable...group home, maybe one of the few long term spots available in the state hospital (?)...
my parents cashed in some investments and got this place. I see them, mostly at their house, on a regular basis. God is moving in our lives, and He's changed me, through and through...
my parents new set of house dogs -love me- . I mean...seems like a small thing, but its like...OK, "Schizophrenia," very supportive and wonderful parents, not creepy or off putting, healthy and apparently I have a "high IQ (estimate...I think based on material I've written?)," and...and...
He has seen fit to "...put off the old, put on the new..." in big, big, big...meaningful...ways. I am grateful. Understandably, the taunts and such...make it harder to grab ahold of the joy I should have, but...
even there, God is making things better, for me and my parents and our lives...
rambling, sorry. Dad called today, randomly. I was actually...pulling into their place, to see what was going on, when I saw the missed call. He'd called not even 5 minutes prior. and...
he said it was just to check in on me. -real concern- , despite...everything that came before. God is Love, after all.
blah. the taunts get kind of intense. its unnerving, because I -do- take my atypical (fun fact: please avoid antipsychotics if you can, but I will say that if one absolutely -needs- one, abilify is apparently good, not just for me, but for lots of people...) and I don't know these people, and...
rambling. outcasts, modern society...
did I mention that even though my last grocery trip was rough on the snark in, I was all sorts of able to handle it, in Christ? got the goods, paid, rolled out. and...
sorry to ramble. I really am. I think it makes me come off as more "distressed" than I truly am. Not so much distressed, as...who are these people? what's going on around me? that kind of stuff. got gas today, some dude was saying "...when he gets out of the mental hospital...," and...
I'm considered "high functioning" (blessing, trust me...) and I've never been to a state facility (another blessing...), never been committed, never been convicted of a felony or in prison, but...
I dunno. one bad thing about private hospitals: they always want more $$$. and...I ended up filing legal action, because of the heavy over-medication, heavy use of controlled substances, all that junk. so...-eek- I think I triggered some craziness...from my shrinks, lol. -eek-
ok. finished, for now. Thanks, as always.