Dear Sister
Eboni Gray, you might associate with Mar 9:24 . . . Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.
Christians have battles. Have you fought bad thoughts, thought stupidly, and wonder if you're saved; how can these things be even in prayer if you're really in Christ?
John Bunyan had similar thinking. The following is an excerpt from his book "Pilgrim's Progress". Wicked ones whispered to Christian (The main character) on his trip from the city of destruction to the celestial city.
One thing I would not let slip; I took notice that now poor CHRISTIAN was so confounded, that he did not know his own voice. And thus I perceived it: just when he was come over against the mouth of the burning pit, one of the wicked ones got behind him, and stept up softly to him; and whisperingly suggested many grievous blasphemies to him--which he verily thought had proceeded from his own mind. This put CHRISTIAN more to it than anything that he met with before, even to think that he should now blaspheme him that he loved so much before! Yet could he have helped it, he would not have done it; but he had not the discretion neither to stop his ears, nor to know from whence those blasphemies came.
Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Genesis 3:1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said? . .
Blessings in Christ Jesus.