W,
I agree there is a fear that is not good and there is a fear that is essential. John tells us
...By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. (1 John 4:17-18 ESV)
So the not-good fear is a born-again believer's fear of punishment. On the other hand I cannot imagine a person knowing and valuing God without fearing him in other ways.
If God really is the one who a person values and esteems infinitely above all else, then that person will walk with a constant consuming concern - i.e. fear - of what God's opinion is of everything. I think this is at least in part what it means to "...work out your salvation with fear and trembling..." A fear like this would lead a person to never say "God is my co-pilot" or "It's okay to angrily tell God all you think he has done wrong."
I once stood within touching distance of a motor that was about 4 feet in diameter and rotating at high speed. I remember the sense of uneasiness to be next to such power. (Being an engineer, I am aware to some degree of the huge forces involved in such a mass moving at high speed.) I think such uneasiness - i.e. fear - is another healthy way of fearing my God. When I think of the degree of his power, I long to feel the uneasiness of it while knowing I am safe.
Much of the glibness and silliness of western Christianity would dissipate if we had a healthy fear of God. Our faith would be a very serious, yet joyful, pursuit of the Holy.
Between home life and church life I have had very little time to be on the forum. I do check in often and read, but avoid getting to much dialog going.