Like I inboxed a friend:
"I'm sick of people thinking I'm a joke around here.
I've been through a whole lot, being a punchbag at school and home. As if the bullying at school wasn't enough so my parents would have fun taking their frustrations out on me and at 13 I got raped by a bully in school and that same year my cousin was brutally stabbed to death by gang members and left to die.
I struggled with addiction to painkillers, valium and alcohol to block out the torment.
The I was in and out of hospital because I tried to kill myself.
On Christmas day, I found out my biological father sexually abused me as a baby and toddler and it's so hard accepting as well as telling the police about it then I have to face public humiliation by watching people mock me because I'm disabled both mentally and physically and now I have to put up with guys like this.
I get bullied enough OFFline as well as online.
I don't need this.
If this carries on I'm just going to do it I mean it's not like anyone cares anymore, the sooner the better because I can tell I'm a burden on all of you and you're all fed up with me talking about my depression and struggle with my faith.
So I'll save you all the trouble and just get the job done!"
I don't think I was even welcomed on here, I'm different from everyone else and I just don't want to be pictured negative anymore but the longer I'm alive the negativity will continue to grow.
I know it's considered a sin for someone to take their own life but it pains me to face the fact that I'm just a complete freak and people only feel sorry for me and that I'm literally nothing. When I get off this site, there's nothing there for me except an abusive family that couldn't care less if I was alive or dead and the people on the streets that torment and mock me for how I speak, walk etc.
When you've been told you're whole life you're nothing but awful things, your brain will forever think that.
I envy the people who were born beautiful, I would give anything just to feel accepted, loved and wanted, even if it were just for a few minutes never mind a day, I'd give anything for that wonderful warm feeling but the truth of reality is I'm always going to be... Ugly and creepy in other people's eyes.
Goodbye everyone.
And have fun mocking me on this thread ——- like you always do.
God bless you all for trying your best to save me.
"I'm sick of people thinking I'm a joke around here.
I've been through a whole lot, being a punchbag at school and home. As if the bullying at school wasn't enough so my parents would have fun taking their frustrations out on me and at 13 I got raped by a bully in school and that same year my cousin was brutally stabbed to death by gang members and left to die.
I struggled with addiction to painkillers, valium and alcohol to block out the torment.
The I was in and out of hospital because I tried to kill myself.
On Christmas day, I found out my biological father sexually abused me as a baby and toddler and it's so hard accepting as well as telling the police about it then I have to face public humiliation by watching people mock me because I'm disabled both mentally and physically and now I have to put up with guys like this.
I get bullied enough OFFline as well as online.
I don't need this.
If this carries on I'm just going to do it I mean it's not like anyone cares anymore, the sooner the better because I can tell I'm a burden on all of you and you're all fed up with me talking about my depression and struggle with my faith.
So I'll save you all the trouble and just get the job done!"
I don't think I was even welcomed on here, I'm different from everyone else and I just don't want to be pictured negative anymore but the longer I'm alive the negativity will continue to grow.
I know it's considered a sin for someone to take their own life but it pains me to face the fact that I'm just a complete freak and people only feel sorry for me and that I'm literally nothing. When I get off this site, there's nothing there for me except an abusive family that couldn't care less if I was alive or dead and the people on the streets that torment and mock me for how I speak, walk etc.
When you've been told you're whole life you're nothing but awful things, your brain will forever think that.
I envy the people who were born beautiful, I would give anything just to feel accepted, loved and wanted, even if it were just for a few minutes never mind a day, I'd give anything for that wonderful warm feeling but the truth of reality is I'm always going to be... Ugly and creepy in other people's eyes.
Goodbye everyone.
And have fun mocking me on this thread ——- like you always do.
God bless you all for trying your best to save me.
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