Christ_empowered
Member
- Oct 23, 2010
- 14,390
- 10,878
me, yet again. happens... 
Overall, I'd say I'm doing...well! I mean...reduced tranquilizer/"antipsychotic" dosage (in the range, just lower end...I am fortunate to be able to work -with- my current prescriber, she seems awesome...), and...and...
yeah. I live in a nice, modest place. Yay! family own it. by the grace of God, they were able to buy it outright, no mortgage. not saying that to brag, just...it makes -me- feel better, especially since Zillow tells me the value has gone way up, so its definitely done better than the investments some company was doing with the same funds was doing. and also...
yeah. only off spring, loved despite ongoing flaws and a sinful, shady, wasted pre-Jesus existence. -Praise God!-
so, I was over at my parents' house, letting their little house dogs out for a break (parents asked me to do it). So...by His grace, I'm far, far, far less fearful than in years past. This is a -big- deal, given a lifetime of bullying, plus my own sins and a fallen world all coming together to equal...well, I'm labeled "Schizophrenic," let's put it that way. moving on...
I live in a small city near my parents' small town. some neighbor out back was all "I don't care if they own it! He -cannot- live at ( )!" and this other junk, and...
whaaa? I've actually been here almost 4 years now. The people selling it were willing to let it go for asking, in cash/check, and leave it furnished...
basically, the day it closed, I was here with a tooth brush, read to start the next chapter of my life in Christ.
ok. so, I'm frustrated and...anxious, a bit? but not as fearful as in years past. no where near the powerless freak-out/paranoia that I'd get in years past. -God is Good!-
oh, and...I apparently have a "high IQ (estimate)." I think the estimate is from some writing (long story). That's all I can come up with, because I haven't taken any actual IQ -test- or anything. I've read that "professionals" can estimate within 10 points, after having treated someone long enough. I don't know how accurate that is, but...145, 150 are the numbers I keep hearing tossed around. And...
I was estimated to be at around 120, pre-treatment. At a low point, I was at 95, which...honestly, isn't -terrible- , but with obvious brain damage, paranoia, stigma, and physical illnesses on board...-eeek- insult to injury, lol.
Now? Almost 10 years into truly knowing Jesus, I'm healthy and remarkably normal and...I don't even flame gay, which is a blessing (fun fact: the world at large is cruel to flamers...the gay community is often -worse-)...
yeah, 145 150. what does -that mean- though? And...to what end? I was driven out of the dorms at 17, driven out of tech schools and college in my early 20s...
did a bunch of online college classes and those were awesome, mostly. I mean...some instructor were snide, even online, and...wow. probably too sensitive, but...I was hoping the format would eliminate all that junk.
rambling...
Overall, doing well. God is Good! Even when I'm not doing well...He's in control, amen.
but...yeah. "he cannot live at ( ) !" and the thing is...
the mental health industry has shown itself to be -so cruel- and truly -antidemocratic- towards my family in me, in years past...
that I don't think its simply (irrational) fear, or overreacting to bullying. its just such...unending cruelty, that I was subjected to, till Jesus intervened. Thank -God- I never had to go to the state hospital! oh man...even these days, people go in there, they come out severely brain damaged, sick, -and- the laws allow the state to exert all kinds of control over them. no thanks, y'all.
ok. thanks!
Overall, I'd say I'm doing...well! I mean...reduced tranquilizer/"antipsychotic" dosage (in the range, just lower end...I am fortunate to be able to work -with- my current prescriber, she seems awesome...), and...and...
yeah. I live in a nice, modest place. Yay!
family own it. by the grace of God, they were able to buy it outright, no mortgage. not saying that to brag, just...it makes -me- feel better, especially since Zillow tells me the value has gone way up, so its definitely done better than the investments some company was doing with the same funds was doing. and also...yeah. only off spring, loved despite ongoing flaws and a sinful, shady, wasted pre-Jesus existence. -Praise God!-
so, I was over at my parents' house, letting their little house dogs out for a break (parents asked me to do it). So...by His grace, I'm far, far, far less fearful than in years past. This is a -big- deal, given a lifetime of bullying, plus my own sins and a fallen world all coming together to equal...well, I'm labeled "Schizophrenic," let's put it that way. moving on...
I live in a small city near my parents' small town. some neighbor out back was all "I don't care if they own it! He -cannot- live at ( )!" and this other junk, and...
whaaa? I've actually been here almost 4 years now. The people selling it were willing to let it go for asking, in cash/check, and leave it furnished...
basically, the day it closed, I was here with a tooth brush, read to start the next chapter of my life in Christ.
ok. so, I'm frustrated and...anxious, a bit? but not as fearful as in years past. no where near the powerless freak-out/paranoia that I'd get in years past. -God is Good!-
oh, and...I apparently have a "high IQ (estimate)." I think the estimate is from some writing (long story). That's all I can come up with, because I haven't taken any actual IQ -test- or anything. I've read that "professionals" can estimate within 10 points, after having treated someone long enough. I don't know how accurate that is, but...145, 150 are the numbers I keep hearing tossed around. And...
I was estimated to be at around 120, pre-treatment. At a low point, I was at 95, which...honestly, isn't -terrible- , but with obvious brain damage, paranoia, stigma, and physical illnesses on board...-eeek- insult to injury, lol.
Now? Almost 10 years into truly knowing Jesus, I'm healthy and remarkably normal and...I don't even flame gay, which is a blessing (fun fact: the world at large is cruel to flamers...the gay community is often -worse-)...
yeah, 145 150. what does -that mean- though? And...to what end? I was driven out of the dorms at 17, driven out of tech schools and college in my early 20s...
did a bunch of online college classes and those were awesome, mostly. I mean...some instructor were snide, even online, and...wow. probably too sensitive, but...I was hoping the format would eliminate all that junk.
rambling...
Overall, doing well. God is Good! Even when I'm not doing well...He's in control, amen.
but...yeah. "he cannot live at ( ) !" and the thing is...
the mental health industry has shown itself to be -so cruel- and truly -antidemocratic- towards my family in me, in years past...
that I don't think its simply (irrational) fear, or overreacting to bullying. its just such...unending cruelty, that I was subjected to, till Jesus intervened. Thank -God- I never had to go to the state hospital! oh man...even these days, people go in there, they come out severely brain damaged, sick, -and- the laws allow the state to exert all kinds of control over them. no thanks, y'all.
ok. thanks!
