You're welcome
Dear brother, the advice given by your family in Christ so far are very true, and you should take it.
Most of us have been there, and we're still here to testify. Everything God does is for our good. When you feel there are walls you cannot pass through, trust in God with all your heart. When you say you "think" you are being honest with God, that may be the problem. You must "Be" totally honest with Him, repent, forgive those who have trespassed against you. Question yourself with what is right with God: are you following false prophets etc. The answer to our troubles begin with ourselves, we do not have to be there and there's always a way out. It may be that you are holding on to something keeping you there, whatever it is, it must be dealt with quickly.
I apologize if I am too hard but I do sympathise with your situation and we know it is hard and depressing.
Do not give up
