I grew up in a Christian family. We went to church every Sunday. I went to Vacation Bible School in the Summer. I have to admit, I was never too nuts about Christianity, or religion for that matter. Even though I was brought up in a Christian family, I would question the validity of it. My family was poor and I always questioned why my father was so dedicated to it. I used to ask myself, "Why is my father so dedicated to this? What is he getting out of this? Here we are, struggling every day and he still continues to kneel before this "god"? Basically, I rejected God, for the most part and paid little attention to Him during my young adult life. It wasn't until I began to experience things in my life that I could not explain. I would be sick for days for some unknown reason. I didn't know why. One day, someone pointed out passages in the Bible that explained to me why I was feeling sick. It was because of sin. I was sinning, even though I didn't recognize it as sin, God did. When I stopped doing these things, I became healthier. I soon realized that God was telling me something. I don't know why He cared about me because I certainly didn't care about Him. I think, to this day, it was because of my father. I sincerely belive my father prayed for me and God listened. I believe when my father took his last breath on this earth, he asked God to look over me, and He has. Since I have come to realize what God represents is indeed good and worthy, I have become a believer. Not because I grew up in a Christian family but because God Himself has shown Himself to me.
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[ Testimony ] How did you get saved?
- Thread starter Caroline H
- Start date
sheshisown
Member
Well, I was eight years old, staying with my Dad after my mom had become too ill to keep us three girls. They had been divorced since I was four. But he was extremely abusive to us and I learned to fear and to hate him. I often wished he would die. :verysad
But he had remarried, and she went to church, though he would not allow us to go along. And, her Dad was the pastor, we called him Grandpa Owen. He was both a family member and a stranger to me. He came to lunch after many Sunday services, but he was not allowed to talk to us much. He told my Dad that we needed to be taught, to be "good" kids. So my Dad said he could teach us~ but only in our living room because he hated churches.
Then Grandpa Owen preached to us about Jesus all summer, each Sunday from the Bible. I knew I needed to be forgiven for hating my Dad and wanting him to die, so when he asked if any of us wanted to be forgiven by Jesus and His death on the cross~ I raised my hand, and asked Jesus to forgive me, and to save me~
Within one week, my Mom came to take us out of my Dad's house, and I never had to be around him again. From that time forward the Lord kept saving me from all kinds of terrible situations and people and circumstances. I could go on for way too long about it~
But I was not a disciple, a follower of Jesus. I was a Christian who was carnal, I lived just like the rest of the world for 32 years. At 40~ I finally got to the end of my own resources, and started listening to J. Vernon Magee on the radio each day. He was a stranger, I never met him, he died before I heard him preach. One day he was teaching in Revelation chapter 3:16-18 and he read it aloud saying;
So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth. Because you say, 'I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing'--and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked-- I counsel you to buy from Me gold refined in the fire, that you may be rich; and white garments, that you may be clothed, that the shame of your nakedness may not be revealed; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see.
Not a very pretty message was it? But I had already aborted more than one child~ and I was destroying my own two daughters by ignoring them~ a murderess, an abusive parent~ a fool in many things. That was me. I fell on my knees and prayed a second time, only this time for the Lord to be my King, my Lord, and I gave Him my life to do with as He willed. :yes
AND ~ He gave me His love to keep me constrained~ He gives me His life to live for Him~ He saved my children and is saving my grand children, one by one... He was faithful~ when I was faithless, for He cannot deny Himself. :D He made me His Sunday school teacher, though I cannot understand it~ I do not deserve to serve Him. To serve children so tender and loving. He made me a lover of His word, and a woman who may be counted on, I was such a flake before Him. He caused me to desire contentment not things. He has rekindled my daughters love for me, and made me a good grand~mom. THAT is amazing!
God knows how I am filled with His praise for such miracles! No words or cries from within me can speak the honor and glory He deserves from my heart forever! Awe and wonderful are words ~far too small to describe His grace and mercy and marvelous love!
:heart sheshisown~
But he had remarried, and she went to church, though he would not allow us to go along. And, her Dad was the pastor, we called him Grandpa Owen. He was both a family member and a stranger to me. He came to lunch after many Sunday services, but he was not allowed to talk to us much. He told my Dad that we needed to be taught, to be "good" kids. So my Dad said he could teach us~ but only in our living room because he hated churches.
Then Grandpa Owen preached to us about Jesus all summer, each Sunday from the Bible. I knew I needed to be forgiven for hating my Dad and wanting him to die, so when he asked if any of us wanted to be forgiven by Jesus and His death on the cross~ I raised my hand, and asked Jesus to forgive me, and to save me~
Within one week, my Mom came to take us out of my Dad's house, and I never had to be around him again. From that time forward the Lord kept saving me from all kinds of terrible situations and people and circumstances. I could go on for way too long about it~
But I was not a disciple, a follower of Jesus. I was a Christian who was carnal, I lived just like the rest of the world for 32 years. At 40~ I finally got to the end of my own resources, and started listening to J. Vernon Magee on the radio each day. He was a stranger, I never met him, he died before I heard him preach. One day he was teaching in Revelation chapter 3:16-18 and he read it aloud saying;
So then, because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will vomit you out of My mouth. Because you say, 'I am rich, have become wealthy, and have need of nothing'--and do not know that you are wretched, miserable, poor, blind, and naked-- I counsel you to buy from Me gold refined in the fire, that you may be rich; and white garments, that you may be clothed, that the shame of your nakedness may not be revealed; and anoint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see.
Not a very pretty message was it? But I had already aborted more than one child~ and I was destroying my own two daughters by ignoring them~ a murderess, an abusive parent~ a fool in many things. That was me. I fell on my knees and prayed a second time, only this time for the Lord to be my King, my Lord, and I gave Him my life to do with as He willed. :yes
AND ~ He gave me His love to keep me constrained~ He gives me His life to live for Him~ He saved my children and is saving my grand children, one by one... He was faithful~ when I was faithless, for He cannot deny Himself. :D He made me His Sunday school teacher, though I cannot understand it~ I do not deserve to serve Him. To serve children so tender and loving. He made me a lover of His word, and a woman who may be counted on, I was such a flake before Him. He caused me to desire contentment not things. He has rekindled my daughters love for me, and made me a good grand~mom. THAT is amazing!
God knows how I am filled with His praise for such miracles! No words or cries from within me can speak the honor and glory He deserves from my heart forever! Awe and wonderful are words ~far too small to describe His grace and mercy and marvelous love!
:heart sheshisown~
NinaMMitchell
Member
Like almost everyone else has said, I grew up in a Christian home. I went to a Baptist church with my mom and sister on a regular basis until I was 15 years old when our preacher was voted out of the church. The people that voted for him followed him to another church that let us use their sanctuary. I went for a few weeks and then stopped going. Truthfully I haven't been back to church on a regular basis since, and that was probably 8 years ago. Well, I remember the first time I asked Jesus into my heart. I was 3 years old, standing in the corner of the playroom (which is now my bedroom), playing with a doll, and I just said a prayer for Jesus to come into my heart. I don't know why I did. But I was only 3 then, so I don't know if I really understood what it meant.
Well, my life went on. I was never a popular kid. I always had friends, though not many, and I had been tormented from a young age about how skinny I was (still am. It's not as great as people think). People would stare at me, whisper to eachother about me, make fun of me. People based who I was as a person on my outward appearance. I'm not really unnatractive, just underwieght. So my entire life, to this day, I have dealt with EXTREME self image problems and little to no self-esteem. Just a little background.
Anyway, I never really had a true relationship with Jesus. I was always a good kid, but God was not first in my life. Well, I remember one night, not too many years ago, when I was still a teenager, I was laying in bed. I was contemplating why God needs angels when He is capable of all things (I still wonder). I remembered hearing how angels are with you sometimes, but Jesus is with you all the time. And I remember praying earnestly, "Lord, I don't want an angel with me, I only want you with me". And I felt the most amazing feeling come over me. It felt EXACTLY like someone giving me the most sincere, love-filled hug you could ever imagine. It was so peaceful and comforting. I will never, ever forget that night, alone in the dark, with Jesus' arms around me. But still, it was not the turning point in my life.
I dated a little bit in highschool. I met a boy in 9th grade, we dated for a couple of months and then broke up. We maintained friends, or as we called it, friends with benefits. Well, he dated girl after girl while continuing to lead me on. I could not get over him no matter how hard I tried. I thought I was SO in love with him (I now know love and obsession are two different things). I went out with a couple of other boys, but none of them freed me of the bondage he had me in. Well, in March of my senior year (2006) I met the man that changed everything. We started dating and I tossed the old guy aside without a second thought (Thank GOD). He was a Christian too, but we were in about the same place in our relationship with Jesus, and it wasn't the most important thing.
Well, about 5 monts into our relationship, I started experiencing EXTREME doubt about our relationship, i.e. I thought I didn't love him and didn't want to be with him. I knew that he loved me more than anything in the world, and all this caused me agonizing anxiety. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and when I was consumed in this doubt and anxiety, it got so intense it would make me shake; like an anxiety attack. To make a long story short, I broke up with him, and then we shortly got back together because I realized (I knew in my heart all along) that I had made a mistake. So things went forward, we were in love and we were happy. But then it happened again four months later. We didn't break up this time but just worked through it.
There have been several times throughout our relationship when we have vowed to dedicate our lives to God, but it was always short lived. Well, in July of 09, less than a year ago, those horrible, agonizing doubts came back with a vengence, worse than they had ever been. We had come so far in our relationship. We loved eachother so much and had planned our lives toghether, and now THIS again. I was miserable and he was miserable. It came down to one day, he had come by to see my sister and niece, who were visiting from Georgia, and we left and went to Chick-fil-A. But I was so consumed with this anxiety and doubt that I couldn't eat, and he got to the point where he had had enough of my doubt, and we got in my car so I could take him home. Well, while we were in the car, we could tell that I was about to break up with him, and he got so mad and upset that he had a siezure (he does have a siezure disorder, but hadn't had one in a long time). Well, I got him home, took him inside b/c he was out of it and disoriented. We sat down on the couch and I remember him putting his head in my lap and hugging me because he didn't want me to leave him, and he was still disoriented. When he was starting to get a little more "oriented" (if that's a word), he started praying for God to open my eyes, that God would show me what He'd shown him. Then, it was like the spirit of God came over him, and he started telling me things that had happened recently in my life, things I hadn't told him about. Among other things, He told me how one night I was laying in bed and I felt something touch me, and that God was telling him that was Him (Him/He=God, him/he=my b/f). God showed him our lives then, he showed him that we would be married soon and that we would have 3 boys. He even showed him a blurry picture of one of our kids. He even spoke in tongues, which I had never heard before, and it had never happened before. My boyfriend told me that God told him there was something in me, causing me to feel these doubts, but that after this night, it would be gone. He told me that once we are married, everything in our lives would start coming together. He told me how much God loves me, and that when God thinks of me, He smiles. And he told me these things under the influence of the Holy Spirit. But that night changed our lives. It was a miracle. When I went home that night I felt renewed and happy for the first time since those agonizing doubts came over me. I can't fully describe everything that happened that night, but since that night Jesus has been the love of our lives. I have a relationship with Him now, and my b/f of over 4 years, and I, put Him first in our lives. I still need to be baptized though, and he wants to get re-baptized, b/c he was baptized as a child, but didn't understand the meaning. And there you have it.
Well, my life went on. I was never a popular kid. I always had friends, though not many, and I had been tormented from a young age about how skinny I was (still am. It's not as great as people think). People would stare at me, whisper to eachother about me, make fun of me. People based who I was as a person on my outward appearance. I'm not really unnatractive, just underwieght. So my entire life, to this day, I have dealt with EXTREME self image problems and little to no self-esteem. Just a little background.
Anyway, I never really had a true relationship with Jesus. I was always a good kid, but God was not first in my life. Well, I remember one night, not too many years ago, when I was still a teenager, I was laying in bed. I was contemplating why God needs angels when He is capable of all things (I still wonder). I remembered hearing how angels are with you sometimes, but Jesus is with you all the time. And I remember praying earnestly, "Lord, I don't want an angel with me, I only want you with me". And I felt the most amazing feeling come over me. It felt EXACTLY like someone giving me the most sincere, love-filled hug you could ever imagine. It was so peaceful and comforting. I will never, ever forget that night, alone in the dark, with Jesus' arms around me. But still, it was not the turning point in my life.
I dated a little bit in highschool. I met a boy in 9th grade, we dated for a couple of months and then broke up. We maintained friends, or as we called it, friends with benefits. Well, he dated girl after girl while continuing to lead me on. I could not get over him no matter how hard I tried. I thought I was SO in love with him (I now know love and obsession are two different things). I went out with a couple of other boys, but none of them freed me of the bondage he had me in. Well, in March of my senior year (2006) I met the man that changed everything. We started dating and I tossed the old guy aside without a second thought (Thank GOD). He was a Christian too, but we were in about the same place in our relationship with Jesus, and it wasn't the most important thing.
Well, about 5 monts into our relationship, I started experiencing EXTREME doubt about our relationship, i.e. I thought I didn't love him and didn't want to be with him. I knew that he loved me more than anything in the world, and all this caused me agonizing anxiety. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and when I was consumed in this doubt and anxiety, it got so intense it would make me shake; like an anxiety attack. To make a long story short, I broke up with him, and then we shortly got back together because I realized (I knew in my heart all along) that I had made a mistake. So things went forward, we were in love and we were happy. But then it happened again four months later. We didn't break up this time but just worked through it.
There have been several times throughout our relationship when we have vowed to dedicate our lives to God, but it was always short lived. Well, in July of 09, less than a year ago, those horrible, agonizing doubts came back with a vengence, worse than they had ever been. We had come so far in our relationship. We loved eachother so much and had planned our lives toghether, and now THIS again. I was miserable and he was miserable. It came down to one day, he had come by to see my sister and niece, who were visiting from Georgia, and we left and went to Chick-fil-A. But I was so consumed with this anxiety and doubt that I couldn't eat, and he got to the point where he had had enough of my doubt, and we got in my car so I could take him home. Well, while we were in the car, we could tell that I was about to break up with him, and he got so mad and upset that he had a siezure (he does have a siezure disorder, but hadn't had one in a long time). Well, I got him home, took him inside b/c he was out of it and disoriented. We sat down on the couch and I remember him putting his head in my lap and hugging me because he didn't want me to leave him, and he was still disoriented. When he was starting to get a little more "oriented" (if that's a word), he started praying for God to open my eyes, that God would show me what He'd shown him. Then, it was like the spirit of God came over him, and he started telling me things that had happened recently in my life, things I hadn't told him about. Among other things, He told me how one night I was laying in bed and I felt something touch me, and that God was telling him that was Him (Him/He=God, him/he=my b/f). God showed him our lives then, he showed him that we would be married soon and that we would have 3 boys. He even showed him a blurry picture of one of our kids. He even spoke in tongues, which I had never heard before, and it had never happened before. My boyfriend told me that God told him there was something in me, causing me to feel these doubts, but that after this night, it would be gone. He told me that once we are married, everything in our lives would start coming together. He told me how much God loves me, and that when God thinks of me, He smiles. And he told me these things under the influence of the Holy Spirit. But that night changed our lives. It was a miracle. When I went home that night I felt renewed and happy for the first time since those agonizing doubts came over me. I can't fully describe everything that happened that night, but since that night Jesus has been the love of our lives. I have a relationship with Him now, and my b/f of over 4 years, and I, put Him first in our lives. I still need to be baptized though, and he wants to get re-baptized, b/c he was baptized as a child, but didn't understand the meaning. And there you have it.
I first started talking with God as a little girl in a playhouse.. Then I heard the Gospel before I was 13 (not sure when) and went forward at the invitation. I prayed to receive Christ but I didn't know much about my need to be saved from sin.. So, in all actuality I'm not sure I was really saved. The invitation at that Crusade was to receive him as a friend..I'm not sure it is the same thing, and could be why I have trouble with assurance. Could be I never will understand my need for Christ as Savior. I know he has always been there for me, but I have relationship "issues".. with God. I never know where I'm at with Him. I went to Church for 10 years without missing a service (hardly).. and when I got divorced I got away from Church (didn't live nearby anymore) and my faith now amounts to approximately *nothing*
I hope before his return I can get this figured out.. at best just be caught up!!
o ye of little faith, comes to mind
I hope before his return I can get this figured out.. at best just be caught up!!
o ye of little faith, comes to mind
NinaMMitchell
Member
poohbah said:
I've had "relationship problems with God" before. If you ever want someone to talk to about this, maybe I can help you out. :P
L
lamplady
Guest
Good thread ... 
...
It was a series of events for me.
I was in New York, America, I was very young and my Gr8 Aunt gave me a bible. I can't recall reading it at the time but I did about five years later as I was in a very very terrible place. But it's one of those things where you don't realise it at the time but only when time has passed you wonder how you got through.
I was on my way to a post box to post a letter to my aunt and just as I posted it a clear voice, (God), said to me, 'It's too late'. Turned out my aunt died that day.
Inside the bible my aunt inscribed: 'Remember thy creator in the days of thy youth'. And I remember reading it after I posted the letter.
I don't how much time later past but I was on a road and at the top of the road opposite was a church. I kept thinking even before I reached it, whether I should go in and when I reached it I thought I would.
I popped my head round a pillar and the congregation was in full swing but when some saw me they all welcomed me. Turned out all of them knew me, (most of them were way older), because my mother apparently sent me to this same church when I was a child - must had been practically a baby because I couldn't recall a thing and my parents especially my dad were never strong church-goers let alone Christians.
Anyway fast forward time I stayed with this church and was baptised when I was 18.
There's quite a bit missed out and like I said it's a series of events but that's when I got to being baptised at least ...
...It was a series of events for me.
I was in New York, America, I was very young and my Gr8 Aunt gave me a bible. I can't recall reading it at the time but I did about five years later as I was in a very very terrible place. But it's one of those things where you don't realise it at the time but only when time has passed you wonder how you got through.
I was on my way to a post box to post a letter to my aunt and just as I posted it a clear voice, (God), said to me, 'It's too late'. Turned out my aunt died that day.
Inside the bible my aunt inscribed: 'Remember thy creator in the days of thy youth'. And I remember reading it after I posted the letter.
I don't how much time later past but I was on a road and at the top of the road opposite was a church. I kept thinking even before I reached it, whether I should go in and when I reached it I thought I would.
I popped my head round a pillar and the congregation was in full swing but when some saw me they all welcomed me. Turned out all of them knew me, (most of them were way older), because my mother apparently sent me to this same church when I was a child - must had been practically a baby because I couldn't recall a thing and my parents especially my dad were never strong church-goers let alone Christians.
Anyway fast forward time I stayed with this church and was baptised when I was 18.
There's quite a bit missed out and like I said it's a series of events but that's when I got to being baptised at least ...
Lost&Found
Member
Believe it or not I got saved through a book that I wrote. It was a fictional story about a small time drug dealer who experienced a supernaturual event involving an angel. The first chapter came to me while attending a church service. During that time I was not a church-goer. The only reason I went was because my relatives, which were Christians, kept inviting me. Finally, one Sunday I accepted their invitation. During the service this story kept going through my head. I did not know where it was coming from or why I was even thinking about it at that moment and that place. The next day I wrote it down and showed it to a cousin, a Christian. She liked the story and convinced me to expand on it. I took her advice and began writing. Throughout the year as I wrote I felt a sensation as if someone was telling me what to put down on paper. I found the hero being put into situations that I would not even have thought about. As the hero changed throughout the story I found myself thinking about my own life. Then I noticed a theme throughout the book. The theme was about choices. How the choices we make in our lives. From the big ones down to even the small ones. Every choice we make has consequences. Sometimes those consequences are obvious and sometimes they're suttle. And sometime we don't even get to know the consequences. By the time I finished writing the book I knew that it was God who was leading me on this journey and that I was ready to commit myself to him. I know that this testimony may sound like a self-promotion for my book that is why I will not reveal the title or where it could be found. If I did it would negate my whole testimony.
God Bless
God Bless
Last edited by a moderator:
I was born into a Christian family - protestants. I never knew any further denominations until a few months ago.
A long series of events began when I was about 6 years old. My grandparents had me memorize the ten commandments and I simply was rooted to them. Everyday, I would ask them if I had kept up all the commandments and they would smile and say yes. (They never told me exactly what adultery meant then.) This lasted only a few days then.
I grew up with strong moral teachings from my father and from what we read in the Bible. I would never take part in any wrong - I would never lie. I never valued anything materialistic. I would never mean anyone any harm. I was always inclined to give charity to all and I would never seek to tell anyone about it. Everyone around me commended me on my fear of God. I was considered trustworthy and even my elders treated me as a role model in obeying God. Anything we desired or needed, I would pray to God about it.
I was also blessed with many talents. I excelled in my academics and in every form of oration. I had, what you could say, a scientific mind. I fancied myself as a thinker - I would read socratic philosophy and feel right at home with it when others gave up. Whatever I took up, the Lord blessed. If I wanted to enter a competition in my school days, I would always emerge the winner. When praised for my achievements, I would always say that the Lord has been very gracious to me and that I deserved no credit whatsoever.
We were once reading Romans during our systematic Bible study at family prayer when I came across Romans 3:21-22 from the Good News Translation which goes as follows -
Rom 3:22 God puts people right through their faith in Jesus Christ. God does this to all who believe in Christ, because there is no difference at all:
I was glad that there was a passage that spoke pointedly about how we can be made right before God and it spoke about faith in Jesus and such faith, I had since childhood but was that it? Was my belief in the existence of God and acceptance of Jesus Christ as the Son of God sufficient? I was there taught that this faith should lead me to obey all God's righteous commandments - and I was satisfied, for this was what I was ardently doing.
When I was in college, year 2009, we(my friends and I) were, in a bizarre turn of events(which are a testimony in itself), selected among 6 teams in the world to participate in a Microsoft conducted competition in Cairo,Egypt. We ended up 2nd in the contest. We returned with our trophies and were congratulated from all quarters. I always attributed everything to God. But this time, I could not put my finger on it exactly, I was consumed by an incessant feeling of guilt. Where people praised me, I would smile, but I would be burdened with that strange sense of guilt again. I would rush to my family and narrate all that I had done that could in any way be guilt-worthy and all would laugh and say that my striving to be perfect is going beyond bounds. I would analyse every act of mine and I would always find righteous justification for it - and yet my guilt never left. This continued for about 4 months until Nov,2009.
I just felt like it then and I asked my mother to pick up a philosophy book from the Library. She said there was only one book on philosophy and she handed me C.S.Lewis' Mere Christianity. So what if it was Christian philosophy. I enjoyed all the philosophy until he began to narrate what was in the Bible. I kind of skimmed through this part because I knew all there was to know here. I was reading the chapter titled 'the great sin' which dealt with self-pride as the great sin from which developed all other sins. Somehow, I found myself denying the symptoms of self-pride laid out in that chapter instead of assuredly reading on. I shut the book - it was about noontime. That very night, at about 2am, I was pacing about, wondering if I had self-pride in me.
As I was recollecting from what I'd read, something to this effect struck me - the devil became the devil because of self-pride. I lingered on that for just a moment - what was the devil proud of? himself. What about himself was he proud of? his ability/wisdom etc. and that he need not heed the will of God - that he was beyond it. And could he not desire and will something for himself apart from the will of God. Was he not free enough to do that. I shuddered at the wickedness of such thoughts. Then my world began to crash.
I was trying to seek assurance that I would never do something like the devil when a sudden flash of thoughts from all my past life passed before me. In each event, I could find my will and desire being put forth but never did I seek the will of God. When I prayed, I always asked for what I willed but never sought to know what was God's will for me in that which I prayed. I never had treated God as God. It had always been my life, my way, and God was 'humbly' called upon to do as per what my will commanded - if something could be as outrageous as that. I was the god of my life but I always gave lip service to the glory of God.
And why that was so became clear in that instant. I was so filled with self-pride that I was blind to its existence. I always took credit for all my achievements and works of righteousness, not openly but in my heart. I would always turn down others' praises because I valued their praises as less than what I praised myself with. I reveled in being unique and better than another. I endeared to be 'humble' because I enjoyed the internal pride of being able to resist the temptation of outward pride.
I was self-conceited in my righteousness. All my works lay bare before me - and not one was without the stench of my own will and self-righteousness. I searched for just one act that was uncorrupted. I found none. Even my acts of charity were corrupted with self-pride. I had always understood that God, seeing our most righteous acts as filthy rags was to teach us how much more righteous He is and to teach us humility. But now I saw that what I thought to be my most righteous act, was indeed abhorring to God. All along, I had committed the sin of the devil - could I get any worse. I was indeed the chief of sinners - as to the depth to which I had sunk.
Then I felt the presence of God before me. I saw no vision or light but I had a strong sense of absolute purity before me. I felt reviled that one so corrupt as I should be permitted to stay before this pure Being (Luke 5:8). My heart sank. With what could I approach this purity. I felt naked before Him. I knew I was condemned for I condemned myself with what I had tried to do. All the righteousness that I sought to gain with my good conduct was shown to be sin in an instant. I wept at my plight, at all the vanity in all I did when the end was to be this. Just as I was about to lose all hope and resign myself unto condemnation, I saw the cross.
In that instant, everything became clear to me. Christ already knew I would be found like this. His death was on account of me. I wasn't one in the crowd that wept for Him - I was the one who wanted Him crucified. And inspite of that, here He was, offering me the promise of salvation because of what He had done on the cross. My heart broke. How could God even think of saving a wretch like me after all that I had done. In this I saw true love and this love was unbearable. I could not deserve this. I did not deserve this. And yet, with no words spoken, He said I was pardoned.
I couldn't believe I was being granted another chance to live. I who was dead because of my own works of sin, am being allowed to live. I could not come to terms with it. As I was weeping uncontrollably, a sudden fear gripped me. I had no hope in keeping true righteousness in the future. If this was all I could do - to act against God constantly all my life, then how could I face tomorrow. How could I face up to the fact that I would again be acting according to what was in my nature all this while, and again sin - (because that's what I've been doing all my life) - and nullify what Christ has done for me that moment.
I heard a voice within me saying,"Fear not, for I am with you." This promise filled me with such courage that knew no bounds. I fell down on my face and said I never again wanted anything to do with deciding in my life. If this is where my will and works got me, then I will have nothing to do with it. I pleaded with God to command my life as He wanted. To keep me from sinning for His own sake - that I was weak in keeping up righteousness and if expected to do so, that I myself expected me to fail. It was then that I understood Romans 3:22 - I was here believing in Christ's ability to get me through all the way and if not - if my will or works were expected - I might as well die there.
But immediately doubt crept up on whether I was hallucinating and imagining voices because of the late hour and the state I was in. The voice reassured me that He was God indeed and I slept with peace in my heart. The entire duration of this episode was less than 10 mins. I awoke next day wishing desperately that God would not have stopped speaking and when I said good morning, I heard God call me by name and reply.
A long series of events began when I was about 6 years old. My grandparents had me memorize the ten commandments and I simply was rooted to them. Everyday, I would ask them if I had kept up all the commandments and they would smile and say yes. (They never told me exactly what adultery meant then.) This lasted only a few days then.
I grew up with strong moral teachings from my father and from what we read in the Bible. I would never take part in any wrong - I would never lie. I never valued anything materialistic. I would never mean anyone any harm. I was always inclined to give charity to all and I would never seek to tell anyone about it. Everyone around me commended me on my fear of God. I was considered trustworthy and even my elders treated me as a role model in obeying God. Anything we desired or needed, I would pray to God about it.
I was also blessed with many talents. I excelled in my academics and in every form of oration. I had, what you could say, a scientific mind. I fancied myself as a thinker - I would read socratic philosophy and feel right at home with it when others gave up. Whatever I took up, the Lord blessed. If I wanted to enter a competition in my school days, I would always emerge the winner. When praised for my achievements, I would always say that the Lord has been very gracious to me and that I deserved no credit whatsoever.
We were once reading Romans during our systematic Bible study at family prayer when I came across Romans 3:21-22 from the Good News Translation which goes as follows -
Rom 3:22 God puts people right through their faith in Jesus Christ. God does this to all who believe in Christ, because there is no difference at all:
I was glad that there was a passage that spoke pointedly about how we can be made right before God and it spoke about faith in Jesus and such faith, I had since childhood but was that it? Was my belief in the existence of God and acceptance of Jesus Christ as the Son of God sufficient? I was there taught that this faith should lead me to obey all God's righteous commandments - and I was satisfied, for this was what I was ardently doing.
When I was in college, year 2009, we(my friends and I) were, in a bizarre turn of events(which are a testimony in itself), selected among 6 teams in the world to participate in a Microsoft conducted competition in Cairo,Egypt. We ended up 2nd in the contest. We returned with our trophies and were congratulated from all quarters. I always attributed everything to God. But this time, I could not put my finger on it exactly, I was consumed by an incessant feeling of guilt. Where people praised me, I would smile, but I would be burdened with that strange sense of guilt again. I would rush to my family and narrate all that I had done that could in any way be guilt-worthy and all would laugh and say that my striving to be perfect is going beyond bounds. I would analyse every act of mine and I would always find righteous justification for it - and yet my guilt never left. This continued for about 4 months until Nov,2009.
I just felt like it then and I asked my mother to pick up a philosophy book from the Library. She said there was only one book on philosophy and she handed me C.S.Lewis' Mere Christianity. So what if it was Christian philosophy. I enjoyed all the philosophy until he began to narrate what was in the Bible. I kind of skimmed through this part because I knew all there was to know here. I was reading the chapter titled 'the great sin' which dealt with self-pride as the great sin from which developed all other sins. Somehow, I found myself denying the symptoms of self-pride laid out in that chapter instead of assuredly reading on. I shut the book - it was about noontime. That very night, at about 2am, I was pacing about, wondering if I had self-pride in me.
As I was recollecting from what I'd read, something to this effect struck me - the devil became the devil because of self-pride. I lingered on that for just a moment - what was the devil proud of? himself. What about himself was he proud of? his ability/wisdom etc. and that he need not heed the will of God - that he was beyond it. And could he not desire and will something for himself apart from the will of God. Was he not free enough to do that. I shuddered at the wickedness of such thoughts. Then my world began to crash.
I was trying to seek assurance that I would never do something like the devil when a sudden flash of thoughts from all my past life passed before me. In each event, I could find my will and desire being put forth but never did I seek the will of God. When I prayed, I always asked for what I willed but never sought to know what was God's will for me in that which I prayed. I never had treated God as God. It had always been my life, my way, and God was 'humbly' called upon to do as per what my will commanded - if something could be as outrageous as that. I was the god of my life but I always gave lip service to the glory of God.
And why that was so became clear in that instant. I was so filled with self-pride that I was blind to its existence. I always took credit for all my achievements and works of righteousness, not openly but in my heart. I would always turn down others' praises because I valued their praises as less than what I praised myself with. I reveled in being unique and better than another. I endeared to be 'humble' because I enjoyed the internal pride of being able to resist the temptation of outward pride.
I was self-conceited in my righteousness. All my works lay bare before me - and not one was without the stench of my own will and self-righteousness. I searched for just one act that was uncorrupted. I found none. Even my acts of charity were corrupted with self-pride. I had always understood that God, seeing our most righteous acts as filthy rags was to teach us how much more righteous He is and to teach us humility. But now I saw that what I thought to be my most righteous act, was indeed abhorring to God. All along, I had committed the sin of the devil - could I get any worse. I was indeed the chief of sinners - as to the depth to which I had sunk.
Then I felt the presence of God before me. I saw no vision or light but I had a strong sense of absolute purity before me. I felt reviled that one so corrupt as I should be permitted to stay before this pure Being (Luke 5:8). My heart sank. With what could I approach this purity. I felt naked before Him. I knew I was condemned for I condemned myself with what I had tried to do. All the righteousness that I sought to gain with my good conduct was shown to be sin in an instant. I wept at my plight, at all the vanity in all I did when the end was to be this. Just as I was about to lose all hope and resign myself unto condemnation, I saw the cross.
In that instant, everything became clear to me. Christ already knew I would be found like this. His death was on account of me. I wasn't one in the crowd that wept for Him - I was the one who wanted Him crucified. And inspite of that, here He was, offering me the promise of salvation because of what He had done on the cross. My heart broke. How could God even think of saving a wretch like me after all that I had done. In this I saw true love and this love was unbearable. I could not deserve this. I did not deserve this. And yet, with no words spoken, He said I was pardoned.
I couldn't believe I was being granted another chance to live. I who was dead because of my own works of sin, am being allowed to live. I could not come to terms with it. As I was weeping uncontrollably, a sudden fear gripped me. I had no hope in keeping true righteousness in the future. If this was all I could do - to act against God constantly all my life, then how could I face tomorrow. How could I face up to the fact that I would again be acting according to what was in my nature all this while, and again sin - (because that's what I've been doing all my life) - and nullify what Christ has done for me that moment.
I heard a voice within me saying,"Fear not, for I am with you." This promise filled me with such courage that knew no bounds. I fell down on my face and said I never again wanted anything to do with deciding in my life. If this is where my will and works got me, then I will have nothing to do with it. I pleaded with God to command my life as He wanted. To keep me from sinning for His own sake - that I was weak in keeping up righteousness and if expected to do so, that I myself expected me to fail. It was then that I understood Romans 3:22 - I was here believing in Christ's ability to get me through all the way and if not - if my will or works were expected - I might as well die there.
But immediately doubt crept up on whether I was hallucinating and imagining voices because of the late hour and the state I was in. The voice reassured me that He was God indeed and I slept with peace in my heart. The entire duration of this episode was less than 10 mins. I awoke next day wishing desperately that God would not have stopped speaking and when I said good morning, I heard God call me by name and reply.
That is amazing, a "youtube Christian"! Wow! Actually I was surprised just the other day to get a PM from a youtubie asking me for my testimony. Youtube should not be discounted with its outreach. Another thing I have noticed on YT is sometimes people who make videos say they have made some of their best friends through YT viewers. There`s a lot of venom on YT, but there is also something about it that allows people to connect on a personal level as well.
AKJVReader
Member
When i was thirteen years old. (13 is a number for love in the KJV Bible)
I had been given a Good News Bible by my grandmother as a gift and i had a few classes of Bible Scripture at school which was about the names of characters in the Bible, really basic but nothing to make me saved or really interested. One day i decided that i would read the Good News Bible out of interest. I read it and some things seemed alright and other things i could not understand and this went on for 3 months. Overall it was supposed to be God's Word so if i didn't understand it, God would understand that i thought. I also looked at the people at my school, did anyone of them read the Bible or pray or talk about God, it seemed to me that no one did, the teachers didn't talk about God, i was the only one there that had read the Bible i thought.
One day at school i was playing a ball game with my friends and then someone grabbed the ball and threw it through a open window of a classroom. I went to find it with my friends, we went up the stairs and in a classroom were this man and lady sitting there together, i went to the door and they came out and invited us in, we went in not sure what they were going to say to us. They told me they were Christians and said did i know about Jesus, i said i did as i had been reading bits of the Bible for three months. They said to me did we want to pray and we said yes, they prayed the prayer of salvation for my friends and then they then prayed for me, i said i was sorry for my sins and i accepted Jesus into my life, as they were talking something came upon me, i suddenly felt really peaceful and joyful, it came fully over me. It was the Holy Spirit.
"[FONT=arial,helvatica]For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16).
[/FONT]So then it was the end of the lunch break and i had the peace and joy for about two hours after that.
I knew that i had changed and it was my best moment at school.
Then i had thoughts, what if i went to a Christian school, would i learn the Bible and have it explained to me, i told my parents that i would like to go to a Christian school and so one day Mum took me to an interview with a headmaster at a local Christian school. We talked and the headmaster said the school wasn't heaven but it was a great school, so i was then taken to a guide who showed me around the school and as i was walking around the place, i remembered that i had been there, yes, in a vision! Amazing, i knew God wanted me to go this school and so i then signed up to go to it. I had some more visions about school buildings after this as well but then i had no more, i believe the dreams were from God because he wanted me to know He was still involved in this world.
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"And it shall come to pass in the last days, saith God, I will pour out of my Spirit upon all flesh: and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams:" (Acts 2:17)[/FONT]
It was after this time that I started to read the NIV alot. The Good News was a Bible for kids and since i was getting mature a NIV was the right choice as it was popular too. For a brief time i went to a Church with my family after i encouraged them to go. So i read the NIV for alot of years, i did not know that the KJV even existed nor was i interested in reading another translation of the Bible.
After school i went to live in a place a long way from where i grew up. I went to the local Church there and i spent alot of my time playing video games. I was hooked on video games like someone who needs nicotine, and i saw no problem with it according to the Bible. I thought my addiction was good as i really enjoyed playing games, God made me to like games i thought and it was like an escape from the world, so this addiction used up alot of my time, when i should have been working or witnessing i couldn't break the addiction, playing video games was a part of me. I found some young friends who were alot younger than me and they would play games with me on the weekends. I didn't use the Internet that much, but one day i was surfing the Internet and i came across sermonaudio.com from a web search on something related, i went there and was amazed at the number of preachers there. I typed something random into the search box and Dr Scott Johnson came up aside other names. I thought that i would click his name, and his sermons came up, i thought that i would download some to listen to at home, so i saved them to my USB. I liked the sermons that i heard, he seemed to talk well and i was learning new stuff. I then heard his sermons about the King James Bible and it convinced me that the King James Bible was right!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"The words of the LORD are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times. [/FONT][FONT=arial,helvatica]Thou shalt keep them, O LORD, thou shalt preserve them from this generation for ever." (Psalm 12:6-7)[/FONT]
I realized the errors in my beloved NIV and i then couldn't read it anymore, i brought a Authorized King James Bible and now have been reading everyday since. I have lost my desire to play video games, the Holy Spirit changed me so that i dont even want to play for 2 minutes! I have matured as well. I have met some knowledgeable Christians at this forum and i can learn from them, i listen to Pastor Mike Hoggard and Bryan Delinger too. I love to hear good sermons. The Authorized King James Bible is a very valuable gem, i do alot of reading too, i'm reading a book about Christian Apologetics at the moment. Life is full of learning everyday. Just like it says in Proverbs, one should get knowledge!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge." (Proverbs 18:15)[/FONT]
That's my testimony, Praise God for His love, kindness and mercy!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." (John 14:6)[/FONT]
I had been given a Good News Bible by my grandmother as a gift and i had a few classes of Bible Scripture at school which was about the names of characters in the Bible, really basic but nothing to make me saved or really interested. One day i decided that i would read the Good News Bible out of interest. I read it and some things seemed alright and other things i could not understand and this went on for 3 months. Overall it was supposed to be God's Word so if i didn't understand it, God would understand that i thought. I also looked at the people at my school, did anyone of them read the Bible or pray or talk about God, it seemed to me that no one did, the teachers didn't talk about God, i was the only one there that had read the Bible i thought.
One day at school i was playing a ball game with my friends and then someone grabbed the ball and threw it through a open window of a classroom. I went to find it with my friends, we went up the stairs and in a classroom were this man and lady sitting there together, i went to the door and they came out and invited us in, we went in not sure what they were going to say to us. They told me they were Christians and said did i know about Jesus, i said i did as i had been reading bits of the Bible for three months. They said to me did we want to pray and we said yes, they prayed the prayer of salvation for my friends and then they then prayed for me, i said i was sorry for my sins and i accepted Jesus into my life, as they were talking something came upon me, i suddenly felt really peaceful and joyful, it came fully over me. It was the Holy Spirit.
"[FONT=arial,helvatica]For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16).
[/FONT]So then it was the end of the lunch break and i had the peace and joy for about two hours after that.
I knew that i had changed and it was my best moment at school.
Then i had thoughts, what if i went to a Christian school, would i learn the Bible and have it explained to me, i told my parents that i would like to go to a Christian school and so one day Mum took me to an interview with a headmaster at a local Christian school. We talked and the headmaster said the school wasn't heaven but it was a great school, so i was then taken to a guide who showed me around the school and as i was walking around the place, i remembered that i had been there, yes, in a vision! Amazing, i knew God wanted me to go this school and so i then signed up to go to it. I had some more visions about school buildings after this as well but then i had no more, i believe the dreams were from God because he wanted me to know He was still involved in this world.
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"And it shall come to pass in the last days, saith God, I will pour out of my Spirit upon all flesh: and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams:" (Acts 2:17)[/FONT]
It was after this time that I started to read the NIV alot. The Good News was a Bible for kids and since i was getting mature a NIV was the right choice as it was popular too. For a brief time i went to a Church with my family after i encouraged them to go. So i read the NIV for alot of years, i did not know that the KJV even existed nor was i interested in reading another translation of the Bible.
After school i went to live in a place a long way from where i grew up. I went to the local Church there and i spent alot of my time playing video games. I was hooked on video games like someone who needs nicotine, and i saw no problem with it according to the Bible. I thought my addiction was good as i really enjoyed playing games, God made me to like games i thought and it was like an escape from the world, so this addiction used up alot of my time, when i should have been working or witnessing i couldn't break the addiction, playing video games was a part of me. I found some young friends who were alot younger than me and they would play games with me on the weekends. I didn't use the Internet that much, but one day i was surfing the Internet and i came across sermonaudio.com from a web search on something related, i went there and was amazed at the number of preachers there. I typed something random into the search box and Dr Scott Johnson came up aside other names. I thought that i would click his name, and his sermons came up, i thought that i would download some to listen to at home, so i saved them to my USB. I liked the sermons that i heard, he seemed to talk well and i was learning new stuff. I then heard his sermons about the King James Bible and it convinced me that the King James Bible was right!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"The words of the LORD are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times. [/FONT][FONT=arial,helvatica]Thou shalt keep them, O LORD, thou shalt preserve them from this generation for ever." (Psalm 12:6-7)[/FONT]
I realized the errors in my beloved NIV and i then couldn't read it anymore, i brought a Authorized King James Bible and now have been reading everyday since. I have lost my desire to play video games, the Holy Spirit changed me so that i dont even want to play for 2 minutes! I have matured as well. I have met some knowledgeable Christians at this forum and i can learn from them, i listen to Pastor Mike Hoggard and Bryan Delinger too. I love to hear good sermons. The Authorized King James Bible is a very valuable gem, i do alot of reading too, i'm reading a book about Christian Apologetics at the moment. Life is full of learning everyday. Just like it says in Proverbs, one should get knowledge!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge." (Proverbs 18:15)[/FONT]
That's my testimony, Praise God for His love, kindness and mercy!
[FONT=arial,helvatica]"Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me." (John 14:6)[/FONT]
considering the results of the poll. my way in rescue or fullfillance in my life, has it roats when i was 13/14 years of age. end then when i was 19 years after lots(bad') i got into the world of christ and egyupt and so so so.
it is actually to be honest my mental illness that brought me closer to the lord,
savind or being saved i find hard to agree on since i am in the underestimation that when you think you have to be saved, you're of track..
it is actually to be honest my mental illness that brought me closer to the lord,
savind or being saved i find hard to agree on since i am in the underestimation that when you think you have to be saved, you're of track..
I was five years old at the time, so I don't remember all that well. I think it was probably a combination of my mother's influence and the church she had us attending.
But to be honest, I don't think I would have stayed a Christian without some remarkable things having happened in the past few years.
When I got onto the internet eventually I joined a forum and began debating with others in the debate section. I wanted to share my faith, so I especially joined in on debates that had to do with Christianity. And although I knew my Bible fairly well, I wasn't very knowledgeable. Everyone else seemingly knowing more than me, I began to question God.
It bugged me for several days. I had never actually done much to further my relationship with God, so I didn't have this amazing personal testimony to fall back on. So I was beginning to think that maybe after all, my faith had been in vain and there was no point in it.
One night when reading my Bible, I suddenly felt this presence, and it spoke to me in it's own way. I just knew this was God. He told me that despite all of my questions, I was on the right path and not to worry. My doubts melted away and I just felt this incredible feeling of joy.
This experience changed my life. Over time my relationship with God grew and grew. It was simply amazing.
Later on down the road, things happened. Things that tried my faith and made me want to give up on being a Christian, despite knowing it was the truth. At one point, for the first time in my life, I was even angry at God.
Suffice to say, I experienced yet another side of God during those times. I learned that it's true what they say: God is faithful and always provides us with exactly what we need.
I also learned what amazing friends God has given me.
These experiences may be the only reason I'm still a Christian.
But to be honest, I don't think I would have stayed a Christian without some remarkable things having happened in the past few years.
When I got onto the internet eventually I joined a forum and began debating with others in the debate section. I wanted to share my faith, so I especially joined in on debates that had to do with Christianity. And although I knew my Bible fairly well, I wasn't very knowledgeable. Everyone else seemingly knowing more than me, I began to question God.
It bugged me for several days. I had never actually done much to further my relationship with God, so I didn't have this amazing personal testimony to fall back on. So I was beginning to think that maybe after all, my faith had been in vain and there was no point in it.
One night when reading my Bible, I suddenly felt this presence, and it spoke to me in it's own way. I just knew this was God. He told me that despite all of my questions, I was on the right path and not to worry. My doubts melted away and I just felt this incredible feeling of joy.
This experience changed my life. Over time my relationship with God grew and grew. It was simply amazing.
Later on down the road, things happened. Things that tried my faith and made me want to give up on being a Christian, despite knowing it was the truth. At one point, for the first time in my life, I was even angry at God.
Suffice to say, I experienced yet another side of God during those times. I learned that it's true what they say: God is faithful and always provides us with exactly what we need.
I also learned what amazing friends God has given me.
These experiences may be the only reason I'm still a Christian.
Last edited by a moderator:
God's_gift
Member
Hi questdriven, again welcome to CF.net
so glad you joined us here. :yes Would you mine if I ask this. Have you personally recieved Jesus Christ as your personal Lord and Saviour already?
Thank you.
I definitely have. I used to wonder about whether I was really saved or not, but experiences showed me those doubts were unfounded.
I apologize if I went off-topic for this thread with the edits in my last post.
I definitely have. I used to wonder about whether I was really saved or not, but experiences showed me those doubts were unfounded.
I apologize if I went off-topic for this thread with the edits in my last post.
God's_gift
Member
Jesusfreak97
Member
Camp is what brought me to Christ. Wonderful Camp Timber-Lee! That place will always be special to me. I rember looking at all the counselors and I knew that they had something that I didn't and I wanted it. Turns out I got it. My first chapel thingy there I rember walking up to the bulding and I heard screaming and I thought that an animal from the science center had made it's way all accross camp in there (I was just as blond then as I am now) but we went in any way. There was no animal in there but they were worshiping and having FUN doing. But it's church and you're not supposed to have fun in church. ;) well apparently you could and I did and I learned that God wasn't far away waaaaaay above us sitting in a big chair just looking at us and keeping track of our sins. He was RIGHT THERE WITH ME. And as the pastor explained it that he wanted a relationship with me and I thought that was SO cool. And I still think it's cool.
SemperFidelis07
Member
I grew up in a Christian household. My parents raised me and my sisters to love the Lord. Never once did I question it. Not even when I was a teenager. My wartime experiences brought me closer to Jesus through a fellow Marine.