Maximum allowed age difference

[Classik]

My mom and stepdad were more than 15 years apart in age.

That was a long time ago???:D

 

[evenifigoalone]

That was a long time ago???:D

Eleven years ago.

 

[farouk]

The issue is maturity, rather than 'counting beans'.

 

[Classik]

Eleven years ago.

close to the modern day stuff;)

 

[Classik]

The issue is maturity, rather than 'counting beans'.

yeah yep ya yeah yes ye! But it's also interesting when couples keep making funny mistakes and keep correcting them.:D

 

[Classik]

Age might be very necessary (considering biological changes in women).

Why?

Deborah13:

Yes, I wondered why, also?

Obviously there is a link to the possibility of having children, but once the woman is a certain age and is unlikely to have children any more, yet
there is obviously no bar on her getting married, if she's single.

Yes, and I was thinking more on the idea in the OP as the earliest age that is advisable. but Clasik was probably considering the idea of being to late to have children.

That's part of it. Particularly however, I believe at 50 couples should be resting. The children have a role to play here...

 

[Deborah13]

That's part of it. Particularly however, I believe at 50 couples should be resting. The children have a role to play here...

I agree about the resting. But especially that it is time for the next generation to be established for many reasons.

AND, I love being Grandma.

 

[Classik]

I agree about the resting. But especially that it is time for the next generation to be established for many reasons.

AND, I love being Grandma.

I'm happy for you:D

 

[jasoncran]

I think the difference age is more important when you're you, in your teens or 20s, than it is later in life, for instance when you're in your 50s. The difference between a 19 year old and a 25 year old can be enormous, whereas the difference between a 45 year old anbd a 55 year old may not even be noticeable.

I think the right age to marry is determined by the individual, but I was 28 and my wife 26 when we married. It was a good time, we both had finished college, and I had spent my time in the navy. We were both mature and ready for a family.

i was 27 and my wife 42. man the things i didnt know. Im 40 now

 

[bhayes]

There is a rule out there I heard for young folks who are having this issue. What you do is divide your age by 2 and then add 7. That is what is "socially" acceptable for young people. Not sure if it applies to older folks however!

 

[tim-from-pa]

As to the age difference, I always used the guideline that I wouldn't date anyone more than seven years younger than I am. I'm a Vietnam veteran, and I don't believe anyone more than seven years younger than I am can understand my life perspective. That difference would vary from person to person, but I think it is important to consider life perspectives, the eras of history in which each of us has grown up, our social outlook and of course our faith background.

As for early marriage, I'm not a fan. We're finding that full maturity cognitively-emotively does not occur until nearly age 30 in men, 26 or 27 in women. Obviously some people are more mature at 22 than others, or even at age 19. But the overall truth is, maturity comes in the mid to late 20s, and no one should subject another person to their level of immaturity by marrying too soon.

I agree with you here. I think one facet of this question is not so much the individuals, or even their "maturity", etc etc but rather the generation they grew up in. I took a liking to the baby boomer generation considering I am at the tail end of it. My brother must be closer to your age (62) since he was in the Vietnam era, and I jokingly refer to myself as the "hippy's kid brother" (of course he was not a hippy, just the generation) and I was always around older friends of his in that generation. In my dating years, this is why I gravitated to women in their 30's while I was yet in my 20's. My wife's the youngest I ever dated, and although she graduated only one year ahead of me, she's at least in my generation with older siblings like I had.

But in my case, if I did not have my wife and dated just a few years younger, even at my ripe ol' age of 53, I'd be with generation x which I do not take a great liking for (their social norms) considering they grew up in totally different circumstances. As a matter of fact, an x'er in their early 40's or younger probably don't even remember a time that they did not have a computer and/or electronic toy in their house. In my case, the most advanced thing we had was black-and-white TV, and our perspectives and expectations on life are totally different.

The exception I may make is an x'er that had older siblings, say in the boomer generation, but if they are the eldest of the siblings then definitely not.

 

[Carolyn]

Compatibility has more to do with it all. 20 years difference my mean one wants a very active life style but the other one can't keep up.
As to early age òf marriage. I was mature and 18, and was way too young. I needed to know how to be on my òwn, first. And my husband should have been established in a career of some sort first. Our first 4 years were extremely tough and we did not have to contend with children. I always told our boys to wait till they were 24 to consider getting married.

Today they wait till they are 28 or 30 but live together in fornication for 5 or more years.
By the way, the divorse rate is also very high now.

 

[farouk]

I have said this before. Plus, perspective and all that TND was speaking of is important. While I do agree that maturity and ones walk with God can make things work, I think that the less age difference there is, the better, and the easier it will be for both to be at the same stage of life at the same time. If the man's turning 50, and the woman is 35...they may have different drives at that point that may bring about discourse. I got married when I was 23 and she was 18. When she became pregnant, I wasn't shocked or scared. I remember thinking oh well I guess this is where I am in life, about to have a family now. I immediately wanted to marry her and make an "honest" woman of her. I stuck beside her and saw both of my children born. An experience I highly recommend and never want to repeat, lol.

Edward:

By 'discourse', do you mean, 'discord'?

It's understandable if the woman has not had children, at 35 she is likely to want it to happen fairly soon.

I don't, however, see any 'rule' about ages.

 

[Sparkey]

Here's a different take on the subject from the Free Legal Advice site, AVVO.com
Home > Research Legal Advice > Juvenile > Legal Age difference

Legal Age difference
Asked about 5 years ago - Yakima, WA
Criminal Defense Juveniles

I am 18 and my boyfriend is 15 going to be 16 in 4 months. I need to know the legal age difference to see if we can be together sexually.

A couple attorneys have responded, one from WA state and another response from a Los Angeles Criminal Defense Attorney.

I know this thread is about "dating" and not sex but I thought we might take a quick look at some of the legal issues in the world around us. Oh, this is about 5 years old and laws change. Don't rely on it, rather eschew evil and abstain from sin.

~Sparrow

 

[farouk]

I hasten to add that I wasn't talking about the age of consent, or unmarried couples.

 

[farouk]

I did mean discord, that was a typo. I don't know of any rules about age either, I was giving personal opinion.

Edward:

Okay, ty .

God bless you guys; so a little one came along pretty soon, then. I guess your point was that for a woman that is already well into her 30s and has not had any kids yet, marrying an older guy could conceivably involve some impatience on her part.

Blessings.