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Missinterpreting the words of Paul of the Apostle on Divorce matters

Classik

Classik

Member
This is the kind of thread majority of people would avoid or ignore.


Goodness! Where did Paul say you must divorce an adulterous wife or husband? I doubt if he actually meant 'MUST divorce', I believe he meant 'you MAY divorce'.

And how about forgiving the adulterous wife/husband?

Funny thing is, some don't even divorce on the issue of infidelity and adultery. Some even do on other petty issues, perhaps issues of dislikes nature, bordeom with spouse, violence and abuse, monitary challenges etc.

Is it right at all to divorce on such issues other than that of adultery?

Perhaps some christians divorce because they have refused to let GOD take control or have refused to give up contending with each other.


:dunno :shrug :confused
 
Classik said:
This is the kind of thread majority of people would avoid or ignore.


Goodness! Where did Paul say you must divorce an adulterous wife or husband? I doubt if he actually meant 'MUST divorce', I believe he meant 'you MAY divorce'.

And how about forgiving the adulterous wife/husband?

Funny thing is, some don't even divorce on the issue of infidelity and adultery. Some even do on other petty issues, perhaps issues of dislikes nature, bordeom with spouse, violence and abuse, monitary challenges etc.

Is it right at all to divorce on such issues other than that of adultery?

Perhaps some christians divorce because they have refused to let GOD take control or have refused to give up contending with each other.


:dunno :shrug :confused
Click to expand...

Which passage are you referring to?
 
Classik,

Are you referring to verse 15?

10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.

(1 Corinthians 7)

​

:)
 
Thank you for providing a chapter. Yes: I was talking about all those verses on adultery.

I only frown at the thought that any woman/man who commits adultery must be divorced.
 
Classik said:
Thank you for providing a chapter. Yes: I was talking about all those verses on adultery.

I only frown at the thought that any woman/man who commits adultery must be divorced.
Click to expand...

Take a closer look at verse 15. Does Paul say a spouse must, or may end a marriage with a partner?
 
IMO, this is the real problem with what Paul said:

"A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband." (1 Corinthians 7:10 NIV)

Some think he is giving the option to women for leaving a marriage as long as she stays unmarried, and so they justify divorce that way.

The problem with this is, when you leave a marriage, except for the case of marital infidelity, you cause the other person to commit adultery.

"32 but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the reason of unchastity, makes her commit adultery" (Matthew 5:32 NASB)
 
Jethro Bodine said:
Classik said:
And how about forgiving the adulterous wife/husband?
Click to expand...
ONLY if that person is 100% repentant and sorry for what they did and takes full responsibility for what they did.

That's the only way it will not come up later as a sore spot between them.
Click to expand...

thanks, Jethro.

This is similar to the case where one struggles with other sin.

How about people like Hezekiah and the woman she married? This may seem a different situation tho...however he didnt quit going after her.
 
I've had to deal with this personally after a wife committed adultery repeatedly and unrepentantly. (She freely admitted to the adultery, so this wasn't just suspicion on my part.) Over several years of studying this subject, I found NO scripture commanding that I must divorce her, only scripture (such as already cited above) giving me that option. But I chose the option to forgive, or at least to wait and be ready to forgive when she repented. The repentance never came and she ended up divorcing me. Still, I refused to agree to the divorce in any way and refused to put my signature on any paperwork regarding it. In my mind, my marriage was a vow between us and God, and I didn't consider God to be subject to a paper issued by my state government to override His will or authority. I still considered myself married to her in God's eyes until I exercised my "option" of divorcing her due to her adultery and I continued to conduct myself as a married man.

Even though she had moved out of our house and continued in her adultery, I was determined to give God every opportunity to work on my wife's heart and continually prayed for this. I even continued long past the point where my emotions said I'd had enough and I should walk away. Jesus didn't walk away from me when I repeated sins, so I didn't want to walk away from her as long as I thought there was a chance she would repent. But she eventually had a child with her "boyfriend" and moved in with him. A couple years after that happened, one day I could feel the Holy Spirit was telling me it was enough, and it was time to divorce her. (Divorce her in God's eyes at least. Our legal divorce she filed had long ago been finalized.) So I simply told God that if it was His will at that point I would exercise my option.

I guess my point is that in what I went through, I never saw any command to divorce. But I also recognized God had given me that option when I chose to take it. There are many things in which God gives us choices, and this is one of them in my opinion.
 
Obadiah said:
I've had to deal with this personally after a wife committed adultery repeatedly and unrepentantly. (She freely admitted to the adultery, so this wasn't just suspicion on my part.) Over several years of studying this subject, I found NO scripture commanding that I must divorce her, only scripture (such as already cited above) giving me that option. But I chose the option to forgive, or at least to wait and be ready to forgive when she repented. The repentance never came and she ended up divorcing me. Still, I refused to agree to the divorce in any way and refused to put my signature on any paperwork regarding it. In my mind, my marriage was a vow between us and God, and I didn't consider God to be subject to a paper issued by my state government to override His will or authority. I still considered myself married to her in God's eyes until I exercised my "option" of divorcing her due to her adultery and I continued to conduct myself as a married man. Even though she had moved out of our house and continued in her adultery, I was determined to give God every opportunity to work on my wife's heart and continually prayed for this. I even continued long past the point where my emotions said I'd had enough and I should walk away. Jesus didn't walk away from me when I repeated sins, so I didn't want to walk away from her as long as I thought there was a chance she would repent. But she eventually had a child with her "boyfriend" and moved in with him. A couple years after that happened, one day I could feel the Holy Spirit was telling me it was enough, and it was time to divorce her. (Divorce her in God's eyes at least. Our legal divorce she filed had long ago been finalized.) So I simply told God that if it was His will at that point I would exercise my option. I guess my point is that in what I went through, I never saw any command to divorce. But I also recognized God had given me that option when I chose to take it. There are many things in which God gives us choices, and this is one of them in my opinion.
Click to expand...

The grace you have been given speaks volumes. My wife showed me the same earlier on in our marriage. And thanks @Jethro Bodine for using what you have been given to reveal the spirit of the law yet again.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Classik said:
This is the kind of thread majority of people would avoid or ignore.


Goodness! Where did Paul say you must divorce an adulterous wife or husband? I doubt if he actually meant 'MUST divorce', I believe he meant 'you MAY divorce'.

And how about forgiving the adulterous wife/husband?

Funny thing is, some don't even divorce on the issue of infidelity and adultery. Some even do on other petty issues, perhaps issues of dislikes nature, bordeom with spouse, violence and abuse, monitary challenges etc.

Is it right at all to divorce on such issues other than that of adultery?

Perhaps some christians divorce because they have refused to let GOD take control or have refused to give up contending with each other.


:dunno :shrug :confused
Click to expand...

Could you share some of Paul's words on the subject?


JLB
 
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