Mom's not saved before she's gone

[Dwarfs8]

3 months ago my mom has passed away in her sedation due to lung cancer... talking about it now makes me feel sad again..

church mates, pastors have all visited her before and during her sedation, trying to show their concern... A reverend tried to talk to her regarding gospel, but she seems indifferent. While she was in the hospital, i asked her if she wanted me to pray for her and she answered "anything". So i prayed for her almost everyday... yet.. at the end of it before her sedation, i asked her if she's willing to believe lord jesus, i can pray for her, she wld only nd to pray/believe in her heart, she said "No". Seriously, i'm at my wits end cos knowing there isn't much time left, so i told her if she believes, she can be in heaven with Jesus, she said "she doesn't want to".

A day or so later, her breathing was too difficult and she wanted to suicide by taking out her oxygen mask. We all stopped her and we siblings tried to take shift looking after her in hospital. So the docs decided to sedate her so as to take away her pain. Sedating her is like literally letting her "die" earlier. When i stepped into the hospital and saw her sedated on her bed, i think my heart bleeded. My tears kept flowing, cos i know very well this was it and there's nothing more i can say to her... We tried to stay with her till 4am that morning, my pastor came and preached to her in her sedation, we kept praying for her. My siblings came but none of us can take it anymore, so we went home to sleep... 9.30am she passed on...

seriously, 3 months after what has happened, it's all too vivid in my mind still. Whenever i passed by her house, i'll tear up... I miss her sooo much, my heart hurts. The thing that she didn't receive Christ, not knowing where is she now, hurts me even more...

the doc said that there are lots of instances where sedation patients can hear us out there, but it's only a chance, not a guarantee...

i blame myself too, i'm probably haven't done enough to lead her to Christ...

 

[Lewis]

I feel your pain my mom is still living but she is a Hebrew and she is one of the old order Hebrews who don't believe in the New Testament. And I think about her and my other family members who are the old order Hebrews who don't believe that Yashua = Jesus is the Messiah. Her mother my grand mom died that way, and even though we still had her funeral in a church officiated by a pastor, what good did that do ? Nothing. Because my grand mom would not condone the New Testament I don't care what you told her she was a strict Pharisee type Hebrew. It is a hurting thing to know that they don't get to live with the Lord for ever, but there is nothing that we can do about it.

 

[Dwarfs8]

My mom is a v devoted Taoist and a traditional women who is very superstitious... To change her is beyond me and I have been praying her since I know she has cancer 5yrs ago. God is gracious, doc said she only has 5 months but she stayed on for 5yrs, so I guess god has given her many chances... On her death bed , I tried to pray for her, bring brothers n sisters to see her, pastors n reverends... But none of these seem to change her... Only god will know where is she now..

 

[Ace1234]

Well, I personnaly don't believe in an eternal hell, I don't find one in the bible, but be that as it is it would be very sad, all of us would have loved ones, parents, spouses, children, friends in eternal torture forever, in fact the mass of humanity throughout the ages would be going there.

I lost my mom 6 months ago, I know how terrible it is and how she loved Christmas. She died of COPD, a hard death. When Doctors know the end is near they will increase meds greatly to bring it to a quicker end, course it's seen to deal with pain. When my mom got worse the last few days it was terrible, he increase her morphine greatly and she died....It's hard to lose mom, I guess it would be harder to think they're going to hell after so much pain on earth.

I hope you find peace with it.....

 

[Dwarfs8]

Well, I personnaly don't believe in an eternal hell, I don't find one in the bible, but be that as it is it would be very sad, all of us would have loved ones, parents, spouses, children, friends in eternal torture forever, in fact the mass of humanity throughout the ages would be going there.

I lost my mom 6 months ago, I know how terrible it is and how she loved Christmas. She died of COPD, a hard death. When Doctors know the end is near they will increase meds greatly to bring it to a quicker end, course it's seen to deal with pain. When my mom got worse the last few days it was terrible, he increase her morphine greatly and she died....It's hard to lose mom, I guess it would be harder to think they're going to hell after so much pain on earth.

I hope you find peace with it.....

yes, i can't forget about the trauma we all had in the hospital with her... she has lung cancer and thus has water in her lungs... we have to send her for operation, only to have her being infected which triggered her heart attacks while recuperating... she got worse day by day, by the end of third week, she went home, and we thought that she would get better, but she didn't... She went back to hospital cos she's dying of pain.... the doc kept increasing her morphine cos she couldn't breath but even the maximum lvl couldn't help anymore on her last days... she even tried to end her life by taking out the mask herself but we wouldn't allow her...so the doctors decided to sedate her. it was so sad. Every time i had to rush to the toilet in her ward to cry before i went back to console her... I love her so much and we weren't there when she has left in her sedation...

I tried hard not to think that she's going hell... as me too was thinking... if i could love my mom so much, wouldn't God love her even more?? but... i don't know, i really don't know what to think...

 

[Ace1234]

I'm sorry, I know your pain. I had the best mom in the world, most giving person I have ever known. I don't think mine should've died. She fought her COPD,,well, actually more pulmonary fibrosis for years, she got pneumonia, spent time in the hospital, but no doubt sent home before the infection cleared. Just a few weeks later pneumonia hit her again badly, in ICU for a month. After that they sent her home with hospice, stating she had a month to maybe a year, maybe more.

She did rather well, was on a oxygen tank, but would have bouts that put her down, struggle for breathe, spit up gobs of brown junk, but would get her stable.
I was shocked, I visited her at my sisters one day and she had done her hair, makeup and was even walking outside, she looked normal. That night she relapsed. She was suffering so I could only hear her saying "someone kill me" We finally sent her to the hospital, her Doctor said it was a matter of time, highly increased her morphine....in just a few hours I watched her die....It's most heart breaking as you know.

Don't feel guilt over you should've done more, her salvation is in God's hands, not yours. I believe you will see her again.

 

[for_his_glory]

Death of a loved one is hard enough to handle especially if you were close. When my dad passed away my sister was talking to him about Jesus even though he was in a coma as some say even though they are comatose they might be able to hear, but not respond. We can only hope they made that death bed conversion to Christ and move on with our lives and hold dear to the good memories if one has any to hold on to.

 

[Classik]

You don't need to blame yourself, Dwarfs8. I know how you feel. It is quite painful...but you did preach to her. You thought she never listened. You believe she never did. She had appeared indifferent, you've said.

But you can't prove anything. What if she had received Christ before she finally died.

 

[Dwarfs8]

I'm sorry, I know your pain. I had the best mom in the world, most giving person I have ever known. I don't think mine should've died. She fought her COPD,,well, actually more pulmonary fibrosis for years, she got pneumonia, spent time in the hospital, but no doubt sent home before the infection cleared. Just a few weeks later pneumonia hit her again badly, in ICU for a month. After that they sent her home with hospice, stating she had a month to maybe a year, maybe more.

She did rather well, was on a oxygen tank, but would have bouts that put her down, struggle for breathe, spit up gobs of brown junk, but would get her stable.
I was shocked, I visited her at my sisters one day and she had done her hair, makeup and was even walking outside, she looked normal. That night she relapsed. She was suffering so I could only hear her saying "someone kill me" We finally sent her to the hospital, her Doctor said it was a matter of time, highly increased her morphine....in just a few hours I watched her die....It's most heart breaking as you know.

Don't feel guilt over you should've done more, her salvation is in God's hands, not yours. I believe you will see her again.

what ur mom's been thru sound like what my mom been thru too... i can only understand why one would like to die faster when in great pain, as i've been thru it too...

thanks... i guess u are right. Nobody can believe God on other's behalf... i also can't help still praying for her... did you? Is your mom a christian?

 

[Dwarfs8]

You don't need to blame yourself, Dwarfs8. I know how you feel. It is quite painful...but you did preach to her. You thought she never listened. You believe she never did. She had appeared indifferent, you've said.

But you can't prove anything. What if she had received Christ before she finally died.

ya... nobody knows... i'm just judging from her last days reactions on her death bed...

 

[Dwarfs8]

Death of a loved one is hard enough to handle especially if you were close. When my dad passed away my sister was talking to him about Jesus even though he was in a coma as some say even though they are comatose they might be able to hear, but not respond. We can only hope they made that death bed conversion to Christ and move on with our lives and hold dear to the good memories if one has any to hold on to.

yes, the doc did tell us they can still hear us in her sedation.. but i don't know, i guess i can only trust God's love for her...