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[__ Prayer __] Not cut out for motherhood

M

Malaika

Member
Today is my 21st birthday.

I got perfect shortly after turning 18 and graduating high school. This was an unplanned pregnancy, my child's father is not very much involved.

I accepted God into my life a few months after giving birth but have sice struggled with my faith. Recently after trying to reconcile with my daughter's father briefly, I attemptef suicide by throwing my car off the highway. I was not harmed by the wreck but ran into some legal trouble while trying to get help due to being under the influence of marijuana.

I've "re-dedicated" my life to God, but I don't feel like I'm doing enough or that I am on the right path. I just said a prayer for forgiveness of any sins committed today but this whole "pursuing God/dying to self/getting into heaven thing", is making me very depressed. I guess I finally realize why grace is so important (an epiphany I just had as I'm typing). We can never do enough and obeying the law just shows how inadequate we are, but I'm srill stuck between wanting to please him and knowing that I can't without faith (Hebrews 11:6
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.)

Anyways, this whole situatoon is stressing me out and causing me to be veeeery short-tempered with my 2 year-old daughter. I ask that anyone reading this pray for my daughter and I that I can raise my daughter in a Godly fashion and not be so stressed about being a "good Christian" (since Mark 10:18 states "
"Why do you call me good?" Jesus answered. "No one is good--except God alone.") and just let the Spirit indwell in me.

God bless and thanks, in advance, for the prayers.
 
Happy Birthday, Malaika :wave2And welcome to CFnet!

Welcome to the trials and tribulations of parenting a 2-year-old. You & your daughter are in my prayers.

If you don't already have one, buy a children's Bible. It has lovely & colorful pictures, with great Scripture presented in a way that children can understand. Then, each evening as you tuck her into bed, you're going to read to your daughter from the Children's Bible. Not only will she receive the benefit of her Mom reading to her (which will have a long-lasting results!) but she'll also be getting the basics of Scripture for a great starting foundation to her own faith someday.

You will also benefit from reading to her. You're wanting to strengthen your faith. Reading from the children's Bible to your daughter is a form of raising her right, and what you read will provide incentive for your own reading & studying of your own Bible. This strengthening is very important to your faith.

Our Lord loves you very much. He loves your daughter very much as well. He understands that not a single one of us is perfect; He also understands how we sinners do strive to walk more perfectly in our faith. He also knows we can't read the Bible in one day and understand 100% immediately.

So, please stop beating up on yourself, my new friend. Take a deep breath, and start focusing on Scripture in small steps. You've turned your life and your heart to our Lord's loving care; His embracing grace and mercy will remain constant with you!

And please give your daughter a hug and a kiss for me. She's a very special gift to you, and will grow up before you know it. Enjoy the time you have with her!
 
Hi Sister Malaika, and welcome to our Christian fellowship. As God’s child you are a work in progress as He works in you to will, and to do of His good pleasure (Php 2:13). You being here is evidence of wanting something better for you. The great thing about cooperating with Him as He replaces your old nature of despair with new hope in Christ is that there will not be consequence of sin, and replaced by no self condemnation (Rom 8:1) as you take hold of your new life. The desire to raise your daughter in a Godly fashion is wonderful, and its implications far reaching when faced with a life of hope that brings peace not only to you, but her also. Be diligent to continuing seeking God’s best for your family, go before God’s throne of grace often, and sit back in joy as you see the results, and as David said in Psa 51:12, restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit. May God bless you as you walk forward in Jesus’ name, and my prayers go with you as you allow the Holy Spirit to do the thing in you God desires.
:wave2
 
Hi Malaika and Happy Born Day!

First, smile God loves you.
Second, smile again because God loves your daughter too!

Well I am going to ask you to smile one more time because all of your spiritual brothers and sisters love you!

Ok enough smiling already.

Sometimes I sit and just reflect on my life. There are many times that I can honestly tell you that I failed. I failed my loved ones. Failed my beautiful children. Failed God. Failed myself. What now what do I do, how do I fix it? Answer is you can't. But thats ok. God saw us before we were born and YET He still loved us so much that He let His son die for you and me. Why would He do such a thing, I've failed so much, why would God even care about little ole me?

That is what makes Him awesome. God loves us despite our sin. Rest in knowing God is smiling down on you and is keeping you close to His heart. The fact you reached out on this forum is an act of faith.

Please accept this simple prayer for your life, God, I know You as a God full of mercy and grace. Simply Lord shine round about Malaika and her daughter. I am asking You to show her how much You love her. Even now Lord, give her the peace that only You can give. I thank you God. You are an awesome God worthy of our praises for ever and ever. I ask humbly in Jesus name, Amen.
 
Happy Birthday, Malaika . We are happy to have you here. I will pray for both of you and your little girl's Daddy, too. I can't say anything more than all the love that has been expressed by our brothers and sister, in Christ who have spoken before me.
God Bless :hug
 
Hello Malaika, :wave

Welcome to the forum.:hug We are so glad God brought you here. :amen

How are you doing?

I'm praying for you and your daughter. :pray

Blessings,

Army Wife :cool
 
Army WIfe said:
Hello Malaika, :wave

Welcome to the forum.:hug We are so glad God brought you here. :amen

How are you doing?

I'm praying for you and your daughter. :pray

Blessings,

Army Wife :cool
Click to expand...
I'm doing better now. Just taking things one day at a time!

Thank you for your prayers!

I'll pray for you as well!
 
hey, Malaika...

hang in there. You and your family are in my prayers. Christianity is an ongoing thing, a growing relationship with Christ and also personal, moral development along the way. I say this as someone who just got saved 2ish years ago and I'm just now really starting the journey, lol.

Motherhood is a struggle. My mother sometimes chafed at being a mom. I used to whine about that, but now I'm older and I think I get it...kids...you invest a lot into them, they're human, you're human, a lot is expected of you as a mother...its...well, hopefully rewarding, but also quite the job.
 
Christ_empowered said:
hey, Malaika...

hang in there. You and your family are in my prayers. Christianity is an ongoing thing, a growing relationship with Christ and also personal, moral development along the way. I say this as someone who just got saved 2ish years ago and I'm just now really starting the journey, lol.

Motherhood is a struggle. My mother sometimes chafed at being a mom. I used to whine about that, but now I'm older and I think I get it...kids...you invest a lot into them, they're human, you're human, a lot is expected of you as a mother...its...well, hopefully rewarding, but also quite the job.
Click to expand...
Thank you so much for your prayer. You'll be in mine as well!

Yes, I still have a lot of growing to do in Christ. I gave tried to give my life to God two years ago, a few months after my daughter was born (reading the Bible etc.), but this is the first time I've actually tried developing a RELATIONSHIP with Him and already I'm noticing changes and aversion to sin (even though I still fall..he's taken away the big whoppers like unhealthy relationships, fornication, etc.)

I don't mean to talk your ear off, just wanted to say thank you for keeping us in your prayers!
 
naw, don't worry. I talk peoples ears off all the time, lol. I dunno...around here, I'm a "mental patient," so nobody listens to me. So...I have God and I have this forum. That's pretty much the people who listen, lol.
 
Hello Malaika,

Happy belated birthday! I pray that you are doing better than you were before.

Have you found a spirit filled church in your area, yet? If not, might I suggest you find one? I have been through the wringer of life on more than one occasion, and well nothing can ever supplant Christ in your life for support, seeing Him manifest in others can be incredibly encouraging and enriching. Jesus tread in places the average Christian would condemn and never consider, because the sick need the doctor Mark 2:17, but he surrounded Himself with his disciples and retained many close friends of similar mind and heart. The same can be said of the apostles.

I applaud you for reaching out on this forum, home to many wonderful saints. We will definitely be here for you.

Remember, you are not alone. He is with you always, even to the end of the age.

Blessings, Sister! My prayers are with you and your daughter.
 
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