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As I age out of this Earth, I find the corruption more and more intolerable. When I first went on disability, I was in absolute denial I had any serious emo/psycho problems. Working in a male ego dominated refinery, I was unwilling to try and find help. This was almost entirely due to how deep the denial lay in my ego. While it is most probable that I suffered chemical exposure, that alone was not my only problem. I showed symptoms very much in line with excessive DEA, H2S, Benzene exposure. DEA causes massive high blood pressure in rats and God knows dumping the DEA column to atmosphere along with that very valve failing resulted in substantial exposure. H2S was ever present in that unit and constant low level exposure was inevitable. Symptoms for that is loss of balance and short term memory loss. Most chemicals wash from the body as time w/o exposure proves this out. Benzene is one that is well known to wash out of the body over time. H2S, on the other hand, is equally well known NOT to wash out. I still suffer imbalance and short term memory loss. My publisher's corrupt hatred proves this out as I forgot my Quarterback's name in my story and they failed to correct this. My quarterback has two names for the same guy. I did things like this multiple times, but between myself, my wife and my son, we usually caught it.
When things first fell apart in my life and I was unable to continue working, an army of private investigators, informants, undercover cops was unleashed upon me. Doctors began being paid off. Family, friends, neighbors, co-workers began cashing in in any way they could. We tried moving to acreage away from Houston, but soon found ourselves having garbage dumped on our property as well as being run off the road. This indicated state-wide participation in this oppressive behavior. Our son's food was tampered with and he developed H-Pylori which doctors in Texas refused testing/treatment for. This led to our son wasting away before our eyes as he could not swallow food. We put him on a liquid diet to keep him alive. At age 15, he slipped to a little over 80lbs. We quickly sold the land and several assets to move from Texas. A few years later, we moved to Hawaii. I wanted to see just how deep the corruption went. In Hawaii our neighbors were recruited to shun, spy & commit crimes. Our son was chased from job to job.....same as Houston. When a store manager would hire him they would be fired.....happened twice. If his shift leader refused to abuse him he'd be reassigned and another took his place. Our son was repeatedly over worked and/or placed in dangerous situations. This revealed this was now a Federal government involvement situation. I greatly fear the FBI and the SS Administration. Especially the Houston field offices of both. My daughter was recruited and hired by an FBI informant to assassinate a money laundering target. She and the informant split $50k. Shortly after that she tampered with a weeks worth of my meds by squirting a liquid on a pill caddy's contents of pills. I fear having a hit put on me and/ or my son. I figure I am living on borrowed time and might as well go out with a bang. I want to run for Texas governor and expose this before I am killed. If I broke any laws then they surely would've locked me up and thrown away the key. This is the perfect storm of government corruption hell I have to live with and this is still not even all of it. Not even most of it. Please pray the Lord reveals His will for us. I will go down fighting and offer my life as a Martyr to save kids being harvested over the border. I'll gladly give my life to save kids. Please pray.
 
Sounds a lot like a person that has stage 4 cancer. That according to some people is the best diagnosis to have. Why good? The doctors will not argue with anything the patient wants to try. I am not saying you have cancer. I am saying alternative treatments might be looked into. Do I have any in mind? Not really.

Massive amounts of IP224
1Peter 2:24
….
A merry heart does good like a medicine but a broken spirit dries the bones. (From memory)
Proverbs 17:22
….
Philippians 4:8 kjv
8. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things arelovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there beany praise, think on these things.
….
hawkman may be encouraging.

I am praying.

Mississippi redneck
eddif
 
I’ve come to suspect that disability makes one a target. People around here will say his family cannot help him and if he isn’t working put him in the state hospital…

I’m beginning to see that even my long term counselor is just another mental health professional. Are any of them that different? I dunno 🤷‍♂️

My situation is getting better in some respects creepier in others. I’ve had 2 or 3 incidents now recently in which I’m pretty sure someone was following me on the road. I’ve heard people around my place openly complain about things I have. I don’t live large but apparently a modest decent lifestyle is unacceptable to a lot of vocal people.

I’m prescribed a fairly standard mix for my diagnosis. This includes a low low dose of as needed neurontin for anxiety. People openly complain about it which raises the rather obvious question 🙋‍♂️ how do they know?

But overall I am blessed and more comfortable than I can claim to deserve. It’s the creepy oppression that bothers me…
 
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