Christ_empowered
Member
- Oct 23, 2010
- 14,230
- 10,717
ugh. file this one 1 under -needless drama- ugh :-(
I have a modest, but nice, 2 bedroom apt./condo. good times. I was chilling in the back bedroom -- it faces out back towards the lake, away from the parking area -- and bam! nothing broke. dark already, so I can't see if someone threw something or if someone jumped up or...??? (ground floor).
I don't feel...un-safe or super-scared...but junk like this has been intensifying. I kinda suspect someone messed with the brakes on my new car. no way to prove it, but...brakes generally last longer than 20 K miles. Plus...
the HOA raised everybody's fees to put in more security features, and it hasn't happened again. so, there's that.
I dunno. its not that I'm perfect, its just...saved, forgiven. but that's a big part of it, I think. "it is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me...," and...
man oh man. look at what they did to Jesus, right? Right...
"God's work in this world is -always- met with opposition." I read that in a book, once. That I think explains a lot of it, really. I've been truly, genuinely saved for almost 10 years and The Lord has been nothing but Kind to me. I'd go so far as to say He has brought and is bringing true Deliverance, in the here and now. Praise God!
Its just...ridiculous. and unnecessary. and frustrating. more frustrating than frightening. not because I'm tough alpha male (LOL), but because I try to loop on: "perfect love casteth out -all fear- ...," and His word truly helps, in important ways.
Meanwhile...
people were yelling at 3 AM a couple of nights back to back. I mean...its a complex, something like 20 buildings of apt/condos, some green space, nice...modest, but nice. I don't see how that's acceptable. but OK? I mean...it woke me up, but what am I going to -do- about it, you know?
I just...get frustrated. and down about it, too. its isolating, and frustrating. I don't understand why some people -- in my case, it seems to be more men than women (gay, celibate, no longer flaming...) -- who are -open- and -vocal- , but I get static from women, too. lol.
i think, now...a lot of it boils down to how poor people are treated. if my parents weren't in the lower rungs of the well to do, I'd be in a group home or on the streets. 0 funds of my own, only adult child. Its The South, so...I was accused of doing sexual stuff to a higher status female, way back when. thing is...again, not into the ladies, and b) a lot of that is just how poor men in the south are treated, especially when we/they "don't know your place," etc. ugh. frustrating :-(
sorry to ramble. I have so much to be thankful for, and I'm...getting there. life is based more on little, hum drum moments...doing the dishes, doing the laundry, getting the groceries...than on DRAMA! TRAUMA! and...FEELINGS! I'm...starting to get that, at long last.
but this is decidedly un-fun, lol. so, there's that. Thanks.
I have a modest, but nice, 2 bedroom apt./condo. good times. I was chilling in the back bedroom -- it faces out back towards the lake, away from the parking area -- and bam! nothing broke. dark already, so I can't see if someone threw something or if someone jumped up or...??? (ground floor).
I don't feel...un-safe or super-scared...but junk like this has been intensifying. I kinda suspect someone messed with the brakes on my new car. no way to prove it, but...brakes generally last longer than 20 K miles. Plus...
the HOA raised everybody's fees to put in more security features, and it hasn't happened again. so, there's that.
I dunno. its not that I'm perfect, its just...saved, forgiven. but that's a big part of it, I think. "it is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me...," and...
man oh man. look at what they did to Jesus, right? Right...
"God's work in this world is -always- met with opposition." I read that in a book, once. That I think explains a lot of it, really. I've been truly, genuinely saved for almost 10 years and The Lord has been nothing but Kind to me. I'd go so far as to say He has brought and is bringing true Deliverance, in the here and now. Praise God!
Its just...ridiculous. and unnecessary. and frustrating. more frustrating than frightening. not because I'm tough alpha male (LOL), but because I try to loop on: "perfect love casteth out -all fear- ...," and His word truly helps, in important ways.
Meanwhile...
people were yelling at 3 AM a couple of nights back to back. I mean...its a complex, something like 20 buildings of apt/condos, some green space, nice...modest, but nice. I don't see how that's acceptable. but OK? I mean...it woke me up, but what am I going to -do- about it, you know?
I just...get frustrated. and down about it, too. its isolating, and frustrating. I don't understand why some people -- in my case, it seems to be more men than women (gay, celibate, no longer flaming...) -- who are -open- and -vocal- , but I get static from women, too. lol.
i think, now...a lot of it boils down to how poor people are treated. if my parents weren't in the lower rungs of the well to do, I'd be in a group home or on the streets. 0 funds of my own, only adult child. Its The South, so...I was accused of doing sexual stuff to a higher status female, way back when. thing is...again, not into the ladies, and b) a lot of that is just how poor men in the south are treated, especially when we/they "don't know your place," etc. ugh. frustrating :-(
sorry to ramble. I have so much to be thankful for, and I'm...getting there. life is based more on little, hum drum moments...doing the dishes, doing the laundry, getting the groceries...than on DRAMA! TRAUMA! and...FEELINGS! I'm...starting to get that, at long last.
but this is decidedly un-fun, lol. so, there's that. Thanks.
