[__ Prayer __] small town rumors

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Still swirling around me, LOL.

I don't get it. People are still yelling about "warrants," "jail," "prison," etc. Thing is...I have -1- conviction on my record. Its a serious ("Class A") misdemeanor, related to stuff w/ a former psychiatrist (yeah...I'm a "trouble maker," LOL). When that went down, my parents were able+willing to hire a good lawyer, so ended up w/ a plea bargain, probation. I was released from probation 2 whole years early, because of good behavior.

So...when I look at God's work in my life, I'm astounded. I mean...I was -wretched-, no doubt about it. Now, I"m definitely a work-in-progress, but...its amazing how much progress I've made, by God's grace, in the 5 years since I got saved.

Now, when I go out in the yard, people wil taunt me with stuff like "yeah, congratulate Dr.(former shrink)!!!" and "he better get ready for prison" and "when are they serving the warrant?"

Of course, people around here think of me as "trailer trash" and/or "working class loser," so they probably don't think I had a lawyer when everything hit the fan. The only people I've talked to about it are the mental health people treating me and some friendly acquaintances from back in the day who keep in touch with me.

Ugh. Social class issues are a big factor in my situation. Basically, when I was put in a private, for profit mental hospital at age 20, my parents were (to quote a former counselor) "rinky dink middle class," but they had good insurance. Now, mama's retired, dad's still going strong in his job, and they're more upper middle class/"comfortable"/whatever. But..its a small, southern town; you're a "working class loser" at age 13, that's pretty much all they'll ever let you be (trust me on that one).

OK. Basically, I once again and asking for prayer, for my family and for me, please. I've been praying for "The perfect love that casteth out all fear" and forgivness for my spirit of timidity, and The Lord has brought me a long, long way. I don't get nearly as fearful and straight up paranoid as I once did, because of His work in my heart+life. I'm thankful.

Thanks. :-)
 
Still swirling around me, LOL.

I don't get it. People are still yelling about "warrants," "jail," "prison," etc. Thing is...I have -1- conviction on my record. Its a serious ("Class A") misdemeanor, related to stuff w/ a former psychiatrist (yeah...I'm a "trouble maker," LOL). When that went down, my parents were able+willing to hire a good lawyer, so ended up w/ a plea bargain, probation. I was released from probation 2 whole years early, because of good behavior.

So...when I look at God's work in my life, I'm astounded. I mean...I was -wretched-, no doubt about it. Now, I"m definitely a work-in-progress, but...its amazing how much progress I've made, by God's grace, in the 5 years since I got saved.

Now, when I go out in the yard, people wil taunt me with stuff like "yeah, congratulate Dr.(former shrink)!!!" and "he better get ready for prison" and "when are they serving the warrant?"

Of course, people around here think of me as "trailer trash" and/or "working class loser," so they probably don't think I had a lawyer when everything hit the fan. The only people I've talked to about it are the mental health people treating me and some friendly acquaintances from back in the day who keep in touch with me.

Ugh. Social class issues are a big factor in my situation. Basically, when I was put in a private, for profit mental hospital at age 20, my parents were (to quote a former counselor) "rinky dink middle class," but they had good insurance. Now, mama's retired, dad's still going strong in his job, and they're more upper middle class/"comfortable"/whatever. But..its a small, southern town; you're a "working class loser" at age 13, that's pretty much all they'll ever let you be (trust me on that one).

OK. Basically, I once again and asking for prayer, for my family and for me, please. I've been praying for "The perfect love that casteth out all fear" and forgivness for my spirit of timidity, and The Lord has brought me a long, long way. I don't get nearly as fearful and straight up paranoid as I once did, because of His work in my heart+life. I'm thankful.

Thanks. :)
sorry to hear about this

praying for you to be the head and not the tail - more than a conqueror in Christ Jesus - because he who curses you is cursed and he who blesses you will be blessed - Genesis 12:3 - as you are Abraham's seed and a recipient of the promises God gave to Abraham - Galatians 3:29
 
thanks again.

I'm prone to paranoia, anyway. The Lord has brought me a long, long way with all that, and I'm thankful. Still...its...crazy...now that I've been saved 5 years, The Lord has forgiven me and transformed me, to sense and know...

how much bondage and oppression I existed in and under, in years past. I mean...whoa. And now, when I hear all this stuff, its just a reminder...the world around me is the same, many of the people around here are pretty much the same...by God's grace, I'm different now, and I'm "in the world, but not of it," which is (obviously) a major blessing.

Anyway, I'm happy to be off probation. I completed 3 out of the 5 years, they let me off. That was 1 year ago. God is good! That adds tremendously to a sense of -true- freedom.
 
thanks again.

I'm prone to paranoia, anyway. The Lord has brought me a long, long way with all that, and I'm thankful. Still...its...crazy...now that I've been saved 5 years, The Lord has forgiven me and transformed me, to sense and know...

how much bondage and oppression I existed in and under, in years past. I mean...whoa. And now, when I hear all this stuff, its just a reminder...the world around me is the same, many of the people around here are pretty much the same...by God's grace, I'm different now, and I'm "in the world, but not of it," which is (obviously) a major blessing.

Anyway, I'm happy to be off probation. I completed 3 out of the 5 years, they let me off. That was 1 year ago. God is good! That adds tremendously to a sense of -true- freedom.
wow - praise God - awesome testimony
 
thanks again.

I think...The Lord has willed miracles in my life, for my family and for me. I realize now I'm not the only one...and I definitely needed miracles, big time, when I got saved. So...God is good!

Facing "the real world" is a part of growing up, especially as a Christian. As a Christian, its good to know what the world around me is like--"wise as serpents, innocent as doves"--but not be conformed unto the ways of this world. Maybe this is part of the sanctification process, for me? I dunno.

Anyway, thanks for the prayers and replies. Means a lot to me. I -had- a shady, horrible past, and now...I've been off probation (2 years early!) for 1 year now, I'm reconciled to my parents, moving forward, etc. I don't know if this talk of "jail," etc. is small town rumors, or just taunts from the angry townies, but...this too shall pass (by God's grace).

:-)
 
thanks, everyone.

God's work in my life is -- to me, and to my family-- amazing. miraculous, even. I "get," now, that seeing a low status, ridiculed, despised individual made...whole, remarkably normal, an overcomer...rubs people the wrong way, especially in a small, southern town environment. I was in and of the world, too, until The Lord dealt with me 5 years ago and I got genuinely saved, so I"m not trying to sound too, too judgmental towards those still in darkness, but...whoa. being on the receiving end of this stuff can get get rough, obviously.

I think I"m getting better at it. It just gets rough, when people yell stuff like "if he was a couple years younger, we could do something with him" and "when's he going to PRISON?," etc. but..."its the way the world works," I guess. I was a genuine, bona fide weakling until fairly recently. Now, I'm a work-in-progress, but...I'm healthy, bright eyed, a bit taller, I have social skills, I've even got the "high(er) IQ" estimate going, my parents and I have reconciled, and...

ugh. oh well. The Lord has spared me so, so much...this stuff now isn't pleasant, but its not really -bad-, not compared to what came before (shudder) or what -could- be happening, right now

thanks again. :-)
 
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