[__ Prayer __] Where is my God?

[sufferingUSMC]

Ladies and gentlemen, Ive come to the end of my line, Im tired. I need prayers, strong ones. You see, I attended church growing up. I fell away, came back and attend a nice church now. But one thing has remained the same, my addiction.

I saw a pornographic film at the age of 8 while staying the summer with an older brother and his wife. They must have thought I was asleep, I was not. Since then, sex was on my mind. Im 31 and married now. I still struggle with this addiction. When Im alone, I look at porn and over the years tastes grew different and here I am today....dead on the inside. There was something constant about it though....I always felt conviction. I started to realize I had a problem years back and spent time talking with people about it. Nothing changed. I would spend many nights crying in the bathroom alone pleading and begging God to just help me. To no avail. Recently, when I look atmy wife, I fight tears it hurts me so bad to see her when I know what I do.I found myself contemplating removing myself from the situation and sparing her the pain and of knowing the man who loves her with everything he is, cannot get this fixed.

Im on day 4 of no pornography. Ive made it farther before. But im not happy. Instead I am more emotionally distraught because Im afraid its going to come back....the thoughts, the "just a quick peeks" . I know it has to be demons but it feels as though God doesnt here me, and if he does, whydoesnt he help me? Im crying now and just dont know what to do. Sorry to open up this way but I need prayer. I need God to intervene and fast.

 

[AirDancer]

You & your family are in my prayers, SufferingUSMC.

Contending with any addiction is quite the challenge. But you're not alone in this battle. You belong to our Lord, and He never abandons us. He listens to our prayers!

Take it one day at a time - or 10 minutes at a time, like a friend of mine does with stopping a smoking addiction. Spend time reading/studying your Bible, and of course, spend time talking/praying with our Lord. Trust in Him completely; He is there for you. He loves you & wants only the best for you!

Be blessed!

 

[TonkaTim]

I'm no expert on this subject, but I know coming to awareness of any of one's failings is the best first step to overcoming them. I've read articles about how one's proclivities develop specific areas of the brain. So it may take a little bit for your thoughts & desires in your brain to begin to rewire. Though I have full confidence you can overcome. I'll keep you in my prayers & leave you with advice from the Apostle Paul:

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. 9Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

 

[hallowbonnie]

i too struggle with this problem you are definately in my prayers.God strengthens me everytime I get further and further.From glory to glory his grace covers you.

 

[YosefHayim]

1 John 1:8-2:6
This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin. If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts. My dear children, I am writing this to you so that you will not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate who pleads our case before the Father. He is Jesus Christ, the one who is truly righteous. He himself is the sacrifice that atones for our sins—and not only our sins but the sins of all the world. And we can be sure that we know him if we obey his commandments. If someone claims, “I know God,” but doesn’t obey God’s commandments, that person is a liar and is not living in the truth. But those who obey God’s word truly show how completely they love him. That is how we know we are living in him. Those who say they live in God should live their lives as Jesus did.

SufferingUSMC, I know the power that pornography can hold over you. I also know that power that Jesus Christ has. Do you know which power is stronger? The answer is Jesus Christ. Pray to Jesus, confess your sins, and ask him to give you the strength that you may break your addiction. Admit that you are a sinner and that you cannot take care of your own problems and you are in need of his help. Give yourself fully to him. Though we may backslide, Jesus continues to work in our lives, and we will be convicted, tested and tried. We can be cleansed.

1 Peter 5:7 tells us that Jesus wants us to cast our worries to him for he cares for us.

James 4:7
Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Remember that Jesus Christ will hear your plea if you repent and confess that you are in need of a savior and that you can not handle the issue yourself. Jesus provides the strength. Trust him to lead you out. 1 John also tells us that as children of God we will defeat the evil world. We will conquer evil, but only if we have faith in Jesus Christ. Just one sin is enough to separate us from God, but through his infinite grace and mercy and unfailing love, he provides us with the solution that we can not. The solution is Christ Jesus our Lord and Savior.


Ephesians 6:12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

Here are some very powerful videos that have helped me with my struggles.

[video="youtube;l_7PtWDCMXQ"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_7PtWDCMXQ[/video]


Her name is Shelly Luben, and she is an ex-porn star that exposes the industry.


http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCcAGIt2_ACffHyVlkAaPejQ

Where is my God?

Psalm 46:10-11
Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth. The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge. Selah.

Romans 8:37-38
Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.




Romans 5:18 (NLT)
Yes, Adam’s one sin brings condemnation for everyone, but Christ’s one act of righteousness brings a right relationship with God and new life for everyone.

 

[Eugene]

Dear Brother, please consider the following battles Paul faced as a Christian. Job came to the point of testing he said in Job 3:3, Let the day perish wherein I was born, and the night in which it was said, There is a man child conceived.

Rom 7:15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.
Rom 7:16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.
Rom 7:17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
Rom 7:18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.
Rom 7:19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.
Rom 7:20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me.
Rom 7:21 I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me.
Rom 7:22 For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:
Rom 7:23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
Rom 7:24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
Rom 7:25 I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin.

Rom 8:1 There is therefore (Looking back at everything Paul just said) now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus! Living in the condemnation you express will not allow spiritual growth. Remember that we are God’s work in progress Eph 2:18, and it is Him now working in you to will and to do of His good pleasure.

1 Pet 4:12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: If you don’t have something to overcome as far as the world, you become lukewarm as satisfied in what you are and have.

1 Pet 1:7 That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ. As with the prophets, I don’t read of the lotus land of ease when we begin our walk With Christ. Once saved you belong to Him who will conform you into the very image of His Son Jesus; in fact He saw you in Him before the foundation of the world. Rom 8:29.

Blessings in Christ Jesus.

 

[stovebolts]

Hello and welcome,

I don't know really what to say as I've never been in your position, but I can pray "Dear Lord, help this man to be freed from his addiction and help him to grow closer to his wife and strengthen their marriage".

When God created Eve out of Adam's rib, he did so because God saw that it was not good that Man did not have a suitable helper. Upon Adam seeing Eve he said, "This is bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh" and the two were in perfect union.. perfect harmony.

We now live in a fallen world through the willful disobedience of Adam when he did something he knew he wasn't supposed to do and the first repercussion of his willful disobedience was a shattered relationship with his wife Eve. For the first time he sees her not as bone of his bone, flesh of his flesh in perfect unity, but rather, for the first time they both distinctly mark out their physical differences and in shame of their differences which once were complementary, they now try to hide those differences, though they are clearly seen.

Your marriage is sacred and know that I'm speaking in a soft tone, I am not speaking down to you. But you need to put your efforts into serving your wife and getting to really know her as you know yourself. Let me explain. Have you ever came up to somebody you knew that couldn't look you in the face and you got that funny feeling only later to realize that they had did something wrong to you, and they couldn't look at you in the face? Better yet, have you ever said or done something wrong to somebody and because of it you couldn't look at them in the face? It's because your withholding from them. By withholding, I mean your hiding something from them and like both Adam and Eve, your trying to cover something up that is clearly seen, although at times not recognized. This type of behavior causes separation and like Adam, "This is the woman YOU gave me" we start to focus our time putting the attention on others in an attempt to hide what we did wrong. You see, there is an old saying, but it's very true. When I point the finger at you, I've got two more pointing back to me.

When you look at other women, you're doing something against your wife. Your betraying her trust and because of that, your withholding all of who you are to her. When you have sex with her, are you thinking of the other women you've seen in porn? Do you see pictures of those acts in your head when your making love to your wife? If so, can you see how your not connecting with your wife in the bedroom? More importantly, can you see how your withholding from her? Your not in perfect union with her and she is not a part of you. Rather, she is an object of exploit for your fantasies. Now then, please don't think I'm saying all of this in accusation to you. I don't know if it applies to you or not and again, I am speaking in a compassionate voice, not a harsh demeaning voice because you've reached out to perfect strangers for help, and it is my desire to hopefully give you something to strive for.

Women are not objects, they are human beings and your wife needs you, all of you. Learn to meet her needs and trust me, we are all continuing to lean how to do that. Our marriages are either growing or declining and there is no such thing as a stagnate marriage. Your heart is in the right place, but now you need to start acting on it, but not only for a couple of days, but for the rest of your life. Show your love to your wife by laying your life down for her and by that, I mean put her first and die for her. Take what is separating you wholly form her and put it to death. When you catch yourself wanting to look at another woman, or are being drawn back into porn, think about how much you love your wife and how you want to give her all of you knowing that when you watch porn, your withholding from her and as such, it's straining your relationship.

Grace and Peace

 

[Brother Mike]

I know it has to be demons but it feels as though God doesnt here me, and if he does, whydoesnt he help me?

I was addicted to porn myself. I did not have the Internet at the time, but working for a software company I could get my hands on all kinds of adult Kodack CD's. I ordered a box of 150 porn VHS's from a company I came into contact with out in California for only 50.00. What a great deal!!! only 50.00 to help destroy my life. Can't beat those prices as a lot of times it cost much more to destroy ones life.

I would spend many nights crying in the bathroom alone pleading and begging God to just help me. To no avail.

So your a Christian................ That is good, but you really have not posted anything here that tells me you have tried any solution to get rid of the porn in your life. You have done absolute nothing to fix this problem. You have the nerve to say that God does not help you, and Pleading with God is to no avail. Shame on God for being so lazy huh? Must be all God's fault.

Reminds me of watching Hells Kitchen, someone would burn something and tell Chef Ramsey that the meat got stuck to the pan and the pan got to hot. Chef would scream...... So it's the pans fault??? you Donkey!!!

You plead day and night to no avail............ My prayers don't work.................. Amazing how that happens, yea?

Jas_1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

I want you free, if your serious you may P.M me. It's going to take diligence and changing a few things. You will be amazed on just how much you already can be free.

Blessings.

Mike.

 

[YosefHayim]

I don't know really what to say as I've never been in your position, but I can pray "Dear Lord, help this man to be freed from his addiction and help him to grow closer to his wife and strengthen their marriage".

This reminds me of the quote that Matthew Henry said in his commentary:
“Eve was not taken out of Adam's head to top him, neither out of his feet to be trampled on by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected by him, and near his heart to be loved by him.”

 

[Sparkey]

There are many things that make me wonder about the goodness of God. His goodness is astounding! There are other things that cause me to doubt that this same goodness is being worked into me.

My response, when I was first called to turn to the Lord and to walk with Him was to say, "Are you sure?" I had no doubt that what was being offered was a good deal for me, I mean really! The deal was that I could trade my shame for His righteousness. But it seemed too big of a job. There were too many things that came to mind showing me that I was not worthy. The only thing that tipped the scale of incredulity was the fact that for God all things are possible. Today, many years later, the struggle continues.

We are told to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling because it is God that works in us both to will and to do of his good pleasure. There are two separate acts described there. The will to do His good pleasure is part of it. There is something that is being planted into you today - and that something promises to grow into something greater. Something called fidelity. Jesus is faithful. We are to become like Him. The will to do this is part of our change. The starting part. The way to do it is also promised.

I think that is why James said that we are to ask, nothing doubting, when we ask for wisdom. God knew you when you were called. He formed you in the womb and has intimate knowledge of how to lead you toward what you long for, to be like Him.

When I think about prayer, perhaps there is some poetic justice involved in asking for prayer on the internet concerning a sin that is so promoted on the internet. But we can't lay hands on you, can't look into your eyes as we hear your confession, can't act next week to find you and say, "How's it going, brother?" Can't really hold you accountable. My prayer today is that the Lord leads you to those you may trust to join with you in prayer, not only here, but also in a physical "as touching" manner.

 

[Sparkey]

I've just poured myself a cup of coffee and had a chance to think about what lead me to reply to your thread. You might be surprised to hear that a grandma here on CF.net sent me a PM and asked me to speak to you.

You're in her prayers. This reminded me of something that a Pastor told me once. He said he'd like to share a secret and had mentioned the prayers of grandmothers in the church. They have experience in entrusting their loved ones through three generations to the Lord. What my pastor said was that if I ever wanted to really get prayer, that I would do well to go to these prayer warriors.

Sometimes it's not just the hale and hearty ones, not the ones who speak boldly in front of others that have the ear of God - but instead, the members who talk to Him daily and whisper their hearts that cause His hand to move. That 'secret' is tried and found true by me. Each part of the Body of Christ is being fitted together by the Holy Spirit. Yes, I will lift your name to the Lord and will ask Him to continue the work that He has started in you. So also do others, silent ones, that our prayers, joined with yours, are heard.

 

[Brother Mike]

Yes, I will lift your name to the Lord and will ask Him to continue the work that He has started in you. So also do others, silent ones, that our prayers, joined with yours, are heard.

Eph 1:17 That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him:
Eph 1:18 The eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints,

Eph 3:16 That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man;
Eph 3:17 That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,
Eph 3:18 May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;
Eph 3:19 And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.

Mat_9:38 Pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he will send forth labourers into his harvest.

Col 1:9 For this cause we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to desire that ye might be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding;
Col 1:10 That ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God;

2Pe_1:3 According as his divine power hath given unto us all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory and virtue:

Col 1:9.................................................................... be filled with the knowledge of his will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding;

Sparrowhawke, the type of prayer you prayed are the ones Given by the Holy Spirit, they are the Word, these prayers do not return void. If you read all the examples of how to pray for someone it's not so they can be delivered out of the box, not healed, not set free. ALL prayers for people are focused so that they have no hindrance to seeing what is true getting wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of God. Once they have no hindrance from the enemy and God opens their eyes they get what is true and made free.

Knowing they see things clearly after praying they have to get in the Word and get busy themselves. It is a two way process as you said, the will to do your part, the Lord will do his, our part is to clear the cobwebs out of the way so that what is true is understood and seen clearly.

I agree with you, God will send someone in their path, as that is scripture and scripture can't be broken for those that believe it's true, nothing wavering.

Mike.

 

[sufferingUSMC]

Thank you everyone. About half way through my day today, I happened to turn on Christian radio while driving. The next 3 songs seemed to be all about the feelings I had. I talked to God today and am feeling better. Day 5, no porn. I am on my tablet which has a parental program called k9 which will not access anything risque. I used a sporadic password so I will never remember and can never turn it off. I have also thrown out my laptop. I will attempt to reply to everyones questions but I really appreciate the support and prayers.

I did not mean for it to sound like I blamed God for anything. I just wanted to know why I have struggled with this for so long. Its been years. I do it, I feel ashamed, I vow its over and bam right back again. Even at times saying to myself "you shouldnt do this" followed by the old "its natural for guys". Ive had my pastor praying for a while now. Which concerns me. What if hes given up on me? Growing up I was taught that God only gives you so many chances. Could I have struggled so long that Im now lost?

 

[sufferingUSMC]

On another note, my wife and Iwillbe starting daily devotions.

 

[Brother Mike]

On another note, my wife and Iwillbe starting daily devotions.

More Word, more time with God = Stronger spirit man and less falling for temptation.

Mike.

 

[Claudya]

Do you have any support in real life or online? Because you are BY FAR not the only one struggeling with porn addiction. There are websites and support groups out there helping people like you.
I'd guess having buddies that can support and help you and hold you accountable for what you are doing would be a great help, as would knowing that you are not alone with the problem and hearing how others have managed to overcome it. And maybe some day you will be the one encouraging porn addicts by telling them how you overcame it...
Really, get yourself some help. You're not alone with your problem, and you don't need to suffer all by yourself.

Also, good luck for keeping it up for day 6! You're in my prayers as well.
And should you relapse (hopefully you won't, but just in case...) don't hate yourself, just start over again with another day one (don't ask me how many attempts I needed to stop smoking, it's embarassing how oftern I relapsed within hours... yet some day I made it and it's been almost a year now. So relapsing is normal, and it doesn't mean that you are never going to make it). We won't hate you either, and neither does God.
You can come back here and tell us how you are doing and ask for prayers. Or just vent your feelings. We'll be reading your words, and we will keep praying for you.

 

[iLOVE]

Please watch! Dr. Tony Evans, The Purpose Of The Cross (Returning To The Cross)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=gSuSmtBN8xU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=YLSvnblH4wo

You must understand the "Message Of The Cross"!

 

[sufferingUSMC]

Day 6
Isaiah 55:7
Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on them, and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

 

[Whiteshield]

I have this problem too. Longest without porn is like 7 months. When people in church find out you were a porn addict, good luck with your future relationships there. Lots of girls will stay away from you

 

[reba]

Good for them they should stay away... It is not a wifes responsibility to heal her husband or viceversa