[__ Prayer __] Where is my God?

[Brother Mike]

I have this problem too. Longest without porn is like 7 months. When people in church find out you were a porn addict, good luck with your future relationships there. Lots of girls will stay away from you

I think that would be a good thing for a porn addict to have girls stay away, right? Girls don't like it because is shows a girl that a man is insecure and lacking confidence. Two big things that turn girls off in a man. A man that needs to look at porn also has a low social value, and girls are looking for men to raise their social value, not lower it.

Mike.

 

[Claudya]

I have this problem too. Longest without porn is like 7 months. When people in church find out you were a porn addict, good luck with your future relationships there. Lots of girls will stay away from you

Yeah church people can be weird about sexuality; but your church just doesn't need to know. It's non of their business. And you don't need to feel like you are hiding a dark secret. It's just non of their business.
Also, while some girls may turn away, those that turn away aren't the girls you'd want anyway. The real good girls would know that beating an addiction is a sign of strength and maturity; and they would know that there is no person without dark sides and weaknesses. Oh, and don't underestimate how girls are also struggling with their sexuality. There's many many girls out there who understand you because they are going through similar things. So let the judgemental girls turn away so only the wise ones will remain.

 

[sufferingUSMC]

I have this problem too. Longest without porn is like 7 months. When people in church find out you were a porn addict, good luck with your future relationships there. Lots of girls will stay away from you

You know, regardless of what a fellow Christians struggle is, we are supposed to be able to seek help and support from those within the church. Church was good this morning. Because of work, we hadn't been there in 2 months. I did confide in my pastor and he said " I'm glad you are back, this sermon is for you". And man was it. Although I am far from fixed, I feel better. I wish you luck with it. Tomorrow will be a week. I'm looking forward to be done. As a point in the sermon said, I am avoiding the temptation. 4 questions to ask yourself every day

Am I becoming a man of the word?
Am I praying?
Am I avoiding temptation?
Am I being truthful?

 

[Brother Mike]

Am I becoming a man of the word?
Am I praying?
Am I avoiding temptation?
Am I being truthful?

Sounds like a very good sermon. The Lord gave us Pastors, teachers, Prophets, Apostals and Evangelist for the perfecting of the saints.

You should add.....

Am I meditating on God's word and do I speak the word only?

Here are some things I started with in the 90's and did these everyday. There are more as the list was long but you get the idea. Battlefield of the mind gave me an idea for a scripture confession book.

From Joyce Meyer:

I love all people, and I am loved by all people.

I prosper in everything I put my hand to. I have prosperity in all areas of my life – spiritually, financially, mentally, and socially.

All my children have lots of Christian friends, and God has set aside a Christian wife or husband for each of them.

All my household are blessed in their deeds: we’re blessed when we come in and when we go out.

I take good care of my body. I eat right, I look good, I feel good, and I weigh what God wants me to weigh.

I operate in all the gifts of the Holy Spirit, which are tongues and interpretation of tongues, the working of miracles, discerning of spirits, the word of faith, the word of knowledge, the word of wisdom, healings, and prophecy.

I know God’s voice, and I always obey what He tells me.

The love of God has been shed abroad in my heart by the Holy Ghost.

I do all my work excellently and with great prudence – making the most of all of my time.

I am creative because the Holy Spirit lives in me.

I love to pray. I love to praise and worship God.

I am purposed that my mouth shall not transgress. I will speak forth the righteousness of God all the day long.

I have humbled myself, and God has exalted me.

I am a giver. It is more blessed to give than to receive. I love to give! I have plenty of money to give away all the time.

I cast all my care on the Lord for He cares for me.

I don’t give the devil a foothold in my life. I resist the devil, and he has to flee from me.

 

[Eugene]

You know, regardless of what a fellow Christians struggle is, we are supposed to be able to seek help and support from those within the church.

Easy to say, but hard to realize. In our growth in grace and knowledge of Christ, we are all at different levels, and what may not affect my walk may offend another; they may not have the grace to yet handle it and as another here said, there's no reason for them to know. E.g., you're crazy for some some married women in the church, can't take your eyes off her, and have the need to confess to her those feelings. She feels the same way and that really is bad, or she tells her husband and he breaks your head.

God is at work in you, and He is not neglect in that which He allows as the trial of your faith. 1 Pet 1:7. The things God is allowing in your life gives you opportunity to overcome, and be of counsel to others facing similar problems with the flesh. God may not have you raise someone from the dead, but He may equip you to help the walk of another along the way; learn it well.

2 Cor 1:5 For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.
2 Cor 1:6 And whether we be afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation, which is effectual in the enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer: or whether we be comforted, it is for your consolation and salvation.
2 Cor 1:7 And our hope of you is stedfast, knowing, that as ye are partakers of the sufferings, so shall ye be also of the consolation.

 

[hallowbonnie]

I agree with claudya .There are women who also deal with this struggle myself being one.Every person in church has issues ,like they say at my church no perfect people allowed and thank goodness there are no perfect people because every single person definately needs christ.

 

[sufferingUSMC]

Been sitting here in the dark talking to God for quite some time. I feel as though he's given up on me.

 

[AirDancer]

Ah, but our Lord NEVER gives up on us. He's always with us.

It's time to turn on the lights & open your Bible. At times like this, I find so much comfort in Psalms. Our Lord loves you tremendously... immerse yourself into His Word!

 

[Whiteshield]

That would be all well and dandy, but what happens if you keep it a secret, but someone who knew you in the past spreads it to other members of the church? What really puts me down is because I've quit watching it for a long time now and they still think I still watch it. Is this how it is in all churches? I mean they easily accept ex-drug addicts, but when its me, its like I'm the plague or something

 

[Claudya]

That would be all well and dandy, but what happens if you keep it a secret, but someone who knew you in the past spreads it to other members of the church? What really puts me down is because I've quit watching it for a long time now and they still think I still watch it. Is this how it is in all churches? I mean they easily accept ex-drug addicts, but when its me, its like I'm the plague or something

Sorry to hear that. :-(
Yeah church gossip is a problem in many churches. Even among christians there are insecure, unsatisfied and envious people who can only build themselves up by putting others down. If you are in the situation you are describing then I guess you you have the options of either starting over in a different church where nobody knows your past; or do as Jesus us: be loving and kind to your "enemies" and don't let them bring you down (guess that's gonna take a lot of strength); or next time someone treats you like the plague you could call them out and if their behaviour is really about your porn addiction you can inform them that you haven't watched a single porn in months and that their blindly trusting in gossip is not quite a christian quality.
Or you could make a cause out of it: Start a ministry or a support group for people struggeling with porn. Besides the help you can give to other porn challenged guys and girls, noone can gossip any more because you're all candid about it, and I bet more than one person will praise you for adressing that problem. Girls may admire your courage and openness (guys speaking openly about their struggles and experiences are hot ;-)).

Oh well, sorry for hitting you with the advise bat. I wouldn't want to be in a situation like that.
Just saying that you aren't helpless about it and shouldn't let it put you down.

 

[Claudya]

Been sitting here in the dark talking to God for quite some time. I feel as though he's given up on me.

What makes you think so? What proof of His love and attention would you need in order to make you stop feeling like that?

Hope you feel better today when you wake up.

 

[Whiteshield]

Claudya, the girl I love hates me now. It happened yesterday. It would be great except that the one who said it was a missionary. I looked up to her at one point a long time ago. Then when I was in the place where she was having her missions, she was gossiping behind my back literally and I heard every word. The other missionary told her 'if I would even say bad things about her' its really a shocker to me because we were in good terms in the past. Then there is also my brother in the Lord who hates me. He used to help me grow in my Christian life when I was in high school. I swear I heard him say 'he looks like he's gonna commit suicide' too after he saw how down I was the entire day.

 

[stovebolts]

Been sitting here in the dark talking to God for quite some time. I feel as though he's given up on me.

I understand how you can feel that way. I've been in that spot a few times.

Scriptures state: I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I believe that passage is Phillipians 4:6???

The passage doesn't say God is going to do everything for you. He already gave you his son, John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he GAVE his only begotten Son.

Your sins are forgiven and as scriptures state, You're a new creation IN Christ.

As I said earlier, we live in a fallen world and we are part of God's plan in reconciling the world. Don't take this wrong, but I don't think that God is going to take your addiction away just because you ask him. But what I do think God is doing is he's teaching you to lean on him and to trust him. He's building a relationship with you because he wants to be there with you so you really know that he's there with you. If he "Poof" took your addiction away, when would you ever turn to him? Only when you needed something?

God's pricking your heart and he's growing you... while pruning other parts of you. Pruning hurts, but it's part of growth and when you get past this, it will only be WITH God's help and by with, I mean you and God in union... together.

I can do all things THROUGH Christ who strengthens me.

All things...

Grace and Peace brother. God's doing great things in your life.

 

[Chopper]

Hi Marine. I have read a lot of reply's to your post and I didn't see any with a PLAN for your deliverance. You need to understand that your mind is like a replay on a football game. It stores images from your youth to present time. It can play an image at any time based on your own thoughts, a thought from the Holy Spirit, or a thought from the demon who is assigned to you. James says in chapter 1 verse 15 "But each one is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and when sin is fully grown brings forth death." I wanted you to see a progression of your thought life. A thought brings up an image from your past, a replay, If you dwell on that thought, your emotions kick in and your emotions almost always seeks an outlet to satisfy that emotion and that, in your case, is masterbation. Thoughts that are not sexual demand other forms of expression. 2 Corinthians chapter 10 verse verse 5b says "Take every thought captive to obey Christ." What that means, Marine, is when the thought or pornographic image displays in your mind, you have to think, would Jesus think this? Of course the answer is no! then it's time to stop the thought. You are a Marine! At Paris Island you had to reach into your self the strength to keep going. I'm asking you to exercise that same courage and strength to fight against that thought or image and immediately think of Jesus on the cross fighting for you. Whatever you do don't resort to masterbation or replace making love to your wife with some pornographic image. Stop and remember that God wants the marriage bed to be undefiled. Again switch your mind to Jesus and how much you need to be obedient to Him. Do what I say and then praise Jesus for his power to help you. Think of Jesus as much as you can every day. Eventually, if you don't resort to a sexual expression of that thought, but think on Jesus, YOU WILL HAVE VICTORY.

 

[jasoncran]

I understand that at times, all to well. why this will sound cliché but it does work for me and others. when I am down and think I am evil and I do often. I have a hurt that I haven't mentioned to my wife, pastor or even close friends here. only in hints have I said anything of what it is. there is much more then the self-loathing I have for what I am, or rather perceive. anyway. I must stop looking at me and poor evil me and focus on the Great god who saved me, that seems to take the pain levels down. does it take it way fully? NO, but I then realize that god allowed godly men to have hurts and used them. he didn't forsake them and I aslo remind my self this shall pass and often what I think is bad isn't often that bad but simple lie from hell.

I add this to help you understand what I am under a part of the lyric from the sound need you now.

,though,though I walk through the shadows I am so afraid, please stay, please stay by my side

if we feed that will be taken by it. I am no better at this then you. for some time at medina's gym I didn't get what he was saying to me about my countenance and my sharp and stern look I carry. I must learn to let go and allow god to give my joy. something totally foreign to me. but perhaps you may see this in you and learn to let god give you joy in the trial you face.

 

[Swoon]

Browsing through the replies I am surprised no one ever mentioned fasting.
SufferingUSMC, it matters not how long you've been doing it. You must first come to understand that it is not by your might nor strength, but by God's spirit alone (Zechariah 4:6).
All those 'negative' thoughts which linger in your mind are all lies. You say God has given up on you? 'he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6.
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39

I was addicted for 6 years and overcame with fast and prayer and most importantly with the help of the Holy Spirit(i am no longer 'tempted' with such things). It is very crucial for a Christian to know their Bible because you will be firm. Come any tempest or attack you will not be moved as long as you're firm upon the rock.
Remember God is a fair and just God and does not allow us to get tempted beyond what we can withstand. Prayer is the key. Get up in the middle of the night and pray. Fasting - humble yourself before the Lord and he shall lift you. I don't know much about what you do or what you believe but I know what I am talking about. Seek and you shall find.
I would like to know more about you, I would really like to help you.

 

[sufferingUSMC]

Thank you all. Day 8. Devotional for the day dealt with how God must cleanse us everyday, our thoughts and actions. I will say that the days are going by slow. How great is our God!!? I am spending more time in the word and it feels good. But that feeling of not connecting to him because he's turned from me still comes. I know its fear bread from Satan and even though I read his promises, I still feel it. I'll have to try harder.

Fighting battles I cannot win on my own, I have given them to the Lord, I don't have to have the burden anymore. That's what the alter is for.

 

[Chopper]

Hi again Marine. I like what "Swoon" said about "fasting" it is an extremely powerful tool to bring in our great Helper, the Holy Spirit, and to resist Satan! As you practice the discipline of not eating it causes you to advance in "self control" of which you need to conquer pornography. I have often fasted at noontime. Using that time to conquer something in me or to pray for someone else. It works!

 

[sufferingUSMC]

Thank you all. Day 9. Turned on the Christian radio station just in time to here a sermon on sexual sins. Coincidence? I think not. Glory to God.


Lord, please keep me going. I need you.

 

[stovebolts]

Hello again sufferingUSMC,

I just wanted you to know that you are an encouragement to many as you share your temptations. Just look at all the views of this thread, and how many replies you have received.

Fight the good fight Brother and keep shining!