I am not a wife nor have I ever been a wife so I don't have anything to offer here except perhaps, as a single women of God, I follow the word of God as my basis of belief and the leading of the Holy Spirit, since I have no responsibilty in regards to a husband. However, when I am part of a church, ministry or outreach, I submit to whoever the leader is of that ministry....
You know, it is just dawning on me after reading this answer what the apostle Paul may have been referring to when he told the Corinthians that a married person will have more trouble. The single person is more free to seek God with everything he or she has, especially regarding seeking the gifts, which I believe do not come automatically, otherwise Paul would not have told the Corinthians to seek for the greater gifts (1 Corinthians 12:31, 1 Corinthians 14:1).
25 Now concerning virgins: I have no commandment from the Lord; yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in His mercy has made trustworthy. 26 I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is: 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be loosed. Are you loosed from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you...
32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord—how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world—how he may please his wife. 34 There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. 35 And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction. (1 Corinthians 7:25-28, 32-35).
I think serving the Lord without distraction enables the unmarried to pursue Him all that much more for gifts that he encouraged the churches to seek. He also mentioned that married couples should be fasting together, which is also involved.
5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
In other words, a husband and wife had to agree together to go into a fast, because any lengthy fasting would take a toll on their sex life, and if one gave him or herself to it while the other did not, the one whose flesh was still at full strength might become more easily tempted to commit adultery if their physical needs were not being met by their marriage partner. A single person has no such obligations or concerns.
Just struck me as fascinating how - and this is again my opinion, but - most of the great women of God appear to have been single, such as the prophetess Anna, who was continually in the temple of God fasting and praying, or Miriam, who was a leader in her own right and whom scripture says was neither a wife nor a mother.
The writer of the Jewish Women's Archive seems to take a little issue with Jewish authors down through history insisting she had a husband.
Unlike most women in the Bible, Miriam is never called wife or mother. She has neither husband nor children. Jewish traditions, however, cannot tolerate her status as single. The historian Josephus deems Hur the husband of Miriam (Antiquities 3.54; see Exod 17:10–12). Rabbinic sources give her Caleb for a husband and Hur for a son (but compare 1 Chr 2:19).
https://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/miriam-bible#:~:text=She has neither husband nor,1 Chr 2:19).