Dating an unbeliever

[cosmicutopia]

I have a question for you all...

I am friends with a guy and a girl. I hang out with them from time to time. The guy is an unbeliever and will sometimes say things and quotes that are not in the bible (from other religions, buddhist etc..) when she is stressed and tells her to research other religions... His master is clearly not God - Matthew 6:24. I find it interesting she did not start wondering about other religions and asking questions about her faith before this guy...

They have taken naps in the same bed, among other things, so this is clearly not a healthy Christian dating situation.

She has brought herself onto this man... and to be honest seems quite ignorant about the holiness of what a man and a woman being together should be. It is hard to stand by seeing these things sometimes.

But my question is this.. Is it my place to say something to her or him? Or is that "their business" and should not be interfered with.. Should I leave it to God?

Is 2 Corinthians 6:14 applicable here?

 

[Jakeness]

As a fellow non-believer, I can say that if a friend "went all holy on me," so to speak, I think it would severely rupture the friendship. The chances of them listening to you, I would think they are very slim. If what they do really bothers you, bring it up to them in a nice way, they might take what you say into consideration. Just don't go about it acting like this lady. :p

Personally, if I were a Christian and in your situation, I wouldn't do anything about it. What they do doesn't hurt anybody, and if he researches other religions, then he has a good idea of what Christianity is like and chooses not to follow it.

 

[Mike]

Jakeness, no offense by what I'm saying to the OP.

Would you rather this is move to Christian Talk and Advice?

It sounds like your question is directed to fellow Christians for spiritual advice. If that's the case, and unbeliever is not going to give the discernment that you are looking for. He may have had a point there about her following her heart and not your advice, but I would disagree and say it is incumbent on you to speak to her. If she doesn't listen, get another Christian and speak to her in Truth and Love.

Matthew 18 (NIV '11)
<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23743">15</sup> “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23744">16</sup> But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23745">17</sup> If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23746">18</sup> “Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.
<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23747">19</sup> “Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.<sup class="versenum" id="en-NIV-23748">20</sup> For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”

It may sound harsh in the end, but we've gotten away from taking this final approach when a brother or sister does not repent. There have been many threads on this topic, mostly from one involved. A marriage will be terribly difficult if one is lead by the Lord and the other isn't.

 

[Jakeness]

None taken. I just figured that since she was dealing with a non-believer, that the point of view from a non-believer would be of value for this kind of situation.

 

[theLords]

I have a question for you all...

I am friends with a guy and a girl. I hang out with them from time to time. The guy is an unbeliever and will sometimes say things and quotes that are not in the bible (from other religions, buddhist etc..) when she is stressed and tells her to research other religions... His master is clearly not God - Matthew 6:24. I find it interesting she did not start wondering about other religions and asking questions about her faith before this guy...

They have taken naps in the same bed, among other things, so this is clearly not a healthy Christian dating situation.

She has brought herself onto this man... and to be honest seems quite ignorant about the holiness of what a man and a woman being together should be. It is hard to stand by seeing these things sometimes.

But my question is this.. Is it my place to say something to her or him? Or is that "their business" and should not be interfered with.. Should I leave it to God?

Is 2 Corinthians 6:14 applicable here?

I recommend you talk to the Christian girl in the love of the Lord. Don't say anything to the unbeliever, there's no point. That guy is not bound to God, but she is.

Of course, do all of this very, very prayerfully. Follow the gentleness of the Holy Spirit

 

[Elijah674]

I have a question for you all...

I am friends with a guy and a girl. I hang out with them from time to time. The guy is an unbeliever and will sometimes say things and quotes that are not in the bible (from other religions, buddhist etc..) when she is stressed and tells her to research other religions... His master is clearly not God - Matthew 6:24. I find it interesting she did not start wondering about other religions and asking questions about her faith before this guy...

They have taken naps in the same bed, among other things, so this is clearly not a healthy Christian dating situation.

She has brought herself onto this man... and to be honest seems quite ignorant about the holiness of what a man and a woman being together should be. It is hard to stand by seeing these things sometimes.

But my question is this.. Is it my place to say something to her or him? Or is that "their business" and should not be interfered with.. Should I leave it to God?

Is 2 Corinthians 6:14 applicable here?

This should already have been PREACHED from the pulpit many times over in faithful church's for the answer to be known.

2Cor. 6:12-18's big picture does not stop with only marriage. But includes 'being yoked to the world' from start to finish. Even look at the females dress! Old Israel we are told wanted a King like the heathen nations, and God said that they rejected Him ruling over them! And Samuel was to PROTEST BITTERLY but was also to let them do their thing! And you can find what the results were!

And we see all through the Bible these verses telling us the same picture. Personally...:yes 'i' see the Holy Spirit leading you, but not by coming to ask questions of us for what He has already told you. Rom. 8:14. You have a spiritual brain, so use it!

EXERCISE your walk with God alone! (not Jer. 17:5 ones) What will be done with Rev. 18:4 which is a REAL TESTING, when we go to ask the ones that we are requested to 'COME OUT FROM'?? And why is that?? Read the verse again!

Your choice with your question should be an easy one to react to. But the last question from me to you is like pulling teeth! All of these Rev. 17:1-5 church's have the earthly educated, the professed gentle loving false teachers in them. So take ones pick, which is it that we want to listen to??? NONE! Rom. 8:14 is to be your & my TEACHER!

--Elijah

 

[mrroy1937]

One does not have to look to far to see that this girl is flirting with spiritual disaster. If you are concerned as a friend, you should talk to her. If she rejects your concern, that's her deal. I would continue to pray for her that she be enlightened to what God wants in people's lives. You may not get too far because she is not showing the fruit of one who is being led by the Spirit of God.

 

[makinbacon]

Is 2 Corinthians 6:14 applicable here?

I do not believe the Scriptures to teach a prohibition on Christians engaging in relationships with non-believers. I do believe the Scriptures discourages it. Give what you've told us, I believe your friend would be wise to reconsider the relationship.

 

[matt633]

I do not believe the Scriptures to teach a prohibition on Christians engaging in relationships with non-believers. I do believe the Scriptures discourages it. Give what you've told us, I believe your friend would be wise to reconsider the relationship.

^^^^This! I'd pray for her and not condem her. We're all growing and developing in Christ. Apparently she has not reached that level of development. Invite her out with other believers. She may be the one to win her friend over to Christ. Demonstrate the love of God.

 

[Rinid]

one thing you can do is get her thinking about what she is doing. Very gently address some of the problems she is looking at. He will pull you to look at other religions, are you strong enough in your walk to look with him at them? Is it important to you to stay with your beliefs or is it ok if you get away. by askin some of these questions you get her to see what struggles she is going to have, what some of the outcomes, both good and bad could be and see if she is willing to accept both outcomes. Then she'll start seeing where the relationship is going and what it's doing to her and she'll have to make the decision if it's where she wants her life to go. important thing I would say is not to be judgemental, be open and ask them accepting either answer. I would guess your going to get a lot of I don't know. I would doubt that she has givin it much though and so the idea is to get her thinking about the outcomes of where she is going then start askin if that is what she wants. We don't generally want to get away from god so once she notices that's where she is going she'll start to question the relationship. If you do this lovingly and without judgement then she'll have more questions later on. She'll feel that she can talk to you about them and that's when you'll be able to give the advise she'll listen to.