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Divorce And Remarriage

jasonc said:
well then if one is divorced from a person and then gets saved and that other person is remarried then what? the saved person is commiting adultery?im not saying that person cant reconcile but sometimes as paul said god calls one to peace. and in that context it was talking about staying married to an unbeliever and paul said he or she departs then god has called you to peace.
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jasonc said:
well then if one is divorced from a person and then gets saved and that other person is remarried then what? the saved person is commiting adultery?im not saying that person cant reconcile but sometimes as paul said god calls one to peace. and in that context it was talking about staying married to an unbeliever and paul said he or she departs then god has called you to peace.
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When I first replied, I was talking about under what conditions a Christian was allowed to divorce. I don't expect non-Christians to obey God's commandments. When we come to Christ, God forgives us of all our past sins. In the case of divorce and remarriage, things can be a bit complicated, especially if there are children involved. Then they would be faced with a choice between two options, neither of which was really according to God's will. Staying married to their second spouse would mean continuing in an adulterous relationship (according to Christ's own words and assuming the reason for the divorce wasn't adultery), but getting a divorce from their second spouse would mean leaving the kids in a bad situation. Neither option is good. I don't feel qualified to give advice in such situations, other than that people should seek God's will in each individual case and do as He leads.

The TOG​
 
So the whole thing in a nut shell is, that when your first marriage didn't work out and you did not divorce because of the reasons that Scripture gives to do so. You are still married to your first wife or husband.
 
Lewis said:
So the whole thing in a nut shell is, that when your first marriage didn't work out and you did not divorce because of the reasons that Scripture gives to do so. You are still married to your first wife or husband.
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That's the way I understand it.

The TOG​
 
The reason my first marriage failed was
1: on my part, I lied to myself about the "red flags" he displayed when we were dating. And we dated for 4 years! I was too immature to be married and should've lived on my own for some time first!
2: He let pornography lead him into adultry. I forgave him the first time, but when I confronted him the 2nd time to make a choice "her or me", he took a swing at me.
Saying that though, I detest being divorced- not because I have any feelings for my former spouse, but because I failed. Fortunately though, God forgives us for our failings and for that I am so very grateful. I'm in my 2nd marriage and I took all of the lessons I learned from the first to heart. My husband and I make it a point that in this marriage divorce is not an option.
 
ReginaForbes said:
The reason my first marriage failed was
1: on my part, I lied to myself about the "red flags" he displayed when we were dating. And we dated for 4 years! I was too immature to be married and should've lived on my own for some time first!
2: He let pornography lead him into adultry. I forgave him the first time, but when I confronted him the 2nd time to make a choice "her or me", he took a swing at me.
Saying that though, I detest being divorced- not because I have any feelings for my former spouse, but because I failed. Fortunately though, God forgives us for our failings and for that I am so very grateful. I'm in my 2nd marriage and I took all of the lessons I learned from the first to heart. My husband and I make it a point that in this marriage divorce is not an option.
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If you let your heart rule you that can happen.I am guilty of that.You try and make all kind of excuses such as "oh in time after we are married it will get better" or "maybe I can change him".Both are lethal excuses.I broke up with my x husband a couple of times when we were dating.It just broke my heart because he was sending me flowers and begging me to come back.I guess I was just too kind.Look what it cost me.
 
TOG said:
When I first replied, I was talking about under what conditions a Christian was allowed to divorce. I don't expect non-Christians to obey God's commandments. When we come to Christ, God forgives us of all our past sins. In the case of divorce and remarriage, things can be a bit complicated, especially if there are children involved. Then they would be faced with a choice between two options, neither of which was really according to God's will. Staying married to their second spouse would mean continuing in an adulterous relationship (according to Christ's own words and assuming the reason for the divorce wasn't adultery), but getting a divorce from their second spouse would mean leaving the kids in a bad situation. Neither option is good. I don't feel qualified to give advice in such situations, other than that people should seek God's will in each individual case and do as He leads.

The TOG​
Click to expand...
I have pondered divorce more then I have posted. im not saying im right just that some must leave for sanity and cant handle that person for their safety, or health of their kids.

my wifes ex husband raped a girl and never was charged, he also beat my wife to the point her daughter took a shotgun and charged it and said, you have a choice continue and die or let go and walk. she was 12. we can ask my wife if she wasn't married to me to remarry that man if the kids didn't trust him and she still had. even if he repented. one isn't obligated to remain with said person. they cross a line. I know that isn't biblical but if they break that line its one that I believe isn't an easy thing to repair if at all. they would have to really, really demonstrate that change.

would you marry the woman whom raped you?
 
Question: "What is a concubine? Why did God allow men to have concubines in the Bible?"

http://www.gotquestions.org/concubine-concubines.html
Answer: A concubine is a female who voluntarily enslaves and sells herself to a man primarily for his sexual pleasure. Concubines in the patriarchal age and beyond did not have equal status with a wife. A concubine could not marry her master because of her slave status, although, for her, the relationship was exclusive and ongoing. Sometimes concubines were used to bear children for men whose wives were barren. Concubines in Israel possessed many of the same rights as legitimate wives, without the same respect.

Although it’s true the Bible nowhere explicitly condemns concubinage, a condemnation can be found implicitly from the beginning of time. According to Genesis 2:21-24, God’s original intent was for marriage to be between one man and one woman, and that has never changed (Genesis 1:27). As a matter of fact, a study of the lives of men like King David and King Solomon (who had 300 concubines; 1 Kings 11:3) reveals that many of their problems stemmed from polygamous relationships (2 Samuel 11:2-4).

The Bible never explains why God allowed men to have concubines. He allowed divorce and polygamy, too, although neither was part of His original plan for marriage. Jesus said God allowed divorce because of the hardness of men’s hearts (Matthew 19:8). We can assume the same hardness of heart led to polygamy and concubinage.
 
Marriage is such a complex issue and it is my opinion, after years of study, meditation and prayer, that when two people couple, in the eyes of God, they are married. I do teach this and if a person teaches this from the scriptures, it can make them very unpopular.

Teaching on biblical marriage and remarriage, as per scripture, need taught to every one of our teens, as early as possible. To view my perspective is quite simple. Go to the very first marriage, Adam with Eve, there was no license to pay a tax for and the ceremony was very simple; God presented Eve to Adam and at some point, soon I believe, they joined together, they were married.

Next look to Issac, his bride, he had never met, arrived and went into his mother's tent. He, likewise followed her in and they came out, married. And then there is Israel, a.k.a. Jacob. Jacob worked seven years to pay for his wife and when he was to go into her, as I read it, her father helped him to become drunk and then sent him into her older sister, Leah. After they coupled he had married the wrong girl and worked seven more years to earn the one he loved.

Because of this I teach the back seat and the Drive In Theatre are, possibly two of the worst inventions of mankind. This is a very good demonstration that mankind is full of sin in need of forgiveness, me included if you did not understand that I have been to an outdoor movie. My wife is my fourth wife, so I am a mess!

My wife, now, is the only wife I've had since I was saved and God has forgiven my sins before, all of them. God created us, sexual beings, and Paul even taught us it is better to be married than to be in endless lust. In short, this remarriage thing is usually looked at in the wrong context.
 
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