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[__ Praise __] Shouldn’t be happening…

Joined
Oct 23, 2010
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Praise report!

Basically the last 15 years of my life should not have happened and what is happening right now…10 years into coming to my senses and believing upon Jesus…

Definitely not supposed to be happening.

I turned 23 in a city going back to school. I had 95 iq following deliberate over medication by shrinks and some sort of involuntary brain operation also by psychiatrists. I had serious arrest records my parents were teetering on the edge of bankruptcy and I had untreated hiv and cancer. I knew about the positive hiv test result didn’t know I had cancer. Funny thing about a lot of psychiatric treatment…

It isn’t just about lowered IQ. It was about facial tics and liver damage and memory loss and dead eyes and inability to function in society. Moving on…

Had a so called psychotic episode more involuntary shock and an involuntary lobotomy. I think ? the whole point was to just shut me up since my parents were also probably going to lose their careers and I was most definitely on society’s discard pile. Moving on…

Fun fact a brain scan showed that I should be paralyzed and on a ventilator. I guess all the more reason for a lobotomy? So…

My parents ended up both getting promotions and raises. They both retired fully and completely. Mama is still dealing with having worked so long in a white collar den of vipers. Eek ?

They’re doing well financially. I’m labeled schizophrenic but I somehow have a high IQ estimate. 145 150…I dunno ?‍♂️ I enjoy not having obvious brain damage. Aside from that I see it mostly as Gods work of redemption, especially since people would literally call me a 95 IQ weakling back in the day. Ugh ?

No standard treatment for hiv cancer or anything else although I did have my first antibiotic prescribed in over 10 years recently. I had an ear infection but I’m otherwise healthy,

I dunno ? I’m praising God because I get too scared and double minded and unstable at times and I think a lack of genuine gratitude ? is still part of the problem. And…

In my late 30s I apparently look more like early 30s. I’m thankful and it lines up with other Christians testimonies of physical healing. And…

Im saved and growing in the faith albeit unevenly and with occasional setbacks. Happens. My parents…? Good people! Wonderful people! Believers…? I pray God will bless them into relationship with Him.

I spent some time with them today and…

I hope ? our ongoing relationship isn’t just them feeling guilty. I dunno ? I love them and I am trying to build a life of my own so it’s not that I’m obsessed with this it’s just…

I do hope and pray to be made functional enough to be a help to them as they grow older. I’m not out of touch with tea or anything now but I’ve got a ways to go in terms of social functioning. But that’s another issue..,

I’m labeled with schizophrenia which means I’m at best essentially invisible and lately an outsider many openly say should be committed. No psych hospitals in 15 years btw. This raises the question ?‍♂️

what to do when the labels stick and get used against me in a hostile community that’s probably not that different from anywhere usa ?

Rambling…

Praise concerns prayers. You know me…

Thanks ?
 
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