Why Do Other Christians Blame Those With Chronic Illness?

[Luminous_Rose]

Where does this idea even come from?

Why do other Christians blame people with chronic illness by saying, "You're in sin!" or, "This was an act of God!" or, "You've been smited by God!"

These things are so immensely hurtful. I'm at a point right now where I'm so fed up, I almost don't want to be church-going Christian anymore. I'm about to give up on church, I don't want to be with people like that...I know the God's truth, but I'm so tired of people and their ridiculous ideations of chronic illness = sin.

Being a chronic illness sufferer since I was a child, what could I have possibly done to deserve a life long illness?

I was talking to my own mother today. My husband and I had a friend that made a lifestyle choice that goes against Christian belief and God's word. He ended up with the same type of health issue I do and was having problems here and there and was more recently hospitalized. My husband and I reached out, made sure he was okay, if he needed anything. I feel for my friend...even though they have made horrible choices...I still care because I know what it's like...he also had an issue with this in his teenage years, but it was a one-time thing and it was considered a one time stress induced problem by doctors, but now with all the stress he's had at work, the odd hours, the lack of sleep, not drinking or eating enough at work, etc. have all brought this to the surface. When my own mom said, "Maybe it was an act of God..." I froze a moment...my own mother here...I have the same type of health problem...what am I then?

Christians, Catholics, whatever you are - if you think like this then shame on you! You are chasing people out of churches calling their chronic illness a sin! You are making them feel unwelcome and unforgiven. You are making them feel weak and less superior. You are diminishing the little hope they may have walking into that church building onto to receive lashings of hateful words that leave deep-rooted scars.

Chronic illness means more than, "I have _________."

For many, it can mean lack of motivation, lack of energy, being in constant pain (emotionally, physically, mentally), having to skip out on things you really wanted to go to, being trash talked by people who don't get it, being accused of telling lies and faking illness, being alone in a hospital room sometimes with no one coming to see you, feeling a loss of control over your life, not being able to chase your dream career.

Ordinarily, I would be at church if I could be there, but what am I supposed to do when I'm sick every weekend because the week is jam packed with stress? Deal with the fact that I must be a liar because clearly no one misses a month or two of church for that many Sundays in a row.

If I could get better I would, but instead? "Try this herb! Try this technique! Try this exercise! You don't have to take medication forever!" Honestly, I'm all for holistic when it's necessary and effective and for my condition, these things might reduce symptoms, but it's not a cure. What do you do when you're a danger to yourself or others if you're not on medication and have a problem? Well, you stick with the program and feel guilt that you have to put pills in your mouth every time you exhale before that drink of water to swallow the poison down.

For those that spout at me, "God will heal you!" Well, you know. I'm standing here...waiting. I've been waiting for 23 years already...and believe me I have asked, I have pleaded, I have cried, I have been sincere...the answer has been, "No."

I try hard to be in the best mood possible for others, to forget I have health issues when they don't interfere with the small, simple things. It's exhausting! Sometimes I don't try and let my weary face show because I'm tired. When you ask me, "Is everything okay?" and then walk away from me when I say, "No." I feel incredibly special, so loved, and totally welcome...not.

I might be able to get out Saturday because I feel good enough to push myself to go out. I know getting out does me good. If you see me perfectly healthy on Saturday, but I don't come in on Sunday, don't crucify me and call me a liar. My issues can flare up and anytime, without notice, without my consent, and I can be bedridden for days....literally. I know the details of my life, most others do not know what it takes for me to get through each day, and to stand there and be criticized for trying is beyond outrageous.

Just because I have health issues doesn't mean I don't believe in God, but the way other Christians see me and other people in general sure does make me struggle more than anyone knows...

I'm suffering...my body fails me...I hurt every day...why must people be so critical when I'm trying so hard?

 

[Peterlag]

There is a problem with deciding that God is in control of evil. Why is He behind the evil he punishes for being evil? Why does the Bible describe some evil as a matter that never even entered his thinking? It is more complex but closer to the truth to say that He endures the evil as ending it by power is worse. He puts limits on evil, but he does not sponsor it nor steer it nor is in charge of evil when it is done.

Why does it have to be God in control of everything when the whole world from every culture since the beginning of man has spoken about gods, angels, demons, and Satan? Even the Buddha speak about the realm of angry spirits. This the invisible society of spirits do seem to be behind much that occurs in the physical world.

 

[christian1724]

...
Although, I don't believe my situation is a Job-like one. I've been struggling for years. I don't see it that way. I see it as a result of a fallen world that has illness.

I feel like a lot of Christians that accuse others with chronic illness of terrible things are ones that tend to overlook Job, or somehow not learned anything by reading it.

Yes. I think Job is a lesson to teach people to be careful when assessing what is 'evil' or 'wrong' (and what is brought on by sinfulness). We just cannot know what His ways are or the reasons for them.

Much of the suffering inflicted on Job was life long, but yes, there was a sort of finality to it that is kind of lacking in chronic illnesses.

I hope you are doing well.

 

[Dorothy Mae]

Yes. I think Job is a lesson to teach people to be careful when assessing what is 'evil' or 'wrong' (and what is brought on by sinfulness). We just cannot know what His ways are or the reasons for them.

Much of the suffering inflicted on Job was life long, but yes, there was a sort of finality to it that is kind of lacking in chronic illnesses.

I hope you are doing well.

A correction, we can know Gods ways. Moses did.

 

[Whatever]

They have built the high places of Baal to burn their children in the fire as offerings to Baal—something I did not command or mention, nor did it enter my mind. Jeremiah 19:5

What didn't enter God's mind was to command them to offer their children in the fire.

Deu 12:29 “When the LORD your God cuts off before you the nations whom you go in to dispossess, and you dispossess them and dwell in their land,
Deu 12:31 You shall not worship the LORD your God in that way, for every abominable thing that the LORD hates they have done for their gods, for they even burn their sons and their daughters in the fire to their gods.

Israel hadn't even entered the land yet, and God is telling them about how the inhabitants burn their children in the fire to their gods. So, how could the concept of doing it not have entered His mind later? Again, what had not entered His mind was commanding them to do it. Above, He is actually telling them not to do it.

 

[Whatever]

This concept of God being in control of both good and evil is why we often consider a secret "divine blueprint" behind everything that is both good and evil being somehow an extension of God's good (but very mysterious) will. This is the biggest reason why we have trouble accepting the truth concerning the good and evil of the world we experience.

What is that truth?

 

[Whatever]

we can know Gods ways. Moses did.

Your kidding right? You disagree with Paul.

Rom 11:33 O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out!

 

[christian1724]

Your kidding right? You disagree with Paul.

Rom 11:33 O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out!

I like how Paul put that. I also like how God put it in Isaiah.

Isa 55:7 Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. 8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.

 

[evenifigoalone]

I grew up with a chronically ill parent. We, or at least I, earnestly believed he would be totally healed one day. That day never came, and my stepdad passed away at the end of 2012. People have all kinds of advice for chronic illnesses, but it's never actually helpful. People will never understand unless they've actually had the experience.

If you are looking for another church, my church actually does online services every Sunday. You can PM me if you want to know more. We have people with varying degrees of chronic illness and disability in our church and we never make it out to be a sin issue.

 

[Luminous_Rose]

I work in neurology so I see lots and lots of people with obvious neurological health issues. It took some getting used to but it became normal to see people live meaningful lives even with the burden of chronic illness. They are treated as normal because in our daily duties they are normal. Your illness is less challenging than MS and even these we see as people first.

Regarding the unemployment, we’ve been there and are looking at that again. My life has not been free of troubles. We pray and do our part.

I am also fairly lonely. But I’ll tell you why I nevertheless feel deeply satisfied in life. I learned to press into God cultivating a passion for Him that’s become the deepest relationship in my life. This doesn’t compete with other relationships but enhances them.

The details of this and how to get there involve a lot of words to explain. But this has been my source of love and friendship and correction and guidance and that for decades. When man failed me, God was there.

Even though it's "less challenging" than MS (which I can't always agree with when it comes to drug resistant epilepsy and things like that), it still stinks....and I feel like for some reason I'm just gonna get worse health wise, not better. My medications take some nutrients, I'm losing the battle with being able to keep my teeth, I get deep settled pain in my bones (my femur being the worst for the past week), my knees are weak, my muscles often ache, sometimes I get no sleep because I can tell my body is convulsing and I can't call anyone for help so if no one notices I'm out of luck and in for a restless day, there are no neurologists in my area that can take me - I must pay the gas price to go to a neurologist (a 4 hour round trip), the depression is real, I'm still remembering things since I was terribly ill from 2020 and who knows what I'm gonna forget forever, not being able to drive keeps me from getting most jobs/side gigs (who wants to hire an employee that doesn't think they will show up?), tired and fatigued every day, I have to avoid so many foods because of all my sensitivities and some are incredibly important to avoid because my reaction to some of them is so severe it can bring on seizures (although, I think it's more like neurotoxic pesticides than the food alone) so my relationship with food is aggravating, it's rare I even get a, "Hey, how are you?" from anyone but my husband...feels like few people out there even care.

My peace is gone. Stripped from me. I have none right now. My body is failing me, I wish I could have a new one. I am missing out on so much life because I feel like garbage. I hate wanting to go out and do something only to last minute have to cancel because I literally can't get out and have to stay home and rest.

Yes, God is there...watching over me as I struggle so I live as long as he wants me while I suffer. This world is rubbish.

 

[Luminous_Rose]

My dad was an epileptic,he had grand mal seizures.


He said in the 70s and before you had to try to hide that as jobs would discriminate against you.

I grew up with him not being able to drive at times .my sister has that .it's genetic in this case .

Sad to hear

I know the feeling. If I apply for jobs, sometimes they see I have a state ID instead of a driver's license and they never call me back or even bother to tell me if I've gotten the job. It can be many cases an employer does this, but I feel the lack of driver's license in a big one because they figure I won't get to work. I've never had the opportunity to fully get a driver's license. I can't even remember what all I learned while having my permit a few years ago, I guess it doesn't matter much for now - can't drive anyway.

I have no known cause - idiopathic. There's no answer, no one else in my family has seizures that we know of, and that's just how it is.

 

[Luminous_Rose]

I grew up with a chronically ill parent. We, or at least I, earnestly believed he would be totally healed one day. That day never came, and my stepdad passed away at the end of 2012. People have all kinds of advice for chronic illnesses, but it's never actually helpful. People will never understand unless they've actually had the experience.

If you are looking for another church, my church actually does online services every Sunday. You can PM me if you want to know more. We have people with varying degrees of chronic illness and disability in our church and we never make it out to be a sin issue.

I'm sorry to hear of your loss it's never easy to lose someone.

Thanks for the offer. I think I'll probably try to force myself to get out of the house next week if I'm well enough and go to a different church that doesn't seem to discriminate in town. I'm glad you have a church, though, that doesn't look down on others poorly for their illness.

It's true, people offer much unsolicited advice. I hear the "natural cure" thing all the time, but...there are times that won't fully heal a person, but it can help manage symptoms. I do believe some things are more heal-able than others, but epilepsy just isn't one of those things from my own experience and listening to others. I can do my best to reduce symptoms, increase good life choices, but it might only take one menstrual cycle...one time of me getting the common cold and I have one. It sets me back a lot...

 

[Dorothy Mae]

Your kidding right? You disagree with Paul.

Rom 11:33 O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out!

Paul wrote that his desire was to know Christ. He also knew that Jesus said, “This is eternal life, that they might know you.” Paul also knew the OT “Let he who boasts a boast in this, that he understands Me.” If his ways are a mystery to a man, that man doesn’t understand.

Moses knew the ways of God. They past finding out, but they aren’t past understanding. The question isn’t IF Moses knew the ways of God. The Bible says he did. The question is how did he come by this information.

 

[Dorothy Mae]

Even though it's "less challenging" than MS (which I can't always agree with when it comes to drug resistant epilepsy and things like that), it still stinks....and I feel like for some reason I'm just gonna get worse health wise, not better. My medications take some nutrients, I'm losing the battle with being able to keep my teeth, I get deep settled pain in my bones (my femur being the worst for the past week), my knees are weak, my muscles often ache, sometimes I get no sleep because I can tell my body is convulsing and I can't call anyone for help so if no one notices I'm out of luck and in for a restless day, there are no neurologists in my area that can take me - I must pay the gas price to go to a neurologist (a 4 hour round trip), the depression is real, I'm still remembering things since I was terribly ill from 2020 and who knows what I'm gonna forget forever, not being able to drive keeps me from getting most jobs/side gigs (who wants to hire an employee that doesn't think they will show up?), tired and fatigued every day, I have to avoid so many foods because of all my sensitivities and some are incredibly important to avoid because my reaction to some of them is so severe it can bring on seizures (although, I think it's more like neurotoxic pesticides than the food alone) so my relationship with food is aggravating, it's rare I even get a, "Hey, how are you?" from anyone but my husband...feels like few people out there even care.

My peace is gone. Stripped from me. I have none right now. My body is failing me, I wish I could have a new one. I am missing out on so much life because I feel like garbage. I hate wanting to go out and do something only to last minute have to cancel because I literally can't get out and have to stay home and rest.

Yes, God is there...watching over me as I struggle so I live as long as he wants me while I suffer. This world is rubbish.

I’ve never been in your shoes so I have only a general advise. It is what I would do. Ask God what you should do and do it. Seek Him for what you should do.

 

[arkadian1960]

Where does this idea even come from?

Why do other Christians blame people with chronic illness by saying, "You're in sin!" or, "This was an act of God!" or, "You've been smited by God!"

These things are so immensely hurtful. I'm at a point right now where I'm so fed up, I almost don't want to be church-going Christian anymore. I'm about to give up on church, I don't want to be with people like that...I know the God's truth, but I'm so tired of people and their ridiculous ideations of chronic illness = sin.

Being a chronic illness sufferer since I was a child, what could I have possibly done to deserve a life long illness?

I was talking to my own mother today. My husband and I had a friend that made a lifestyle choice that goes against Christian belief and God's word. He ended up with the same type of health issue I do and was having problems here and there and was more recently hospitalized. My husband and I reached out, made sure he was okay, if he needed anything. I feel for my friend...even though they have made horrible choices...I still care because I know what it's like...he also had an issue with this in his teenage years, but it was a one-time thing and it was considered a one time stress induced problem by doctors, but now with all the stress he's had at work, the odd hours, the lack of sleep, not drinking or eating enough at work, etc. have all brought this to the surface. When my own mom said, "Maybe it was an act of God..." I froze a moment...my own mother here...I have the same type of health problem...what am I then?

Christians, Catholics, whatever you are - if you think like this then shame on you! You are chasing people out of churches calling their chronic illness a sin! You are making them feel unwelcome and unforgiven. You are making them feel weak and less superior. You are diminishing the little hope they may have walking into that church building onto to receive lashings of hateful words that leave deep-rooted scars.

Chronic illness means more than, "I have _________."

For many, it can mean lack of motivation, lack of energy, being in constant pain (emotionally, physically, mentally), having to skip out on things you really wanted to go to, being trash talked by people who don't get it, being accused of telling lies and faking illness, being alone in a hospital room sometimes with no one coming to see you, feeling a loss of control over your life, not being able to chase your dream career.

Ordinarily, I would be at church if I could be there, but what am I supposed to do when I'm sick every weekend because the week is jam packed with stress? Deal with the fact that I must be a liar because clearly no one misses a month or two of church for that many Sundays in a row.

If I could get better I would, but instead? "Try this herb! Try this technique! Try this exercise! You don't have to take medication forever!" Honestly, I'm all for holistic when it's necessary and effective and for my condition, these things might reduce symptoms, but it's not a cure. What do you do when you're a danger to yourself or others if you're not on medication and have a problem? Well, you stick with the program and feel guilt that you have to put pills in your mouth every time you exhale before that drink of water to swallow the poison down.

For those that spout at me, "God will heal you!" Well, you know. I'm standing here...waiting. I've been waiting for 23 years already...and believe me I have asked, I have pleaded, I have cried, I have been sincere...the answer has been, "No."

I try hard to be in the best mood possible for others, to forget I have health issues when they don't interfere with the small, simple things. It's exhausting! Sometimes I don't try and let my weary face show because I'm tired. When you ask me, "Is everything okay?" and then walk away from me when I say, "No." I feel incredibly special, so loved, and totally welcome...not.

I might be able to get out Saturday because I feel good enough to push myself to go out. I know getting out does me good. If you see me perfectly healthy on Saturday, but I don't come in on Sunday, don't crucify me and call me a liar. My issues can flare up and anytime, without notice, without my consent, and I can be bedridden for days....literally. I know the details of my life, most others do not know what it takes for me to get through each day, and to stand there and be criticized for trying is beyond outrageous.

Just because I have health issues doesn't mean I don't believe in God, but the way other Christians see me and other people in general sure does make me struggle more than anyone knows...

I'm suffering...my body fails me...I hurt every day...why must people be so critical when I'm trying so hard?

Because they're ignorant

 

[Peterlag]

What is that truth?

The truth concerning the good and evil of the world we experience.

 

[Whatever]

Moses knew the ways of God. The Bible says he did.

Where does it say that? I've read all the way through the Bible from Genesis to Revelation in two different translations and never came to that conclusion. Moses did receive revelation from God to write what he did, but knowing God's ways.

 

[Dorothy Mae]

Where does it say that? I've read all the way through the Bible from Genesis to Revelation in two different translations and never came to that conclusion. Moses did receive revelation from God to write what he did, but knowing God's ways.

Psalm 103:7
He made known his ways unto Moses, his acts unto the children of Israel.

The people saw what God did. Moses knew why. So did all the prophets.

“Let him who boasts boast in this, that he UNDERSTANDS Me.”

 

[christian1724]

Where does it say that? I've read all the way through the Bible from Genesis to Revelation in two different translations and never came to that conclusion. Moses did receive revelation from God to write what he did, but knowing God's ways.

She'd argue just as adamantly against her own posts if she misread the name of the poster thinking it was someone else.

 

[for_his_glory]

Christians, Catholics, whatever you are - if you think like this then shame on you! You are chasing people out of churches calling their chronic illness a sin! You are making them feel unwelcome and unforgiven. You are making them feel weak and less superior. You are diminishing the little hope they may have walking into that church building onto to receive lashings of hateful words that leave deep-rooted scars.

I hear ya sis. None of us knows why some get healed and others do not as only God knows. I know you have great faith as well as many of us that deal with physical issues and it perturbs me when others say your faith is weak, or you don't have any faith. God has His reasons that those of great faith are not healed as I learned not to question Him anymore. I have physical problems that can be quite painful at times, but I learned that even if I am in pain, the pain is not going to keep me from those things I can still do and I will enjoy life and praise the Lord everyday who is always with me.

Most people who say you lack faith have never had anything wrong with them. Thank God we have that personal relationship with Him as He is all I need and want.

 

[for_his_glory]

Even though it's "less challenging" than MS (which I can't always agree with when it comes to drug resistant epilepsy and things like that), it still stinks....and I feel like for some reason I'm just gonna get worse health wise, not better. My medications take some nutrients, I'm losing the battle with being able to keep my teeth, I get deep settled pain in my bones (my femur being the worst for the past week), my knees are weak, my muscles often ache, sometimes I get no sleep because I can tell my body is convulsing and I can't call anyone for help so if no one notices I'm out of luck and in for a restless day, there are no neurologists in my area that can take me - I must pay the gas price to go to a neurologist (a 4 hour round trip), the depression is real, I'm still remembering things since I was terribly ill from 2020 and who knows what I'm gonna forget forever, not being able to drive keeps me from getting most jobs/side gigs (who wants to hire an employee that doesn't think they will show up?), tired and fatigued every day, I have to avoid so many foods because of all my sensitivities and some are incredibly important to avoid because my reaction to some of them is so severe it can bring on seizures (although, I think it's more like neurotoxic pesticides than the food alone) so my relationship with food is aggravating, it's rare I even get a, "Hey, how are you?" from anyone but my husband...feels like few people out there even care.

My peace is gone. Stripped from me. I have none right now. My body is failing me, I wish I could have a new one. I am missing out on so much life because I feel like garbage. I hate wanting to go out and do something only to last minute have to cancel because I literally can't get out and have to stay home and rest.

Yes, God is there...watching over me as I struggle so I live as long as he wants me while I suffer. This world is rubbish.