A Christian and an atheist in love, in need of potential advice?

[Alabaster]

i have been a christian for 15 yrs. and it has and always will.

you cant tell me that it wont. sure some may somehow last but its often the christian walks away from the lord.

i had a friend in church who prayed for her husband for yrs. he wasnt a bad person but didnt love God and also pulled her from church. they finally divorced.

they were married for over ten yrs.

Yes. I have heard it often said: You can more easily pull someone down the stairs than you can haul him up. In other words, in general, outside of God's direct command, joining in with unbelievers in the hope you can lead them to Christ will eventually cause a believer to compromise and even fall.

 

[FreshFTG]

]It isn't religion. It is the aroma of Christ that attracted you.

We can only hope and pray that you are being led to Christ.

you're making the mistake of assuming your religion is correct. as i asked before, if you have some kind of demonstrable evidence (not a bible quote, that doesn't prove anything to a non-christian) that Jesus is somehow embodied in someone then i'd like to see it.

I am not being led by Christ. i am driven by my own thoughts and motivations, logic and reason.

Look up Floyd and Sally McClung in Cape Town and their All Nations ministry at Ocean View. We send a large delegation to Capetown every year. I hope to go next year.

ok why would i want to look it up i'm an atheist? o.O but dude, OCEAN VIEW. i was gonna say something along on the lines you better hope you don't see me cos i'll throw something at you but if you're going to OCEAN VIEW forget it o.O i'm not kidding when i say the gangs WILL shoot at you xD

 

[FreshFTG]

TO ANY MODERATOR: i have decided that the debate is starting to become stale and i've gained everything i could from talking with you all. i'd like to thank you all (except alabaster) for giving me a better understanding of what my girl is going through. your insight is greatly appreciated. i'd also like to thank you for being accepting of an atheist on your boards and not making an issue out of it or making an issue out of an interfaith relationship. i was quite honestly expecting a lot more "alabasters" and was pleasantly surprised at the understanding you all gave. i could not find any way to delete my account from the settings tab so i am kindly requesting that you delete my account for me, as i will not be returning to this site.

friendly atheist farewells ;) :waving

 

[Alabaster]

you're making the mistake of assuming your religion is correct. as i asked before, if you have some kind of demonstrable evidence (not a bible quote, that doesn't prove anything to a non-christian) that Jesus is somehow embodied in someone then i'd like to see it.

Christians don't have religion---they have a relationship with God the Father through Jesus His Son.

Do you talk to Jan this way? She believes this as well. She doesn't assume either. She KNOWS.

I am not being led by Christ. i am driven by my own thoughts and motivations, logic and reason.

That is right. Christians are led by God.

ok why would i want to look it up i'm an atheist? o.O but dude, OCEAN VIEW. i was gonna say something along on the lines you better hope you don't see me cos i'll throw something at you but if you're going to OCEAN VIEW forget it o.O i'm not kidding when i say the gangs WILL shoot at you xD

No they won't. We walk protected in Christ.

 

[Alabaster]

TO ANY MODERATOR: i have decided that the debate is starting to become stale and i've gained everything i could from talking with you all. i'd like to thank you all (except alabaster) for giving me a better understanding of what my girl is going through. your insight is greatly appreciated. i'd also like to thank you for being accepting of an atheist on your boards and not making an issue out of it or making an issue out of an interfaith relationship. i was quite honestly expecting a lot more "alabasters" and was pleasantly surprised at the understanding you all gave. i could not find any way to delete my account from the settings tab so i am kindly requesting that you delete my account for me, as i will not be returning to this site.

friendly atheist farewells ;) :waving

I will continue to pray for you to see the light of Christ, and for the Lord to bring Jan the godly husband He has had planned for her since before she was even born.

 

[Chris]

living with different beliefs it is possible although not so beneficial. I know many couples in this type of relationship where one has christian beliefs and the other doesn't. When you form a relationship with someone your core cherished values can hold it together in troubled times, which are going to come as the relationship goes on in years.

there could be differences in issues- infant baptism, christian dedication etc. Your wife going to church events might eventually annoy you because you may feel sho dont spend enough time on weekends with you.

Me and my wife have the same values and beliefs. it is so much easier. when you have 2 jobs, a mortgage, nocturnal crying babies etc, you get short tempers and don't need any other reason to have extra worries. theose things test relationships to the limit and separate many.

This bible verse explains it well. The three strands are 2 partners and the third is god.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: (10) If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! (11) Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? (12) Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Amarriage intertwined with god can be a very strong one.. it helps.

 

[Deavonreye]

I have been following this thread since it started. Part of me thinks that people should be left to their own wills and let THEIR future unfold before them. Mistakes or no mistakes.

However, for me, though I am not seeking a relationship with a person of the oposite sex, . . . if I WERE to, they would not be from the christian perspective. I have been there before, when I was questioning. I was unable to play a role that was expected. Ultimately, . . . and fortunately, the relationship only lasted a short time. I missed the affection, . . . . but they really were quite dominating and narsasistic.

Some "unequally yoked" relationships can make it, . . . but there will most likely be trouble down the road. It isn't a matter of just religious affiliation. This can happen with other areas of strong conviction. Eventually, when "love" diminishes [which usually happens], the battle will gain in strength.

My 2 cents. And 2 cents doesn't buy much these days.

 

[Igor]

TO ANY MODERATOR: i have decided that the debate is starting to become stale and i've gained everything i could from talking with you all. i'd like to thank you all (except alabaster) for giving me a better understanding of what my girl is going through. your insight is greatly appreciated. i'd also like to thank you for being accepting of an atheist on your boards and not making an issue out of it or making an issue out of an interfaith relationship. i was quite honestly expecting a lot more "alabasters" and was pleasantly surprised at the understanding you all gave. i could not find any way to delete my account from the settings tab so i am kindly requesting that you delete my account for me, as i will not be returning to this site.

friendly atheist farewells ;) :waving

Hey FFTG;

If you've come back to read this, please re-consider leaving us! I don't know if the mods here delete accounts or not (in some forums they don't), but I think your presence here is valuable to all of us, including yourself. It has been good for us Christians to interact with you and be reminded that we are not as separate from the world as a lot of us like to think and say we are. I think it's been good for you as well as I think you have gained some understanding of what Jan will be facing from her Christian perspective in her relationship with you, and this will help you to understand and relate to her. There are other non-Christians that contribute and glean info from this site as well. Some atheists/agnostics, some from other religions, some just curious. In my short time here I've gained good insights from reading some of their posts as well, and it seems to have been a positive experience for many of them too.

For you in particular, if you continue your relationship with Jan, as I assume you will be doing, you may find that this site will be a help to you in the future to understand Christian perspectives when other issues come up. (You can also put Alabaster, as well as anyone else who's writing style really bugs you a lot, on your ignore list and you won't have to deal with them anymore!)

Not all Christians see everything the same way. Many of us see a certain area as pretty black and white when, in reality, it isn't so. Jan is probably not that much different, and it may help both of you to relate to each other by seeing other perspectives of what is required of Christians from other members here. Who knows, you two may (probably will) run into an impasse on a subject that she feels she can not do your way, and you can not do her way. Maybe you both would learn that what she thought was required by God was really just a requirement that came from church traditions of from a misinterpretation of scripture. Since Christians are not required to follow man's traditions or misinterpretations, with that knowledge (assuming she learns her stance was based on mis-information) maybe she would be able to relax her stance and the issue would be solved!

I wish that could have been the case in this thread for you. Unfortunately, scripture does seem pretty clear on the subject, and it didn't seem that anyone had any information to show that there are any exceptions that would apply to you beyond the fact that some people have managed to make it work, at least for a time. But sometimes exceptions are there, and someone who has studied it can give you insight!

Anyway, I wish you both the best of luck and hope you and Jan stay with us.

 

[Alabaster]

Many of us see a certain area as pretty black and white when, in reality, it isn't so. Jan is probably not that much different, and it may help both of you to relate to each other by seeing other perspectives of what is required of Christians from other members here.

This is a black and white issue.

I don't appreciate you telling someone it is OK to place me on ignore, when I have said nothing but the truth to that member.

The truth offends.

 

[Igor]

This is a black and white issue.

I don't appreciate you telling someone it is OK to place me on ignore, when I have said nothing but the truth to that member.

The truth offends.

Oh don't be so overly sensitive. I never said this particular issue was not a black and white issue. In fact, I didn't disagree with the principles you put forth in your posts at all. Go back and read my posts about it.

I also didn't tell him it's ok or not ok to put you on ignore. I said he could put anyone on ignore and only used your name because he already used it. I simply informed him of a feature on this forum that he was not aware of. I had nothing against you until you attacked me for no good reason. If you don't like the feature, take it up with administration. If you don't like to see me pointing out a feature to other members, put me on ignore. That's what it's there for.

 

[Alabaster]

Oh don't be so overly sensitive. I never said this particular issue was not a black and white issue. In fact, I didn't disagree with the principles you put forth in your posts at all. Go back and read my posts about it.

I also didn't tell him it's ok or not ok to put you on ignore. I simply informed him of a feature on this forum that he was not aware of. If you don't like the feature, take it up with administration. If you don't like me pointing out a feature to other members, put me on ignore. That's what it's there for.

Thank you. Merry Christmas.

 

[Alabaster]

i'd also like to thank you for being accepting of an atheist on your boards and not making an issue out of it or making an issue out of an interfaith relationship.

If there was no issue made of what we see as unequal bonding, which is against the will of God for every believer, then this board has failed this person and his Christian girlfriend. She is headed for trouble.