I have recently left Christianity. March 30th to be exact. Information that I had discovered that day by accident was the straw that broke the camel's back. I'll give you some back round on my life. I wasn't raised in a strong Christian house in my early life. My dad seemed to have a belief in God but his lifestyle didn't match up being that he was an abusive drunk. My mother seemed to have little to no belief. My dad became in trouble with the law and found God in prison. When he got out I was taken to a variety of churches until my Dad found one that fit his beliefs. I went for a few years, then I stopped and never really went back or to any other church. In my early adult life I got more into my Christian religion and reading the bible, listening to the bible, watching biblical shows, documentaries, movies, reading apocrypha, pseudepigrapha, early church history, early Jewish history, you name it. I never felt that churches represented what I believed by reading the bible. I also didn't believe that God existed in the formation of any of the denominations. I didn't let anything get in the way of my beliefs. Scientific issues never got in the way of my beliefs. I could always find debunkers of scientific contradictions and attacks as well as opposing scientists with differing scientific information. I could always get past secular histories conflicting with biblical histories being that the victors writing history as well as even looking at it with a conspiratory eye giving priority to the biblical(I also did this with the scientific). I could get past virtually all ancient cultures having a flood story and many cultures having a creation story, many of them seeming older than the Hebrew's. You could always say, well the Hebrews only wrote it down on papers so the papers decentagrated where other cultures had stone tablets and such things that lasted longer in antiquity. For Christianity I could get past the fact that there were other older religions and philosophies that contain similar Christian happenings of Jesus in the Gospels as well as his sayings. I thought something similar to Justin Matyr's reasoning that the devil counterfeited the information to man before the actual happenings to cause doubt in the real story except I differed that it wasn't the devil but angel human hybrids with heavenly knowledge that knew of Christ and that he would eventually come that what would happen. The only thing that I could not reconcile is information that I discovered that it appears that the Flavian Roman Dynasty created the Gospels which started as a satirical work as well as a pacification psychological operation. This theory is considered by scholars as not accurate, Christian or secular. It is also rejected by many mythicists. Regardless of what "experts" feel, in my heart, I knew this was true after reading a couple books on the evidence as well as a few documentaries and interviews combined with I saw how it was used by governments and empires as enslavement and mind control. I'm not writing this to be convinced otherwise of my beliefs. That is not possible. I'm writing it as an explanation of how I used to be a Christian(saved about 22 years ago) albeit an unconventional one, an active member here for some time, to now being an agnostic. I won't post any links to my reasoning of my beliefs as this is a Christian site and I don't want to tear people away from their religion. Trust me, I'd rather have J.C. by my side and eternal life in heaven. I just no longer feel this is the situation. As a Christian I've always been a seeker of truth and that's how I've come to my conclusions. Now I have nothing, and I'm learning how to live with that. I still have my morality, likes and dislikes, etc. I also don't feel I wasted my life. I am learning how to convert my beliefs and philosophies into a positive direction.