Do you consider this absurd?

[Classik]

Do you consider this absurd? Take for instance you are a German and you married a man from Ghana or Egypt or from any distant region. I'm not talking about people with different religious backgrounds. I'm talking about people of your own kind, say Christian Christian.

So do you kind of find it discomforting or discouraging to marry such a person from a very distant location?

Common questions:
where do we base?
How do we train the children?
How about the issue of, I wanna go home? Etc etc etc
:dunno

 

[Christ_empowered]

At least this hypothetical couple would have the same religion. Then again...cultural differences in a marriage can be a strain. So can age gaps, education gaps, socioeconomic differences, and race differences (just repeating what they taught me in sociology undergrad). Marrying someone from a different religion can be an issue, too.

I don't think I could do it, honestly. I mean, if the Christian aspect of both our lives was strong enough that we had similar worldviews, ideas about what our life together should look like and what we wanted to achieve, then OK. And the world is much smaller now, thanks to planes, trains, and automobiles. Still, I think it'd be a lot easier to marry Suzy Q Christian down the street than somebody whose upbringing and outlook would be completely different from mine.

 

[Claudya]

Take for instance you are a German

Why does that sound like this thread is aimed at me?

No, it's not absurd. Cross-cultural marriages happen, and many of them work well. Of course they have their own issues to deal with, for example those questions you mentioned. But their cultural difference can also be a resource to draw strength and inspiration from.
A woman that was my best friend in childhood days (we grew up next door to each other) is now married to a man from Ghana whom she met during her student exchange in Paris. I haven't talked to her in many years, but my parents still talk to her parents, and from the sound of it they are a happy family with two racially mixed kids. They still live in France together.

Also many years ago I participated in a volunteer exchange program in Zimbabwe. Pretty dang crazy country. But while being there I had a crush on one of the local guys. He was very educated and "western" (priviledged wealthy family background), and he was a psychology student like myself. I enjoyed talking to him very much. Also, he was hot. I hope life will always treat him kind. But I had a boyfriend waiting for me back home whom I also loved very much and wanted to be loyal to. Anyway, the idea of falling in love with someone from a different culture is not absurd. There's two opposite force is everyone's heart, one side is about finding and clinging to familiar things that we know and understand and can predict to give us a sense of belonging and safety. The other side craves excitement and exotic things that are different from what we know and give us a sense of adventure and challenge. Any relationship must find a balance between those two needs.
If you get married to your highschool sweatheart that grew up in your part of town you may be feel save and home easily, but you may also at some point start wondering if that's all life has for you, and where is the excitement and the adventure?
If you marry someone from a different continent and a different culture it's the opposite. It's all exciting and sexy, but in time the cultural differences may cause discord or misunderstandings and each side may long for an environment that is more familiar with them.
So you always gotta balance the need for similarity (safety) and the need for new-ness (excitement).
And any marriage is a challenge anyway. ;-)

 

[turnorburn]

Absurd if the husband told his wife the bidet was a facial basin.. :naughty

tob

 

[Jethro Bodine]

Take for instance you are a German

Why does that sound like this thread is aimed at me?

Lol, that's what I thought too.

...and from the sound of it they are a happy family with two racially mixed kids.

For some reason I keep reading this as 'two radically mixed up kids.'

...I had a crush on one of the local guys.
I enjoyed talking to him very much. Also, he was hot.

Yes, the weather can get quite warm there, I hear.

If you marry someone from a different continent and a different culture it's the opposite.

What about someone from a different planet?

It's all exciting and sexy, but in time the cultural differences may cause discord or misunderstandings and each side may long for an environment that is more familiar with them.

This is my opinion too. Don't marry out of your socio-economic group. Even if you can make it work, the other person may long uncontrollably for what is common and natural to them.

 

[Pizzaguy]

My son married a girl from Japan... while IN Japan, and ten years later he's still over there.

Not sure where this is going... he says they are moving to the states when he retires from the Navy in 7 years. But I wonder about his wife and leaving her country and parents, just as they get old? ????

Leave it to my kid to do something like this. I sure hope they stay married.

 

[Classik]

Absurd if the husband told his wife the bidet was a facial basin.. tob

:toofunny

 

[Classik]

Lol, that's what I thought too. For some reason I keep reading this as 'two radically mixed up kids.'

...I had a crush on one of the local guys. I enjoyed talking to him very much. Also, he was hot.

Yes, the weather can get quite warm there, I hear.

If you marry someone from a different continent and a different culture it's the opposite.

What about someone from a different planet?

It's all exciting and sexy, but in time the cultural differences may cause discord or misunderstandings and each side may long for an environment that is more familiar with them.

This is my opinion too. Don't marry out of your socio-economic group. Even if you can make it work, the other person may long uncontrollably for what is common and natural to them.

LOL. NO: its not about Claudya.

 

[Classik]

My son married a girl from Japan... while IN Japan, and ten years later he's still over there. Not sure where this is going... he says they are moving to the states when he retires from the Navy in 7 years. But I wonder about his wife and leaving her country and parents, just as they get old? ???? Leave it to my kid to do something like this. I sure hope they stay married.

Marriage is such a very serious issue. Have you ever visited her parents and people?

 

[Classik]

There is a verse in the OT that talks about: a man should marry from his own land. I know what this place is talking about: Christian vs Christian marriage. At the same time the Tower of Babel thing makes me think God really wants us to spread and multiply, fill the world with these mixtures. Besides we came from the same parents, A&E

 

[evenifigoalone]

I'm guessing the OT verse you speak of has historical reasons behind it, mainly in reference to how at the time anyone who was not with the nation of Israel was pagan.

 

[Pizzaguy]

I've not yet been to Japan... planning on going over there in 2014.

 

[DeaneRenata]

As for the people out there who claim christianity is a cult, it's not, there is not a single born-again christian alive who believes that mess, and neither should you.