[__ Prayer __] getting over it all...

[Christ_empowered]

what a difference The Lord makes!

I'm actually going into Wal-Mart to get things I want+need. Before, things were so rough, both in terms of what was actually happening and in terms of my inner-turmoil, that I avoided doing such things. Today, when I went, I thought I overheard some dude talking about how I "...can never become a man," but people in my small town have said that a lot about me, so it might have just been a replay.

My dad loves me takes good care of me, my mother, too. Mama's coming in from her trip overseas late tonight, btw. She has a cold, but other than that it seems she's doing well. I thank you all for your prayers.

Yesterday, my Dunkin Donuts person gave me a free drink. Today, I paid less than 1/2 price for (entirely too large) coffee. Not everyone around here despises me, it seems. Little things...matter, especially for someone in my situation ((they also offered me a free donut, but I declined, lol)).

I'm hoping+praying that things get better and I can move forward onto...something. Its weird. I realize now that when that shrink at the 2nd mental hospital said I had cancer (9 years ago and counting...), he may very well have not been messing with me. Kinda explains a lot, actually.

And now...now, I'm on disability. No treatment for cancer or whatever it was that ailed me, but I'm healthy, which is a (big) Miracle. I dunno. Its so odd...now, I have energy, I can concentrate, I can do things, and I'm beginning to wonder where God's going with my life. I mean, He's good, no matter what. That goes without saying, of course. But if I had cancer and I probably don't now, then that would mean He's been extra-kind to me, and to my family, too.

I'm rambling, as usual. God is good! I thank you all (y'all down here, lol) for your prayers and support over the years. It really means a lot to me, especially now that I'm...well, I've largely awakened to a new life, a life in which I'm free, safe, and usually comfortable. Washed and made clean, set free from all sorts of horrible things.

What does my future hold? I dunno, honestly. Its hard enough for people who played by the rules and didn't get mystery illnesses to score (and keep) stable, decent paying jobs. I might end up being healthy, surprisingly intelligent, saved+set free...and on disability, probably living with or very near my parents for years to come (God willing). Not the worst possible outcome by any stretch of the imagination.

Anyway....I Praise God for bringing me so far! I'm a New Creation in Christ Jesus, and I'm learning to enjoy my new life. I also ask that you keep on praying for my parents and for me, too.

Thanks again.

 

[Pegasus]

Praise the Lord!

 

[Eugene]

.
Amen, and praise worthy of God's abundant grace toward your healing in the way.
I thoroughly enjoyed that.

 

[AirDancer]

Our Lord has graced you with a new life, one freed of all the detritus of your earlier life, Christ_empowered. He's still working in your life ... and you are listening to & also willing to be guided by Him. There's no limit to what you can achieve with our Lord's grace & mercy!

 

[Christ_empowered]

thanks. its odd to think, now, that I was in varying degrees of ill-health (from sickly to straight up, quite possibly near death...) for about 10 years +/-, and now...well, I'm remarkaly, genuinely, miraculously...healthy. Its a miracle I even lived long enough to get genuinely saved 4 years ago, age 28, and The Lord's work in my life since has been (to me and my family) nothing short of a (massive) Miracle.

But yeah; putting aside what is behind. Take up your plow and push forward. It does get hard, when people in the neighborhood let me know "how we feel about you," etc. I mean, I get it. They look at me, they see a "passed around f@ggot," junky, narcissist, etc. etc. etc.

I'm getting over that, too. Having a "smart phone" (I'm now officially one of the Cool Kidz, btw) with MP3 functions helps. When I'm outside alone, I can listen to my music. Life is better that way. But aside from the avoidance tactics, I've learned that...well, I was a wretched human being, and this is a small, southern town. Its not all that surprising that I went through some of the things I went thru--I started out as a "working class loser"--but The Lord's work in my life sets me apart from a lot of other school-to-prison pipeline people, small town pariahs, "victims of psychiatry," etc.

Moving forward, moving on. Not always the easiest thing ever, but The Lord has been good to provide what I need to do a better job of it, day by day. Along the way, I seem to have made strides towards a genuine "recovery" from...well, that existence I had, before Christ. I even have more memories now, of my life before the electroshock and everything...but thanks to The Lord, I don't get as bogged down in everything.

Thanks again for your prayers+support.

 

[GodsGrace]

Hi CE

I do believe your life will get better and better.
And even in the difficult times...You have God now!
You'll always have more strength than before.
I think and pray for you often.
God is with you.