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[__ Prayer __] Help please, I'm really struggling

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Paul1965

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I'm not good at asking for help so if come come across as a blunt arrogant so n so, that's not my intention sorry.

I'm struggling. Not in my faith or in my love for Christ. Just struggling with everything else.
No focus, no sleep, pounding headaches, no energy, no will to bother trying. Some days I return to the really dark thoughts of years ago (Life insurance+rope= Thayanee and Eli's future taken care of)
It's only fleeting and i know it's a sin i cannot repent for so therefore damning myself but worse, it would be a spit in the face to Jesus who has worked tirelessly for me.
That's the other part that's killing me inside. Knowing how much He has done for me, how tireless is His work, who am I to complain that I;m tired or burnt out , whatever.
I'm the type of person who usually rolls up my sleeves and gets down and dirty to make things happen. I live by Philippians 4:13. But now, I just don't seem to have it any more. Trying to better our situation for Thayanee and Eli, but even with that huge motivation, my focus on work both at school and writing is missing.
The only positive, a very big positive, is that my focus on the Gospel and studying it has become fervent.
All I ask, is that you pray for us that God will reveal His will for me, so I can work towards pleasing Him and in doing so be the husband and father I need to be for Thayanee and Eli please.
Thank you for your time brothers and sisters
 
Dear Brother Paul, that so hurts me to hear of your present suffering and I will surely pray for your soon deliverance in the wonderful power of our Lord toward you just as He as the good Samaritan picked us all from the horrible pit we were in, stood us on our feet, and paid all for our good.

I know you know the following scripture, but when I came to the end of me when in trouble I needed every confidence for the reason I was where I was, and especially that I was not alone or forsaken. Can we think that, or was I the only one to hurt that badly.

1Pet 4:12 Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
1Pe 4:13 But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.

Is this easy? Absolutely not or it would not do its intended work, and that is definitely not chastisement but for your good (Rom 8:28).

1 Pet 1:7 That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:

Brother, we are entirely God’s work in progress (Eph 2:10), as He works in us to will, and to do after His good pleasure (Php 2:13), and as such He establishes us as He takes us in His will for us from the good, the acceptable, and finally the perfect. And He is not done with any of us.

These things are working patience in our lives and do not discount the fact that Jesus too learned obedience from the things He suffered (Heb 5:8). Jesus stands with you in the fire just as He was with Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego as we read in Dan 3:25 I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.

James 1:4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. God has not forsaken you brother, He will not fail you, and you will see His great hand power bring you through the storm. Don’t even entertain your present thoughts, because your wife and child need you, as well as the mother-in-law that worships tree or whatever. Your light of Jesus is the only light they are going to see, and with Christ you can do all things.

Is you present depression possible medical? Please at least have it checked.

Dear Father, I come to You this morning asking for Your great mercy and grace be granted Brother Paul to see the help You are giving him, and to rest in the cleft of the Rock as it were in this storm of his life. Please give him the peace he so needs to experience such as I paste here Lord: to give unto him beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. Thank You Father for Your continual love of us in all our ways and I thank You for hearing this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
 
I'm not good at asking for help so if come come across as a blunt arrogant so n so, that's not my intention sorry.

I'm struggling. Not in my faith or in my love for Christ. Just struggling with everything else.
No focus, no sleep, pounding headaches, no energy, no will to bother trying. Some days I return to the really dark thoughts of years ago (Life insurance+rope= Thayanee and Eli's future taken care of)
It's only fleeting and i know it's a sin i cannot repent for so therefore damning myself but worse, it would be a spit in the face to Jesus who has worked tirelessly for me.
That's the other part that's killing me inside. Knowing how much He has done for me, how tireless is His work, who am I to complain that I;m tired or burnt out , whatever.
I'm the type of person who usually rolls up my sleeves and gets down and dirty to make things happen. I live by Philippians 4:13. But now, I just don't seem to have it any more. Trying to better our situation for Thayanee and Eli, but even with that huge motivation, my focus on work both at school and writing is missing.
The only positive, a very big positive, is that my focus on the Gospel and studying it has become fervent.
All I ask, is that you pray for us that God will reveal His will for me, so I can work towards pleasing Him and in doing so be the husband and father I need to be for Thayanee and Eli please.
Thank you for your time brothers and sisters
Paul, I just lifted you and yours up to Jesus and will continue to do so as I am led by the Spirit. I urge you forward in your study of the scriptures fro there is an answer to be revealed by our LORD. In times of trouble I am often found in the Word and God has always, in His time, answered me. He will do the same for you.
 
You sound stressed! I'll pray for things to be made smoother, easier for you. What's that Pentecostal saying...you have to go through a test to have a testimony? Something like that. Anyway, I'll keep you and your family up in prayer, as will lots of other people on CFnet.
 
I'm the type of person who usually rolls up my sleeves and gets down and dirty to make things happen. I live by Philippians 4:13. But now, I just don't seem to have it any more. Trying to better our situation for Thayanee and Eli, but even with that huge motivation, my focus on work both at school and writing is missing.

Me to.. stepping back and letting the Lord 'do' is most difficult. I know He can do 'it' better but i want to do..... Years back mom would say be Psalms 46:10 still and know that i am God... He wants to be your rest your peace, joy your all in all....

Psa 55:22 Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.
 
in pentacostal circles that is old. you must have not been to many pentacostal churches.
I've been attending a Pentecostal nondenominational church for over thirty years, though we've no membership other than being in Christ and are probably not privileged to clichés circulated throughout organized Christendom. :shrug
 
When I experience times such as what you face now, I turn to Psalm 69, with focus on verses 13 - 19:

13. But as for me, my prayer is to You, O Lord, at an acceptable time; O God, in the greatness of Your lovingkindness, Answer me with Your saving truth.
14. Deliver me from the mire and do not let me sink; May I be delivered from my foes and from the deep waters.
15. May the flood water not overflow me, Nor the deep swallow me up, Nor the pit shut its mouth on me.
16. Answer me, O Lord, for Your loving kindness is good; According to the greatness of Your compassion, turn to me,
17. And do not hide Your face from Your servant, For I am in distress; answer me quickly.
18. Oh draw near to my soul and redeem it; Ransom me because of my enemies!
19. You know my reproach and my shame and my dishonor; All my adversaries are before You.

Our Lord supports and strengthens us during times of trials, even when we feel as though we are drowning in the depths. When (not if) He answers, there is such a renewal, completely and utterly amazing. But then, you already know this as member of our Lord's family.

There are many praying with and for you, Paul; I add my prayers for you and your family.

Be blessed!
 
I have had times like you are having. God made it clear to me that:
1. You are NOT RESPONSIBLE for what the world does.
2. You are NOT RESPONSIBLE for the failures of others.
3. You are NOT RESPONSIBLE for all the chaos and strife.
4. You are NOT EVEN RESPONSIBLE for your own sin and failings if confessed to God, He paid that debt.

All you are responsible for is HOW YOU RESPOND and Show the world JESUS IN YOU!!

One Day AT THE TIME!!
 
Paul, in the last few months there has been a big change in your life. It's not easy having a baby in the house it takes getting used to. And then if I remember correctly he got sick? I don't know if he is sleeping through the night yet.....You teach and then work at night on the side....It's no wonder you are stressed and just plain tried. That pretty much happens with all new parents. You mentioned money, I don't know if that is part of your burden but I am going to pray about that too. It can't hurt.
We will be lifting you in prayer.

Psa 63:1 A Psalm of David, when he was in the wilderness of Judah. O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is;
Psa 63:2 To see thy power and thy glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary.
Psa 63:3 Because thy lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee.
Psa 63:4 Thus will I bless thee while I live: I will lift up my hands in thy name.
Psa 63:5 My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness; and my mouth shall praise thee with joyful lips:
Psa 63:6 When I remember thee upon my bed, and meditate on thee in the night watches.
Psa 63:7 Because thou hast been my help, therefore in the shadow of thy wings will I rejoice.
Psa 63:8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
 
Thank you everyone for your prayers and tracts I'll answer each of you via a PM when I get the chance. Things took a turn for the worse today with school announcing that the semester is finishing 6 weeks early to be in line with US semesters. Why, I don't know because we don't have snow to contend with and spring / summer is year round basically...more of the Thai "if it's American, we want it" attitude....
Anyway the Result? bye bye 1.5 months salary....Thai teachers still get theirs but as I'm a farang....nope

All I know is that God is using this to strengthen and shape me
Amen
 
Hi Paul, I pray that Jehovah Jireh will supply all that you need. "Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen". You are in good Hands!
 
Brother Paul, I have no idea what God has in mind with the work being performed in your life, but if allowed He will establish and provide to make all things work together for your good. I continue in prayer for you and look forward to your PM's.Blessings in Christ Jesus.
 
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